I hate to even say this thought out loud but where we are located, the south, there is still the good ol boy mentality. My husband being male usually gets a better response than i do. However i think this time we aren’t going to win.

^I totally understand. I'm in S Fl which has a more northern mentality, but not by much and not for very long. I still run into the good ol boy mentality especially in construction trades and commercial real estate, even here. As you move further north in Florida it gets more pronounced too :(

The GOB mentality can be a problem here, too (NC). I've got an advantage, I speak construction, but I still get a patronizing tone by a builder I've never met before.

Oh, it's not confined to any part of the country, that's for sure!

What it's confined to are the minds of the men that are treating us that way.

By far worse in the south. I'm a born and raised Californian. Built two homes in CA. Now in the south and building my second home here and there is no comparison!

You know a few days ago when you were telling us of your travails with the shower I was wondering if the builder was giving you grief because you were female, but I was afraid to suggest it.

Not long ago a friend (a very bright, well dressed professional with a lot of money to spend) was shopping for a luxury car and was treated rather shabbily at the dealership and left infuriated.

I told her next time just take someone with a Y chromosome. Anyone.

She was indignant of course, but I'm a little older than she.

Life is too short.

If I can get a better deal, or get treated better simply by bringing a male with me, that's what I'll do.

Of course, if I can go to a place where a priori I know I'll be treated better and get a great deal if I go by myself, that's where I'll go.

^I totally agree. Car dealers are an exception though because they will mistreat everyone......not just women.

Oh, that makes me feel better. I just took my brother to get my last car. I didn't like the way the sales person was treating me, and it was a woman salesperson!! I counted to 10 and went to the manager and said if you want to make a deal, you better take care of me yourself. And then it was getting late and I had to leave, and then I came back with my brother anyway, but I still went to the manager.

My husband and I decide on a car and then I do the bargaining. Anyone who keeps directing money questions to him loses the sale. I'm fortunate, because in situations like that he says "Don't ask me, she's the one who's got the answers."

Can you make sure that when they tile it it is so you can later remove the tile and replace just the seat and the ledge with a solid surface material of your choice. Ie not edge pieces added or if there is some extra tiles so you can fix that part. It would be the simplest at this point, assuming the water proofing is satisfactory.

Denita

^I totally agree. Car dealers are an exception though because they will mistreat everyone......not just women.

I realized that decades ago and now feel sorry for all car dealers I, and now my son (who's a master at this) bought cars from in any continent (Asia, Europe and US); yup we took them all for a ride whether these were for brand new luxury cars or used cars of any type, cash or ridiculously low lease deals. We cannot deal with dum* guys but the most intelligent and seasoned sales persons, managers etc. ones who take their customers for a ride, those are the ones we take for a ride. Honestly I'm not joking but these guys don't know what hit them until we drive away from the lot. Up to a few years ago I thought I knew it all but now my son is way better than me, hands down.

^So glad the consumer wins in your case. Write a blog and pass your secrets on to the rest of us:)

The best advice I can give for car buying is buy at the end of a month or quarter and be willing to walk. We walked on our last two cars when we couldn't come to the terms we wanted. both on a weekend and somewhere before that weekend was over they called us back agreeing to our terms.

So glad the consumer wins in your case. Write a blog and pass your secrets on to the rest of us:)

I win most negotiations except against my DW, DD and DS, they know me too well and can't be fooled.

Watch four or five episodes of Shark Tank and you can observe different bargaining methods, see what works and what doesn't. My negotiation skills went up after doing that.

In pink_peony's case, she may have to make an offer like: You install the piece of quartz I want for X price and I'll accept smaller 2 3/4" crown instead of the 3 1/2" that was spec'd. It's a give and take. My bet is that there are other things about this job the contractor wants you to accept that you don't like. Settle on one that you can stand and try to make a trade-off. A successful negotiation gives all the parties something that they want. If you understand that, you're half-way home.

If a contractor's pushing me to pay for a cost overrun that wasn't my fault, he'll often accept my offer to split the difference and will continue to work with me and not try to foil every effort I make. In my business, I need to maintain good relationships with contractors but also make it clear that I'm not a pushover and that I won't pay anything they charge, especially if it's not reasonable.

If the choice is between the 3.. I think the middle ties it in best, but personally I would put the black in. Have a real nice contrast going.

Designer Drains what black? The shower is carerra marble hexagons and 6 x 16” beveled white tiles. I’m confused on the Black comment.

Pink_peony, I also wanted to add my voice of sympathy to the others...It sounds as if you're being bullied just for the sake of it..

Too many caveats and restrictions and nonsense...they need to remember that they work for you and not the other way around...

As of today we can’t reverrse our upgrades. They were signed off on and they won’t let us go back to standard as all material was ordered.

We also can’t do a solid slab seat. Period. Won’t go into sordid details on that.

We also can’t large (12 x 24”) MARBLE tiles on seat . They won’t warranty the marble.

Those are all the no’s. so that said these are my current choices.

1. I do a 6 x 16” tile that ISNT beveled to match beveled wall tile. This will be done on seat top and seat front and curb top. It will done in a offset pattern like wall is. It would be done like this seat top but in larger tiles of course.

2. I carry the carerra hexagon off the floor up the face of seat and seat top and curb top.

3. I choose a 12 x 24” white tile which will do on seat top and seat front. This is a picture of how they do that size tile. I think it looks “off”. I would think they would center one 12 x 24” tile on the seat top then do a shorter tile on each side so it is more centred. Of course as i was told “I’m not a tile layer”.

Visually i think the hexagon would look the best followed by the 6” x 16” tiles. I’m not thrilled with the 12 x 24” choice due to the way the lay it.

Are any likely to be less problematic than the other? :-(

Just my own experience of a tiled (4x4) shower seat: It's absolutely crucial that this is pitched correctly and tiled perfectly. Even if the pitch is right..all it takes is ONE tile to be just a tiny bit down toward the back wall, and water will pool.

As much as I love the hex tile, I think the above might have a greater possibility of happening with tiny tiles.

Personally, I would be okay with the no warranty...with the full realization of what that means...but that's me.

I'd have to see the actual bench and the 6x16 tiles. (whats the dimensions of bench?)

as for problems,,,as long as the bench is made properly and is waterproofed to the hills and back, it won't be a problem. will the water spray reach the bench every shower? if it's constantly getting wet, then more grout lines mean more discoloration down the road. so doing the hex means more grout and larger grout lines.

Penny design i considered it but those marble tiles also don’t come in a bullnose so the edge of the seat would have no bullnose. It would be rough. Plus I’m just not confident enough anymore I’m this builder to sacrifice voiding warranty.

pink,,,any tile guy can bullnose those marble tiles. hell, I can do it. takes two minutes.

or, why not do a schluter strip instead of the bullnose/

examples of edging

Beth the seat is somewhere between 3-4’ wide by 16” deep. The 3rd picture above is almost same size .

Beth we were typing at same time. What a skilled tile person can do and what the builder is willing to do seem to be two different things here. We’ve fought ? Gone round and round with them for two weeks now? Regardless they won’t warranty the large marble tiles. It’s ridiculous. They completed the drywall this week (finally) tile starts next week they wanted the decision for this days ago. They start tile next week.

I can't believe they will warranty a marble mosaic, but won't warranty a 16" marble tile. jesus. any chance of you changing the beveled glass tile to regular tile and then doing that on the seat? If not, then I'd go w/the hex tile on the bench w/a schluter gray trim piece. that will look the most uniform.

oh,,,if you can,,take a slew of pics during the prep phase (especially the building of this bench) and install phase. also make sure the warranty is written well enough so that they won't be able to wrangle out of it down the road.

I really love the beveled tile. I don’t want to axe it. Idk if i can this late. They can do the same tile without bevel for seat. I think i might send them into cardiac arrest if i tried to get them they do a Schluter trim. Actually they would probably tell me they don’t know what that is.

Would it look goofy to have them border the seat in white tile and then place hexagon in center?

Can you just get anything and have it redone after closing?

Not a fan of Schluter...It looks so industrial to me.

there are all kinds of trim pieces. enlarge my pic,,,does that black trim around my niche, look industrial? it comes in white and silver, just like that.

or, pick a small pencil liner to edge the seat and lay the hex inside of that. Does you white glass tile come in any liners or edge trim? use that line so the whites match.

Cardiac arrest!! lmao. man, Pink, how are you not strangling these buffoons? what kind of tile guy doesn't know how to do a Schluter? you just lay it in the thinset and butt your tile against it.

get the flat one w/barely exposed side Scheine.

Out shopping for suits (see Colbrans post for that back story :-/. Friend sent me this picture and OMG this whole shower is my biggest nightmare. Beveled tile wall and seat and curb with schluter please make it stop. I’ll be back once home phone battery is at 10%. They emailed me again saying i need to make a choice of the beveled will be installed.

I think you'll probably be happiest with your hex tile and a flush trim (VERY THIN) of carrara...You'll see, in time, whether the tile setter was good enough to avoid standing water (very tricky..)

Just my opinion.

oh hell,,ok,,,yeah,,,not liking that at all! sheesh (for the record, that is NOT the Schluter trim I was referring to!)

before he sets the tile on the bench, (after you've told him to slant it) put your own level on there and see if it is. if it's not, you better be on him when he sets those tiles to build up the back a little bit so it slants forward.

Okay they are definitely fixing the pitch of the seat. That was presented in a report by our independent inspector who will be re-inspecting as we go and they signed off on doing everything in that report.

Beth I'm not in love with the Schluter. It would be a solution but I just don't love it enough to use it.

That picture I posted above of the nightmare shower. OMG look how the seamless glass sits on those tiles. I DONT WANT THAT!

If I use the hexagon on the curb and seat will the seamless surround sit like that on it?

Penny we have already signed off on the tile and glass surround upgrades. We tried to just have them not do any of the upgrades and do something standard and they refused since we already signed off on the upgrades. I thought of letting them do the tile and then after closing just pulling it off the seat top and curb and hopefully not damaging walls and having solid surface installed but the shower surround will have to be redone and that is a huge expense we would be paying for twice.

pink,,your shower glass company will prob sit the glass in a track? i'm not sure how they do that.

the hex tile you're getting, do they have other sizes in that color? any trim pieces? no bull nose pieces in a subway tile or 12x24 pieces? i'm thinking you could do a border w/the same type of tile.

,'your shower glass company will prob sit the glass in a track? i'm not sure how they do that.'

Even if its frameless/seamless?

the hex tile you're getting, do they have other sizes in that color?

I was wondering about this too. I was thinking maybe doing it in a larger format on front and top of seat might actually be pretty. I will find out.

i'm thinking you could do a border w/the same type of tile.

Border in the hexagon or border in subway?1 Like

border in a thinner subway. or forget the subway. do the have 12x12 or 12x24 tiles? you could cut them to any size for your border on the edges of the bench. hopefully they make these with a beveled edge. or maybe they have larger subway tiles? say, 3x12 or something, with the bullnose/bevel edge?

as for the shower glass,,,,i'm only guessing. call them and ask what they do.

After searching for two days I finally found a picture of the hexagon taken up over the curb. It looks like they just have the subway on the outside of it. then grout. Still can't find a picture of it on seat top and "water falling" down seat front.

and I see they used a Schluter metal edging on the curb.

I saw one of pennyround at they did over the curved edges of a niche. beautiful job.

i know it's prob asking wayyyyy too much of your tile guys to try curving the edges of the bench so they could do a wrap w/the tile..kind of like in these pics

kind of a bench. you could do the same w/hex

this is what I meant by doing a liner for a border.

of course, this would be so much easier. I still can't imagine them not doing this. it's easier, cheaper and quicker.

when I mentioned cutting larger sizes of your marble look tile for borders on the bench, I thought something like this:

On the last picture I think if the border is white and then I use the carerra hexagon where the have the black rocks it could work. I think it would also be less jarring that this example simply because its all mostly white.

Is there Schluter in that curb? When I zoomed in I thought all I saw was grout.

I just looked again maybe white schluter?

yes, very thin,,,either white or the white metal. it's there. they also did a square liner on the bench, of the same white tile.

Beth the tile people are suggesting a Jolly Strip. What the heck is that? Looked it up and it looks like Schluter ? Same thing different name?

the Jolly is a Schluter. it's just one of the models.

The Jolly profile is designed to finish and protect tile edges on walls and countertops. It is ideal for creating decorative transitions on walls. Jolly can be used to finish the edge of a tiled backsplash or the edge of a bathtub surround. Jolly has an integrated joint spacer which ensures a uniform grout joint between the tile

Will look like this once installed. find out the profile edge and tell them you want the thinnest.

i used two diff kinds in my bathroom, ,,the one around my niche and accent on the wall, and one on my floor between two tiles.

Looks a little less noticeable than a schluter. Is it rounded /bullnosed? We may be getting somewhere. Although just found out they ordered cabinet hardware that I’d never finalized and it’s not what i want. Sigh......

the jolly is Schluter. they have many different profiles. some are rounded, some are thin and square like I've shown. go to their website and look at the options,,,but the jolly, w/the thin edging, should work.

can you cancel the hardware order?

Working on the hardware situation. Even the finish ordered is wrong. So frustrated!

deep breath. I'm sure you will straighten it out. just keep an eye on everything else.