"This is a stupid discussion anyway, trying to compare American-made cars to foregn-made cars. Maybe you missed the picture here. Why does the "Big Three (Ford, GM, Chrysler)" keep laying off workers, shutting down plants, losing billions of dollars a year in profits while say Toyota is building more factories in the US, hiring American workers and making billions in profits? It can also be applied to just about every manufacture in the US. Briggs & Stratton and Kohler = Losing out to Honda and Kawasaki. Harley Davidson = Just pick a Jap bike. Polaris, Artic Cat, Bombardier/Can AM = Again pick a Jap ATV or PWC. Why can Ford, GM or any other US company make a profit paying US wages? The Japs are. Oh and by the way Wally. You stated, "Do some research. You'll find that none of the Jap. plants have union labour.." Sorry to inform you. But the Buffalo WV Toyota plant is about 10% union. The other 90 % of employees learned their lesson watching a stamping plant here in Charleston. The plant had a huge contract with Ford and GM making body panels. Both got fed up with not having a reliable source of parts due to stupid strikes by the UAW. One of which lasted for over a month because the Lawn service the company hired to mow and trim the grass was not union. Ford and GM canceled their contracts forcing the place to shut down putting over 600 out of work for they could not get a contract even if they offered to stamp parts for free.. BWM has since bought the building and has spent millions updating it and have since hired 250 on their first round. And not the first employee has a desire to join a union. For the ones that had worked their before have better wages and benefits than what they did when working under the union. They are thousands of Coal miners here leaving Union jobs to go to work for Non Union mines. For they pay the same wage and have nearly the same benefits. But not having to pay the unions a wad every month. They actually take home more money.

I am new to posting on the marriage forum. But this is my $.02. In every marriage, there is give and take. I can see that you have a very busy life and it was that way before you married. I am not sure that you and DH didn't have different ideas about what happens after you get married. I kind of get the feeling that you weren't expecting much of a change and that DH was expecting a lot. First, if you were doing these things before you got married, then DH knew what he was getting into. Second, if you were doing all of these activities, How did you have time to date the man who became your DH? You made time for him before, right? You need to make sure that you still do that now. Just because you are "married" doesn't mean that it will be there if you aren't. Married should be a verb and not an adjective. That is when the real work starts. Finally, IMHO, if you got married and want to stay married, it is time for a sit down meeting to hash out what both of you are expecting. If you knew enough to marry him then DH's expectations should not seem to come from no where, meaning that you should have noticed that some of these have been coming for a while. It is really hard to be in the adjustment phase of being married. No one really lets all of the baggage hit the floor until they are sure they are staying. You have to sort out what every one wants and still make sure you don't lose yourself in the process. Honestly, I think you are having a case of "I wish I were still there 'itis". Basically, you are still mourning a part of your life that you had to step away from. It is not unusual to miss your single life. I know for a fact that I did. It isn't wrong, but if you wanted to marry DH then, there were reasons and do they still hold up? If marriage is something that is REALLY important to you, then you have to make sure that you are willing- not to put his needs first- but to make sure he is being heard and to try to make sure he is hearing you. If he is making you uncomfortable about seeing your single friends every week, maybe you should compromise. Could you invite them over, on the week when the SD is not there of course? Being married means that he should be at the center of your life, not your whole life, and you will need to encourage him to meet you half way. Don't give up the things you love, don't lose your passion for life, but don't leave him behind like a long date you wish was over. He obviously still wants to be around you. Have you thought about why you don't have the need to be around him as much. I am pretty sure you saw him more when you were dating than you are now if he is complaining. Maybe you need to look more closely at the situation. Please feel free to tell me if I am way off base... I am a big girl, I can deal with it. LOL.

Tammy's answer notwithstanding, it is true that once you have children, THEY are your primary responsibility and job for the next 18-20 year. Yes, some people do get remarried, and have successful blended families, BUT you've had ample warning that this woman is NOT going to be a good person to have you your son's orbit. As a responsible parent, you have NO busines, NO right exposing your precious child to someone who isn't going to be a positive influence on him. I'm sorry to say, for the next 2 decades, you are going to have to put HIS well-being ahead of your own interests. That's what good parents do--whether they're a solid married couple or single parents. Before you date, or bring someone into your life, you need to think long and hard about how they will impact upon your child. This relationship isn't one that's going to be healthy for your son--you have to end it for that reason. That's the bottom line. Know that's probably not what you wanted to hear, but it's what any truly good parent will tell you.

I would just like to stick to the subject at hand and not add unnecessary paranoia's to my ALREADY stressful situation. To "ReadingLady" - thank you. It's hard not to stick to the facts when emotions are involved. I've known this young man since he was 5 years old and I see the genuine love he has for his father and vice versa. I don't want to see anyone suffer emotionally and both of them are suffering a great deal right now. I watched my oldest daughter (age 31 from another marriage) go through the same thing. Unable to grasp the reality of being a self sufficient adult and making one mistake after another and NEVER, EVER sticking to anything. Her father and I had to stop the madness by saying to her, "you're on own." You get no more chances with us until we see that you are functioning as a responsible adult. She is now a college graduate working as a Paramedic, married, and just financed her first car on her own and is preparing to buy a house. Kicking her to the curb was the most heart wrenching thing I have ever done and I spent many a night crying. I went into this whole thing with the fantasy that we could all be this happy blended family, but he came with a TON of baggage. His mother is a recovering alcoholic (majority of his childhood was watching her drink), his father was only there for the summer months so there was never any parenting being done by either one! He's got this "The World Owes Me Something" attitude and the "United States is Stupid - The Rules Are Stupid". I tried telling him very early in the game that if he is caught with marijuana and convicted of possession, financial aid STOPS. You'll never be able to attend any university in the U.S. unless you pay for it out of your own pocket. His response? "That's just ridiculous." Now, he wants to attend a university in England because he does have dual citizenship. He believes that all he has to do is write a "KILLER" essay and Oxford will accept him just based on life experiences. His only long term job was in Bermuda as a personal trainer for 18 mos. He's one of those kids that if you're telling a story about something you've seen or somewhere you've been or something you've done, he'll top it with his on tale and will outshine anything you said. If we're watching T.V., he'll come in the room with his guitar and start playing. If he tells a story and everyone is sitting, he'll stand and become loud and animated while speaking. Always has to be the center of attention. He seems relatively smart, but it's just b.s. that he's read off the internet. No education. MANY, MANY opportunities to achieve higher education, but has blown each and every one - including the opportunity here. The LIST is what I will stick to and no other thing. It's simple and true. Thanks again!