My Greyhound has a bed in the corner of my wife's and my bedroom. The dog is the only female in the room that does not snore.

"Maybe I am naive, though."

If you have never had a dog, that's probably a reasonable assessment :-) It's much like having your first child.........there are issues and idiosyncrasies that pop up that you would never imagine!!

However, I am of the firm belief that there is a dog for every household. It may just take some time and research to find the one that best suits you and your family.

There are some misconceptions that can be cleared. Not all dogs require a lot of exercise - many are just couch hounds/lap dogs that are happy to laze around most of the day snoozing, snuggling or amusing themselves and only need a few daily walks for exercise and to relieve themselves. That's more a matter of breed or temperament selection. And if properly trained, there is no "scratching at the door in the middle of the night" to go potty. YOU set your dog's elimination schedule and that last walkabout of the day right before your bedtime, will ensure your dog sleeps through the night just like you do.

I am not a big believer in crating beyond the puppy stage. My current dog was only crated as a puppy during the day when he accompanied me at work or if I had to leave him alone for an extended period. At night, he slept on his own bed. Now as an 8 y.o. adult dog, he is never crated. As I am now self-employed, he is with me during the day and generally comes with me in the car when I drive around for business. And he has the riding shotgun - guarding the car routine down pat!! About the only time he gets left alone is if I go out in the evening - dogs in restaurants or at the movies are generally frowned upon :-))

He also has a best friend - my 12 y.o. cat. They play, groom and snuggle together and are usually inseparable. I also housesit my upstairs neighbor's cat, three weeks out of each month and the transition to adding a second cat to the household, at least temporarily, has been incredibly smooth.

It really is a matter of finding the right dog for your specific situation and then training them to adjust to your lifestyle wrt to sleeping arrangements, potty breaks, exercise periods, leaving alone, introducing to existing pets, etc. But it is vital to have everyone in the family on the same page!

I also want to add something. I LOVE napping with my cats!!! We've avoided sleeping with them at night because of my light sleeping, but also because I don't want my feet attacked during the night. For fire safety, we all sleep with our bedroom doors closed, and we don't keep a littler box in our room/bathroom.

But goodness, I love the furry snuggles. My cats follow me around like a puppy and I love it. They do spend some time away from me, but my one bonded cat is almost always near my feet. My other cat loves everyone, and doesn't seem to have a strong bond to any one person. I'm her main person, but likely only because I'm around the most.

I'd love a pet to be a bit more active with. I'm not super motivated to get outside, though I really want to go out for daily walks. I just never think of it, you know?

Do any of you have dogs that bonded with your kids and slept with one of them instead of you? Or am I destined to always be the mama?

That's one of the things I would suggest if you get one, having the dog sleep with one of your kids.

Dogs tend to choose their "person," I think. They love everyone, but I believe they generally have their special friend who they grow very attached to. For my one dog, it is my DH (even though I didn't meet my DH until about 1.5 years after I got the dogs).

B. just LOVES my DH and he follows him everywhere and snuggles with him and always wants to be with him, even though I feed B and do most of his care (my DH isn't really a dog person, he is fine with the fact we will always have them b/c I love them and he's very sweet and affectionate with them, but I mostly take care of them). So, your dog may decide one of your kids is "their person" even if you do most of their care.

Even if you are their "person," they should be fine to sleep w/ one of your kids. My dogs will sleep with my in-laws when they dog sit and it is no problem, or if my DH is sick and sleeps in a different bedroom for the night, they are both fine to stay with me.

I work from home. My DH surprised us with a dog about five years ago. We had one child in college and one in high school and DH travels often. I was NOT happy.

I have grown to love our dog but after she's gone I am not sure if I will approve of getting another. It's like having a toddler. She follows me around the house and is interested in everything I do. Are we going outside? Are we eating? Are you leaving? Can I have a treat? Will you pet me?

And this is a dog that is so sweet and good. She was a rescue dog and was very well trained so I didn't have to deal with that extra work. She doesn't bark or jump, is not a counter surfer :), sleeps peacefully outside our room every night, doesn't get on the furniture, doesn't shed too much.

Part of the issue is my personality. I just like to do my thing and be left alone. That doesn't happen with a dog around the house.

Our former dog was the polar opposite, Charlie, heaved a huge sign of disdain when we arrived home after work. She'd actually give us the side-eye and trot off to her bedroom. It was hard not to take it personally .

Our current one is a Velcro pup.

Velcro Pup. Exhibits A - C

Is that yours? Adorable:)

Yup. On three different days. And right now below. She's constantly stuck to me.

I grew up with a boston terrier (from age 7-19) who always slept in my bed. My Dad would not allow him in their bed. My parents had neither a real nor invisible fence, trained him to stay in the yard, but never 'fixed' him. So he made many cute puppies all over the neighborhood. That was in the 60's It was a very tame, low-traffic place. He never went on walks on a leash, just played with us kids both inside and out. My Mom fed him, let him out, as we did too, and I washed the windows/doors where his soggy nose had been. It wasn't a big deal. Of course if you're house-training him it is at first.

I got a boson terrier puppy barely 8 weeks old about 3 and half years ago--a lot of work at first. Now he's settled in. These dogs are all about routine. I walk him once a day except in summer, then maybe twice, and have a fenced in back yard, and he likes to jump up on the sofa and look out the window to bark at whoever is out there. And likes to play and get lots of loving attention. Saved me from a burglary a few months ago. I could have trained him not to bark but glad I didn't. I am so glad I got him. His eyes are really brown, don't know what is wrong with my photog skills. Here is my Beau Domino.

nannygoat, I think I'd cry if my dogs did that to me! I work from home, and my 3 are in my office with me all day long. My biggest boy, Riley, even shares my office chair with me, and believe me, it's a tight fit. But he wants to be snuggled in behind me.I took this over my shoulder one day.

All 3 sleep on my bed with me, and they cuddle tight for about an hour until I just have to move.

Before I go to bed, when I wake during the night, and when I first wake up, I am glad to not have to let or take a dog out. But when I'm fully awake, I still love the idea of having one. Even today, when it's miserable and sleeting out. I'd be OK with having to go for a walk!

"Our home office is right by our bedroom, and I think my younger cat sleeps in there at night. We have cat climbers in there, so that could be a great spot for a dog, I think! Maybe I am naive, though."

That is already established cat territory/safe place and if you disrupt that and put a dog in there you risk the cats acting out and doing things like urinating outside the litterbox, etc. you risk that introducing a dog at all. Not all cats are willing to go along with getting a dog so be prepared to deal with changes in your cats behavior as well as everything that goes along with raising a dog.

About going out in the middle of the night.....my pup has early stage kidney disease so I don't get to dictate whether or not she has to go out at night. Two nights ago, she needed to go out around 3am. It was raining and I couldn't find both of my slippers. So I took her out in one slipper and one flip flop.

My last dog also had bladder crystals and frequent Urinary tract infections. Later in life she had "doggie Alzheimer's" and was very restless at night.

You cant control everything.

If we did put up a fence, can I just open the door to let the dog out? Or do I need to accompany? We have a screened-in porch, and that would be the door I use. I don't let my cats outside, so no doggy door.

Re: safe haven for cats, that's a very good point. I make sure that we don't disturb their safe havens, like clipping claws there or other unpleasant things. We have a small cat door to the basement (they love it down there) that would allow them to hang out down there if they don't want to be near a dog. But, I'd specifically look for a dog that was fostered with cats. My cats are very affectionate with each other and love to romp and play. They never hide out away from people.

Depends.....we have coyotes where I live and they can jump a 6' fence. We also have skunks and opossums that come through the yard. So taking her out on a leash avoids a lot of potential issues.

I haven't heard coyotes here personally, but we definitely had them (and heard them) in my last town, which is only 20 minutes away.

I do want a dog myself - basically, a herding dog once I get my farm going. A corgi or an aussie, nothing huge. However, I do have four cats (three don't get along with the fourth, and vice versa, so I already have territorial spats going on here). I've never owned a dog, either. (My family had one until I reached age two, so no bonding opportunities...) I get along with some dogs, not with others - it's like people! Some you want to be around and others, eh....

I am trying to figure out when it would be best to introduce a dog. Certainly not now, but after I move this year.

It may change as they get older if they develop health issues, but I essentially never have to let my dogs out, nor do I have to specifically get up and get them out right away. You can get your dog on a schedule that works for you.

For example, we get up around 9 and then I give them a little breakfast (pumpkin and goat yogurt). We walk around 9:45 after I have my breakfast and they do their business. Then, at some point, they have an afternoon walk (usually occurs between 2 and 5) or on days when my DH works, I wait for him to come home and we walk after work. They do their business on this second walk. Then, at around 9:30 or 10, they are out just to the front lawn for the last potty and they're done. This schedule works and except on rare occasions if they are sick, we never have to go out other than this.

I haven't heard coyotes here personally, but we definitely had them (and heard them) in my last town, which is only 20 minutes away.

Then you can be 100% sure you will have them sooner or later if they aren't already skulking around.

If our yard was fenced I'd let my puppy out and just keep a watch. The bigger the dog, the less conscientious I'd be about keeping her right in sight. The smaller the dog the more I'd want to be right there. Raptors can take off little dogs and raccoons can really beat them up.

Around here the most frequent hazards are porcupine and skunk, especially at night. I think that's just a doggie owning hazard though.

I did not think it would turn out this way, but my husband said NO. No way, no how. They are "too messy and destructive." They poop and barf all over the house, and wake us up at 2am to pee.

I really thought he'd come around. :(

Integrating an adult dog with 2 cats can be VERY difficult even for experienced dog & cat owners.

Too often I see the cats given up to shelter/ rescues because they develop stress related inappropriate urination/defecation (pee/poop outside their litter boxes).

@pippiep - I'm so sorry you are running into resistance. There was a short period where our dog had to be taken out at night (and during his post-surgery recovery time) but incidents of "pooping" and "barfing" have been rare. Once in six years after the first month after puppyhood and barfing maybe twice a year (with notice). He's very good about signally when he has to go outside (he'll stare at the toilet in some cases).

So sorry. But, what about an adult well trained dog that needs a home. There are plenty out there.

ETA: Guarantee this:if you ever do get a dog, the dog will love your husband best, even though you do everything for the dog.

Some say that the person who first meets the dog is the one the dog bonds to forever.

This seems the case in both times here.

Yes, I had only planned on an older dog, not a puppy! 1 year minimum, but not too old so that my kids can have plenty of years left with the dog. I had planned to work with a trainer, too.

He says I already grumble about having to clean both litter boxes by myself. But that's only because I don't want to feel like the sole owner of the cats... and because we moved both boxes out of sight, so we don't scoop every day anymore. (I know, yuck. I used to scoop every time they used it!) Now I'm going to make more of an effort to scoop frequently and without complaint.

Pippiep, I'm sorry your DH is opposed but it does take a big commitment and maybe the timing just isn't right. I was in a similar situation, had wanted a dog for many years, finally had a home with a decent yard and my DH objected. Once he finally agreed, he'd have nothing to do with her until after she had been trained and he had time to bond with her. Now, he loves her as much as I do; it just takes time.

I was hoping to start the conversation about it, and maybe get one in the next year or two. Figure out logistics, responsibilities, etc. But now the conversation is shut down.

One of the big adjustments is that they usually need you to take them out. You can't leave the house overnight, or for 8-10 hours, like a cat, as most dogs may not be able to hold it in until you get back.

Our cats eat canned food, so we already stopped going for overnights or missing mealtimes. We rarely go out or go anywhere. I work from home. How long do dogs typically go between needing bathroom outings? I do go to work once a week and am gone for ~5 hours.

5 hours should be fine for a full grown dog. Not a puppy, they have to go more often.

All pets are unpredictable. My pup has been fully housebroken for almost 2 years and started having accidents again. You have to hope for the best AND be prepared for the worst.

Stick with your cats. A cat who is unhappy about the introduction of a dog into the household will let you know it very quickly, often by inappropriate peeing. And once that starts, it is VERY hard to cure. Add that to the fact that your husband is not on board, and you have two boys who are going to get involved with after school activities very soon, and a dog will become a burden not a pleasure.

EVERYONE must be on board for a pet to be introduced into the household! My DD's boys would love a dog - her husband is a SAHH and he says absolutely no. Since he's the one who would be the major caregiver, it really would not be fair to him. They have 3 cats whom he adores and who adore him.

I have owned cats and dogs my entire adult life. I have been catless now for about 13 years and will stay so - tired of furniture being scratched and inappropriate peeing. But I continue to own a dog (lost my best beloved one last week) and hope to continue to do so until the day I die. But I'm old and I live alone so it's MY choice.

I just have to think that, if you are solely responsible for the cat boxes and your husband and sons don't take their turns, things will probably be the same with a dog...especially if your husband is less than enthusiastic.

I'm sorry it hasn't worked out the way you hoped; things change sometimes, so maybe this will, too.

And I think you are entitled to grumble about the litter boxes. The others should take their turns - they are their cats, too.

My boys both have special needs. My older son is on the spectrum. I thought about applying for a therapy dog years ago, but found that the process here is very difficult.

My boys don't do after school things other than Scouts and therapy services. We won't ever be one of those active, always-on-the-go families.

I'm sorry he shut it down, but think it's best. You have a lot of responsibilities now and a dog is a very big one.

If you start walking and making conversation with the dog people, you'll find we're very friendly even if you don't have a dog and most dogs (except mine) love to see their special friends on their daily walks.

Taking 1929Spanish's suggestion one step further:

My neighbor is a former long-time dog-owner and doesn't desire the responsibilities inherent in pet ownership. She makes friends with local owners and offers to walk and/or play with their dogs for brief periods of time. She tells me that it's like being a grandparent--all the fun without the obligations. Unfortunately, mine is unreceptive, otherwise, I'd certainly lend Kirby to her.

Perhaps this would be a good option so that you and your boys could enjoy some benefits of canine companionship.

Do a lot of reading on breed types. You have some incredibly good adivice above. Also, is there a way to have a doggie door. Best thing I ever did (after years of having dogs) was to do a doggie door. Doggie doors are the best thing since sliced bread!!! We have had many different breeds of dogs, some are easier to train but higher in maintenance. Some are easier on maintenance and harder to train. Some are more demanding of attention and others more independent/standoffish. You have to find the happy median that works.

The only thing I have against rescue for first time dog owners is that these dogs come with history and I think it sad when a well meaning but inexperienced person adopts more than they are equipped to handle. The poor dog ends up back in the system. If you are not prepared to take the "whole" family to training classes give dog ownership a pass. The hardest part about training a new dog is training the family to train the dog.

Doggie doors are probably NOT a good idea if you have cats, as OP does.

Yeah, my cats are indoor only, so no doggy door. Plus we have coyotes around.

Oh my, a coyote door would not be good : )

We had a really unfortunate experience with a rescue dog. I went with what certInly seemed to be a reputable rescue organization that went so far as to do a home visit before approving us. I was extremely clear about what I could manage--needed to be house broken, good with kids, need no more than three miles walk per day and mangable on a leash. They pushed a Plott Hound mix they had.

The dog they placed with us was not housebroken, was poorly socialized and unpredictable with my four year old child, needed at least seven miles of exercise a day or she howled in the crate all night (crate was necessary because of the not house broken part) and pulled non stop and horribly on leash as well as being terrified of traffic noises.

After I worked with their trainer and a trainer I hired, they finally admitted that the dog they placed with us had lived her whole life in an outdoor kennel in a rural area. So they lied to me. I decided I just could not deal with every single one of my requirements not being met. When I returned the dog to the rescue, they had me bring her to an adoption event. I feel quite sure they were going to try to place her again right then and there.

It was really quite dreadful.

A couple of years later we got a golden retriever puppy from a reputable breeder. He is very sweet and a lot of work. It is way more work than a cat. For the first year, think about the same amount of work as a kid. And a dog also means that when your kid has a day long baseball tournament in the next town over you have to make arrangements. Cats, you just leave, dogs, need to be taken care of. personally, I'm not doing it again. This dog is five and in good health so I expect we have five or so more years left with him. After that, no more dogs.

Upon reflection- I'm going to echo others, in that an older rescue dog may not make a good first-time dog. I've also had a dog who had unusual needs due to his history- he was 11mo- and had anxiety due to it, however I'm home all day most days, and he finds refuge in his crate/meds when needed. He's also 70lbs, thin! A puppy is fine, but an older dog I'd be inclined to find a good friend re-homing where you know the only real problem is "we don't have time" or "my family member passed and no one else can take him" rather than an unknown which may possibly be bad.

I'm hesitant to generalize as my rescue agency has made many excellent matches with older dogs and adopters. However, we work carefully with them and provide guidance and support, if needed.

All dogs require a certain amount of sacrifice, labor and love from everyone in the household. At this time, any dog does not seem appropriate for you and the feline family members.

Yes you reminded me Nanny. I should have been more clear on dogs with history and adoptions for the inexperienced. I was targeting the local dog pound type places. Not saying that is always bad either but many of these dogs have history and that can add another layer. The extra layer is something experienced dog people can handle a little better. We once adopted a beautiful abused long coat Retriever from the Pet Mobil. She was sweet to us, her canine brothers and sisters but would out of the blue try to kill other dogs. It was weird. She also did not like men in hats. We had her for twelve wonderful years but she had to be watched.

Some if not most of dog rescue organizations that specialize in specific breeds can be great and are my favorite. I went to one such place when adopting my Rottweiler. They only did Rottweilers. We had a very detailed home inspection plus I had to bring my other pets in so they could observe the interaction. Before that I had filled out a form where I described the temperament I was seeking. We got exactly what we were looking for. What a perfect fit and loving dog. Most of breed specialty rescue organizations also have dogs who like and have been around cats if one is looking for that. These type of rescue organizations take the time to make a good fit. They really know the dog.

My last adoption was from a rescue group who specializes in dogs that have been sick and or were unadoptable due to behavioral issues. Their days were numbered. My little Brussels/Yorkie mix had been kept in a crate with a sibling with no socialization, filth and not much care. He was sick and would poo and pee all over anyone who held him. However, I was filled in with all the problems and knew what I was getting into. What a loving little character this dog is now. He still has some fear issues when being walked and goes insane when a car passes us but is improving all the time.

I'm now down to two.

Justterrilyn, thanks for clarifying. I'm so glad that you decided to adopt your pup in spite of his issues and provide a wonderful and loving home for him.

"Saving one dog will not change the world, but surely for that one dog, the world will change forever."

Pip, this might be a good dog breed for you, family and your cats. Sometimes they have a bit of a mix and are not always 100% one breed but for a pet that doesn't matter. Different regions are on site.

Rescue

http://www.cavalierrescueusa.org/

Or, for big bucks...

http://marketplace.akc.org/puppies/cavalier-king-charles-spaniel

I have them bookmarked already. ;)

Now I want one.

egads, those pictures!!!! Maybe I should print those out and start leaving them around the house...