I've bought plants like that, where they are really TALL and very LEGGY. But those have a great start, and they probably will come back shorter next season. Reason being... A lot of vendors will pack the plants in their growing area very tightly sometimes, because even they don't have infinate space, so they often will grow straight UP, because that's where the space is for the plants at that time. NOT a bad thing. For instance, I've gotten a good number of plants from Hallson Gardens and Green Mountain that are tall and leggy, and when they come up in my garden the next season, they will have more 'elbow room' so they explode OUTWARD. They are shorter, but not worse off at all, they are stockier, and more robust-looking, as opposed to leggy and 'gangly'. It all works itself out. Those are nice plants you got! Watch 'em bust outwards next season! : ) Cheers, Don B.

I had an experience in recent months where I offered to help my friends do some work on their house. After a visit one evening where we discussed dreams they had for their house, I offered to come help them work on a project. They were initially surprised and thought I might be just talking, but I maintained I was serious. We spent a week working on their house and they were really pleased with the results. I'm so happy we did that, because it turns out it was just the thing that inspired them to start working on other projects. And they're really happy and feeling good about it. So, I like to think that being a little pushy can be helpful, but I would only do it if I knew someone very well. I've had friends and neighbors over who tell me our place looks nice and how organized I am. They ask if I would help them do this or that, and I tell them I'd be glad to do it and to just call me and make plans. It's come up more than once with some, and I've repeated my willingness to help. But I leave it at that, because it's not my job to make their project a priority. This last experience annoyed me. I had someone, more of an acquaintance, ask for help with selecting something for their home. They were at a loss for ideas and asked me what I thought. I made a couple of suggestions, and the person actually responded with "ew". Yes, ew. Not, "I don't think I'd care for that" or something polite in response. I decided I didn't need to knock myself out for "ew". Tina

Adella, "The kids don't respond to mom's method of discipline (which appears to be screaming) because there is no consequence." You're exactly right. And by saying that she wanted the kids while dad was less than enthusiastic does not let dad off the hook for care, it's just saying when a person wants something so bad, and keeps having children although she is overwhelmed and completely stressed does not make sense to me. In essence, she did this to herself. It makes it hard for me to have sympathy. The dad has an gold-fashionedh approach to the whole thing, which is, eI go to work, you take care of the kidsf. When I was a SAHM my daughter was fed and bathed by the time my husband got home from work. He did not come home to a dirty house, a frazzled wife and hungry, whiny children. IMO, this is disrespectful behavior on the part of the mother. Mom2emall, gI have to say that being a SAHM can be more frustrating than juggling a full-time job and kids.h While I agree a SAHMfs job can be frustrating, and in your case perhaps it was emoref frustrating, I donft think that generalization works. I go to work at 6:00 every morning, get off at 2:00, pick up my daughter, go home, do homework, get a snack, get her dressed for her sport, drive her to her sport, bring her home, make dinner, do an activity with her, eat dinner, clean up, bathe her, get her into PJs, read a story, attempt to do laundry and clean, spend an hour or so with my DH and go to sleep. When I was a SAHM, I could go to the park, call another SAHM on the phone, have playdates, etcK to get adult interaction. Popi, Amazingly, the three kids are slender. But the mom is pretty overweight. The mom once saw some pictures I took on the way to her house. She said, where did you take these? And I said, on the side of the road. It was beautiful, and we¡¦d been in the car for a while, so I stopped and we took some pics and looked around. And she said, I wish I could do something like that, I wish I was like that. I think a lot of her issue is not being relaxed enough to have a good time. She is not coping. She thinks she has a really hard life. She complains about everything. I personally don¡¦t see where the issue is, except that she¡¦s a spoiled brat too. Daisy, You¡¦re right, it¡¦s a great teaching experience. I talk with my DD about how their relationship is and how I don¡¦t want to do that with her, the cycle of whine/yell. It¡¦s good, but it¡¦s hard to get through it when it¡¦s happening. ¡§There are a few people who won't be offended if you point out their children's misbehavior, but those people are very, very rare. I think you're right, there's no way your husband can tell his friend without offending him and damaging the friendship.¡¨ Thank you Daisy. This is exactly why I wrote the post. I don¡¦t think there is a way to say it, but I thought I might be wrong º My point with this, ladies, was not to dissect their parenting, blame the mother, or condone any behavior by the father. I know that they have marriage issues too, and I don¡¦t think I can even go there! I don¡¦t want to sever the relationship, I am willing to endure hanging out with a woman I don¡¦t particularly like because I know my DH and his friend are very tight and I respect their friendship. I don¡¦t have to be her BFF, I just have to be civil for a weekend every three months or so. I¡¦m sure you all have family or acquaintances that you must endure for defined periods of time throughout the year. I just wanted to know, (and maybe I shouldn¡¦t have included any other information, but I was so frustrated!) do you think there is any way to tell him his kids are brats? I don¡¦t think so. My DH wanted to know, because they¡¦re driving him crazy too, and he loves his friend.

Going by what Lazypup said,and i do agree with her. I have one very best friend,and we have been each others best friend for almost 50 years.We have never had an arguement. I first met lupe when we were transferred to Ca(DH was a marine)When we got our first apt she lived next door.We both had young kids then,she 6 girls and me 3 boys and i was pregnant with DD. We first spoke over the back fence as we were both hanging clothes,no dryers back then.We hit it off right away.We baby sat for each other,when needed,helped each other out whenever we could.And believe me she was there for me a lot when dh was deployed to viet nam. Our relationship grew over the years and is still blossiming.She has been there for me and i for her thru thick and thin,sickness and in health,and everywhere in between.We still go out to lunch off and on ,we invite each other and our families to each others family functions,and our kids have always called each other cousins,and still do.They greet each other with "Hi Cuz",and a hug. She truly is a best friend!! I have 6 others that i have been very close to for almost as long and one even longer,but most of them don't live close by.lupe and i still live just blocks apart,we both have grand and greatgrand kids now. Kathi