Don't forget, in a lot of instances, hubbies enjoy menopause along with us. I started with the first hints in my early 40's, and it took maybe 5-6 years to get to the end of that particular stage of life for me. Sure there were hot flashes, the cranky moments, BUT there were also the testosterone surges. DH and I had some of the most frequent, and innovative 'togetherness' in all our 37 years, during that span of time. He often enjoyed menopause with me 4-5 times a day, most days of the week (it's a wonder the poor guy could get up in the morning to go to work). On the more serious side, I guess I was lucky--my husband is pretty well-informed about the human body, and was pretty understanding (although, I'm sure the fringe benefits helped him overlook some of the rougher patches--LOL). I do agree, that as women, we need to get back to being a little more practical. Menopause is NOT a sickness--even though it's often treated as one. It's a normal and natural part of life. Something everyone will go through if she lives long enough. It may be slightly uncomfortable at times, but it's temporary. I think it's a shame that so many women have been told that menopause is something they should fight, should be 'treated' for with drugs, etc. Hey, my point of view? I had my own little furnace. It was nice to know that if I got cold in the winter, in a few minutes, I'd be warm as toast. Not saying I wasn't a witch (sp--LOL) at times, but I refused to look at it as anything more than the next adventure of life.

I went through this for a long time....major PMS symptoms from hell for weeks and weeks at a time; until I was practically begging for my period. For years I think I spent more time PMS than not. As I got further along in perimenopause, I had meno symptoms at the same time as all the PMS! So I was bloated, very sore boobs, cramps, sweating, hot flashes, pimples, tired, moody, couldn't sleep....haha! I'm SO glad that's just about over, though I had about 8 years of this cr*p. A low-estrogen pill might help with regulating your period...none of the herbal remedies have been proven to help with much other than hot flashes (I tried them all, for years...I didn't notice any difference except I spent the money on them) but it wouldn't hurt to try.

Thanks for your reply Catherine. The really bad bloating is mainly just during the period. I know alot of people have bloating at this time, but the kind I get is NOT normal. I'm not on meds, and dairy and wheat don't seem to affect me other times of the month. I forget the various tests I had, but I was put on a few meds to see if they helped. I broke out in a rash all over so I stopped them. I had a minor surgery in May where they put a laparscope down my throad to see if they could detect anything and it came up negative. They seemed to think it had something to do with digestion. It doesn't. So, at this point, the doctor wants to keep giving me various tests so she can rule out things. She hasn't a clue what it could be. Last month besides the bloating, there was pain on the left side just below my ribrage; this month it was on the right side. I will make an appt with the GYN for an ultrasound, but it would be great if she could do it while it's happening. I'll work on that. Thanks again.

I am not sure how old this forum is but it seems that not too many read some of the posts here. Anyway, I think what you are going through is pretty normal for peri..I am 48 and my periods have suddenly changed as well. I just got over mine too and it feels as if it is on its way again. I also get the bloating, cramping, irritability, fatigue, and on and on..OH and did I mention nausea??? When was the last time you had your annual check up from your OBGYN? I doesn't hurt to get whatever is bothering you checked out just for peace of mind but I wouldn't worry too much because irregular periods are a sure sign of peri-menopause. Mine are now coming later and later but as soon as it is over I feel like it is coming again!! As for your swollen tender breast,is it just the one breast?