Thank you all for the help identifying this. I'm thinking I'm going to try to get rid of it - would garden experts agree that this is one I shouldn't feel bad about getting rid of? FataMorgana- when you said the early leaves don't always look like mature leaves.... Any chance that my giant collection of "little spreaders" that is popping up with on pairs of opposed leaves is just a pre-woody-vine version of this? Thank you all again for the help- one down five hundred to go! :-)

Hey Tiffany, Here's what our grower says: E. oxypetalum has a more acute leaf tip, whereas E. hookeri has an oblong or rounded leaf tip. E. oxypetalum generally has a more deeply crenate leaf margin and the teeth are more rounded. E. hookeri has slightly sharper teeth on the crenate margin. That said, growing conditions (light, humidity, amount of water/fertilizer received) can really alter the plant's appearance. He also says the flower is more of a tell-tale differentiating characteristic here. I hope this helps. Let me know if you need more info. ---Justin Costa Farms

I am also tempted to say Kalanchoe. I am not familiar with that genus, though, so I won't be much help there. What you can do, however, is to improve the soil and light. For soil, you could mix together 60% perlite, and 40% cactus and succulent soil. Roughly what location are you in? Right now, I would give your plant as much light as possible (sunniest window, etc.)

That looks to be correct. Despite being a poisonous weed, it's quite striking (I've seen it myself).