I am a few weeks shy 65 and bringing up a Rottweiler puppy. LOL No I don't recommend this. It is a lot of work and dedication. When she is mature I will raise one more dog from puppy hood. After that I will go the rescue route.

IF your parents have a house and a yard I would suggest a larger dog. As people age we tend to have physical issues come up that we don't expect. Even if healthy now we will at some time experience hearing impairments, visuals impairments and mobility issues , however mild relatively speaking. Small dogs are easily stumbled over. A large dog lets you know it is there. As long as one can throw a stick or ball a lab is entertained.

The issue seems to be your mom wants a "baby" and your dad wants a dog. I vote for the dog.

It sounds like each of your parents has a different point of view but the reality is three years have passed without another dog coming into the house, I think that tells the story. I'd stay out of it.

They are not taking care of the dog as well as they should is what I know, we would definitely need a lot more info before my parents would take the dog but we have to get over the hurdle of size before that happens. My folks own their own home and have just under an acre of yard. Both parents care for the dog but traditionally mom feeds and deals with the grooming, makes the vet appointments and notices health concerns. Mom came to me to look for a new dog I have been waiting for her to make the decision and want to help guide to make good choice for both as this is the last dog they will have, and there will only be one dog. Mom figures they will be in the house for the next 10 years or so depending on how life goes. I am where the dog will live if they can't take care of it, and I will take care of anything on four legs. Any other thoughts on small vs large vs med good bad and ugly....

I like big dogs. My first two dogs were Irish Setters. My last dog was 48 - 50 lbs (a Golden Retriever mix we named JD) and for me, that was perfect. If anyone had told me how much easier it was to have a medium size dog rather than a large one, I never would have believed them. When she died most unexpectedly at age 10, and after several months grieving, I decided to look at our local shelter for another dog, which is where we had gotten JD but they had mostly pit bulls......sweet dogs but not what I wanted. I also had seen a Goldendoodle at the vets while there I remember saying to his owner that he was awfully cute, but I didn't want another dog that could see and reach the kitchen counters. Been there, done that with the Setters. That being said, I wound up with a standard goldendoodle. She was suppose to be between 50 and 55 lbs. She's 65 lbs. We love her dearly, she's a great dog but if I had it do over again I would have gotten a dog around 40 - 50 lbs. I am 78...Georgy is 6. She's manageable but strong. I would recommend staying in the 40 - 45 lb. range. A nice compromise between mom's small dog wishes and dad's big dog wishes. And yes, now that dad is retired, he will take a much more active part in dog's life. DH was never a dog fancier but he loves, loves, loves Georgy. Walks her, feeds her, etc. I am on the go a lot with my lady friends.....bridge, golf, lunches etc. so she's great company for him.

I am 75 and recommend a small dog. Toy poodles do not really shed, so that will alleviate keeping up with ridding the house of dog hair. They are also great cuddlers. And, because of their light weight, would be easy for elders to pick up the dog, if necessary. Poodles are very smart dogs, too.''

I know what I am going to say will create dissension here. But, I do not recommend a dog from the pound. From several experiences of adopting animals from the pound, I can say with true personal experience that the animals I rescued were terribly thwarted mindwise; they were mean and sometimes vicious for no reason. I had one cat who would run and jump on my back and dig in his claws while I was sewing. I learned to be afraid of that cat. Anyway, just my thoughts. And your parents certainly don't need to have to deal with something like that.

IME, rescues want larger dogs to have a fenced-in yard. In your area that might not be the rule as it is here.

If they're used to smaller breed dogs and your mother strongly prefers, I think she should have that weighed the most.

Most of all, physically it is just easier to care for a smaller dog. With our beloved dogs, caring for them as seniors became challenging, but we're young enough to handle lifting and carrying. That won't be the case forever, so there will come a time that I think I won't be the right owner for a larger dog.

I would recommend no more than 30 pounds and probably less. My previous furbaby was a 50 lb. border collie cross. At 14 years old she developed back trouble. Luckily it was on the weekend when my daughter was around because I couldn't lift her to take her to the vet. My husband had a stroke so couldn't lift her either. They got her back on her feet luckily. It didn't become a problem, but I had nightmares about her needing to go to the vet and my not being able to lift her. As much as I would have loved a medium to large dog I got a small dog from a rescue that I knew I would be able to pick up. I've always been very happy with my rescue animals. You'll probably have to do some searching for a smaller dog unless you want a chihuahua. That seems to be mostly what they have at least in my area.

I'm 66 and I would recommend a small to medium dog. If your Mother does most of the work caring for the dog then I feel her opinion should carry a little more weight. Your parents are active and healthy now but will they be able to pick up a 70 + pound dog in the coming years if necessary? If they're walking the dog will they be able to keep it under control if a rabbit runs in front of them? I can tell you that I had a beautifully trained Rottie. But one day I opened the front door to take him for a walk and a rabbit jumped out in front of him and before I could say anything he leaped and I want flying - he stopped immediately, but it was enough to pull me off my feet.

We've always had large dogs - 2 German Shepherds, 2 Black Labs and 4 Rottweilers. We currently have a 65 pound Black Lab, a wonderfully sweet dog - but Labs are heavy shedders, year round. This one sheds more than 3 rottweilers put together. I vacuum the kitchen every day to stay on top of the dog hair. She has a bad back and can't jump into our car - so I have to pick her up. Our next dog will definitely be smaller.

There are dog breeds that are bigger than a Shih Tzu but smaller than a lab - perhaps you might consider one of them. . My DH prefers larger dogs and doesn't care for what he calls 'accessory' dogs. But he also agrees that our next one will be smaller - something the size of a beagle, or one of the spaniels ( Brittany, Springer, cocker). There are also quite a few terriers that are medium sized.

I think it is very nice of you to do this but I think they should be the ones to pick out the one that works for them.The final decision to get a dog or not should be theirs, they know what they want. It made me think of my neighbors. Their kids got them a Jack Russell puppy when they retired to the country. Not a good fit. They were not the active type at all and that dog was the most active I have ever seen. Nice dog but always bouncing off the wall. And it kept getting out and running all over the neighborhood. They never did warm up to that dog. After 5 years, when they decided to move back to the city, they gave the dog away to one of the kids.

I think temperament and personality is more important than size. But if you want my opinion based on experience, I think medium (15-20 lbs) is best. You don't want too tiny that they may be tripping over them because they get under foot. And not too big that the dog would knock them over or they can't control it. I broke my hip in 2009 and have Parkinsons and am 64. With my disabilities I could not handle a big dog and the thought of a tiny dog scares me. I see another broken hip. Even my 17 lb Dachshund can get underfoot at times. I can't even imagine how much more it would be with 4-8 lb dog. They are at the age when physical problems may start to appear.

I really really love my Australian shepherds, and I've had chows, collies, ACD,german shepherd, (counting mom's dog) pomeranian, chihuahua, and havanese besides.

Dogs are divided into about four groups, hunting, working, herding, and toy.

I would caution to stay away from hunting line dogs (they tend to have strong prey drive and this can make controlling them in situations difficult).

Little dogs (esp toys) tend to have attitudes/issues, and I'd say a number of them would qualify for clinically insane (the pom and the chihuahua were for sure).

The herding group is my favorite as you would see from the shepherds and collies.

The working dog line, is kind of a mixed bag, and I can't say they're bad...but do your research on the breed.

The Australian Shepherds are so easy to deal with because they want to please the owners, BUT they come with copious hair. I'm even reconsidering my next one based on hair balls everywhere all the time.

I would support a medium sized dog as both compromise and more healthy than the tiny toy dogs...dogs weren't meant to be that size and often have medical issues.....also purebred lines are more prone to cancers and other medical conditions. Been there, done that....cancer, drooping eyelids needing surgical correction, etc.

I have adopted two dogs from the pound, I unfortunately, have to agree that they tend to come with baggage that may never be resolved. My current stray (had it three years now) is a havanese, and I'm still working on full trust with this dog. You never know what they went through before...and usually not good.

I realize this isn't fully supportive for anything, but hopefully you will read it and consider some of the issues.

We are large dog people. At 60 we have an 85 pound malamute husky mix. He is only 5 so hope to have him for some time longer. He is quiter and less rambunctious than most of the smaller dogs I know. However, having cared for an elderly large dog -- a wonderful girl we lost two years ago -- it can get difficult and physically demanding. I'd suggest a medium sized dog as a compromise. Research breeds and find one that fits your parents personality best -- then check your area for breed specific rescues. Or even animal shelters because sometimes there are beautifully trained and socialized dogs that are surrendered by owners because of circumstances beyond their control. We rehomed our pup when he was 8 months old and and been raised by a loving woman who was going though a divorce and with two preschoolers and an elderly dog, and the pup, though beautifully trained, was too much for her at that time in her life. Best dog we've ever had, hands down, and we take him many places with us.

I am going to keep my answer really simple. SHE should choose the dog period. The size of the dog does matter. The bigger the dog the more exercise it needs. Also any breed needs to match her lifestyle. If she's not very active then lap dogs. They are usually the toy or mini breeds. Or a lazy breed like a bulldog...but they would still require regular exercise.

I love it! Dogs get 90% of the bed, humans get 10%.

I agree - they should choose the dog, not you. You know how when you're looking for a pet you just "know" when you meet it? I think your parents should be doing the looking. They'll know when they see and meet it. The pics of the dogs on the bed with your DH made me laugh. Good thing they gave him a sliver of the bed to sleep on.

I have been a very large dog person in fact several Great Danes, Afghan Hounds, Doberman, etc. Loved them all. But I said when we lost our last Dane after we moved here I could not do another big dog. I just physically could not handle a big dog. I had decided if we got another dog it would be small and able to easily travel with us. At the time we didn't have our RV. Now we do have an Rv and do travel. I had no idea what kind of dog to get.

God decided that for us. Shortly before our Dane passed away a little dog appeared on my doorstep. I checked with everyone and the vet for a chip. Nope it was homeless. My vet said that proves God has a sense of humor, you could only handle a tiny dog right now so it was provided.

Ihave to agree! This is a toy fox Terrier, I never knew about this breed. But it's without a doubt the best choice dog we could have been blessed with. She is a precious joy to us. She loves to travel, and travels like a champ. She absolutely loves the RV her home away from home. If we do have to leave her alone she is fine just like in our home. But she is so small she goes with us a lot.

These dogs are in general very healthy, some develop knee issues later, much like us lol. They have a fairly long life. They are NOT yappy dogs at all. She is a good watch dog though.

Iwould highly recommend checking out the toy fox Terrier breed, also called the American toy. Here'se a picture of her on one of our RV trips to the beach chilling. There's a great many rescues for this breed and mixed breed with it. According to the vet she is full blood from everything she can tell.

So you can see size here she is with her daddy looking for seashells.

http://www.akc.org/dog-breeds/toy-fox-terrier/

I do want to say, in contrast to Walnutcreek, we have had all great dogs. Two Irish Setters, a rescue and a Goldendoodle. The best of the lot was the rescue. Even people who came to my house that didn't like dogs, loved her. So, you never know. I do agree that Mom and Dad should pick out the dog. I went to several animal shelters several days a week for months and as difficult as it was to leave without a dog, you just know when a dog speaks to you that it's the match that was meant to be.

I think if they are willing to meet the dog and like it , they have nothing to lose by agreeing to a trial run of fostering it. Since it lives with seniors,, it's probably isn't going to require a whole lot of exercise, but if she walks well on a leash it will be no problem. Fostering is a great option to see if this dog size is too much or not. I like having a bigger dog for protection! Anyway you said your Dad is retired. He can certainly come along to vet trips. If for some reason he doesn't I'm sure you could assist. Most dogs don't go very often. I don't think it's any more difficult feeding a different size dog other than hauling the dry food. And you said you are willing to take the dog in if/when they might be unable to continue care. My mother is 82 and has been a widow for 2 1/2 years. For The last 2 years she had a 60 lb dog that was very well behaved and no problem. Doggie passed away last summer. Much depends on the dogs behavior and personality.

I'm wondering, if there was a somewhat bigger dog in your parents' home, if your Dad would be more willing to interact with it on its basic needs -- food, vets, walking... That plus now he's retired. I think both your parents have to pick out their dog together. Maybe a medium sized dog on a the lower weight end of the scale? That they BOTH would love to interact with?

IME, rescue organizations don't give you a dog to foster as a trial run. You have to qualify for fostering, which entails being available to show the dog to potential adopters.

It also may entail dealing with health, socialization and behavioral issues.

It is not for the feint of heart and not for anyone who is not 100% committed to the job of fostering.

Fostering is not a trial run to adopting, and should not be viewed as such.

They are two different things and while sometimes fosters fall in love with a dog and keep it, they are often out of the business of fostering.

Rescue organizations often run on very, very thin margins and are mostly volunteers. To vet potential fosters takes time and money, which one shouldn't usurp without the best of intentions.

Our yellow lab rescue is a gem who came off the rural streets of S.C. She was her foster's first charge, and her foster fell in love with her over the course of the 6 or so weeks she took care of her and brought her to adoption events.

If she decided to adopt our lab, she was done fostering. Rescues need a solid network to be the backbone of their organizations. Not one and done fosters who are in it to try on different dogs for size. Every single dog that they adopt to forever homes takes a village of selfless volunteers without whom these dogs would be doomed to euthanasia within days.

These dogs cannot afford weak links in the chain.

I'm not impugning the OP or her parents. I'm impugning the notion that anyone should offer to be a foster with the underlying intention to use that as a means to try dogs on for size.

You either want to foster, or you want to adopt. Do fosters adopt from time to time? Sure, but that often comes with a price that is to the ultimate detriment of other rescue dogs.

I hope this gives something to think about and thank you for reading about a topic I'm passionate about.

I'm sorry for Walnut creek's rescue experience, buy mine is the opposite. I have two rescues and both are the sweetest dogs in the world. A bichon and a standard poodle-not a mean bone in their bodies. My niece just rescued a little 7 pound mixed breed from a shelter and he also is a very sweet dog. So I think a rescue can be the way to go, depending on the dog. I also think your Mom should pick out the dog. Good luck!

We are nearing 60 and now have two big pit mixes, both adopted from the local shelter. I agree with the difficulty of controlling a big dog when a squirrel darts in front of us and my fur kids sometimes get excited and run right into my legs, nearly knocking me down.

I absolutely cannot pick up the 80 pounder to get him into the tub, but professional grooming isn't in my budget, so he gets extra treats to coax him in.

Before these big guys we had medium dogs, a husky mix and an American Eskimo, with good energy level but not too much for us at the time. They loved their walkies and were not difficult to reel in when needed. That American Eskimo (25-30 pounds) was really mentally unstable, yet he was the only one that didn't come from a shelter. We had to keep him away from children for fear that he would bite.

I think your parents will just click with a perfect dog for them. Good luck on the search!

I am going to be 77 next month. I would only consider a larger breed. They are much easier to care for than the smaller breeds. I have always had larger breed dogs, and right now have a chihuahua dog that has been living with me since 2007. She belongs to my grandaughter. I can personally tell you, she is more work, than having 3 larger sized dogs. I am currently looking for a puppy of my own, but, I want it to be another Basset Hound, which is short in stature, but, is actually a fairly large dog otherwise.

I am 69 and have dogs of all sizes. I recommend a small....mixed breed....rescued from a shelter. An older dog that is already house trained and would benefit from a good home, as most people who look for dogs want a purebred or a puppy.

I am just wondering why you are doing the work of finding them a dog. In my opinion your parents should be figuring out what is best for them. Whatever their choice they would then be invested in the process. Just my two cents

Joann

I agree with everyone who said your parents should make this decision themselves. I'm 72, and can't imagine wanting someone else to look for a dog for me. Ask anyone who has rescued an animal, and they will tell you how they made an immediate connection with a dog or cat and knew this was "the one." Plus the process of looking online these days is fun, albeit a little heart-tugging because of all the ones we must leave behind.

The issue of your dad wanting a larger dog and your mom saying no reminds me of my piano tuner. When I first met him he was in his sixties, and he and his wife had a cat. My cats loved him, and vice versa. Then his cat died, and his wife laid down the law: No more cats. He was sad about it then, and 15 or so years later, he's still sad. When he comes to tune my piano he looks forward to seeing my cats. My cast of cat characters has changed over the years, but his longing for a cat in his home has not. I've always thought that was terribly unfair.

Plus the process of looking online these days is fun, albeit a little heart-tugging because of all the ones we must leave behind.

******

It's overwhelming, really. Getting a puppy from a good breeder is all rainbows and unicorns compared to the sad and sometimes horror stories you read and encounter when looking at rescues.

There are too many people who do not view pets as we do.

ETA: my neighbor lost her dog about 2 months ago and she's getting her dog fix when she sees our doggies. I wonder if she'll get another...

The dog in question is living with its owners, not a rescue group. Ive never fostered a dog before, but did foster a kitten when a rescue group was in a desperate situation and looking for emergency fosters. I was looking for an adult cat but kitty had medial issues and the rescue needed him out of there due to no water or electricity after a hurricane,. When I took the kitten I told them I would definitely adopt if things went well with my senior dog and other cat. My dog 82 lbs (not the elderly dog I had then), on the other hand was adopted from a large rescue group set up at a Petsmart. We wanted a dog that was housebroken, good with kids, and good with cats. Anything else we would deal with. We picked a dog that according to them and his card met all 3 requirements. We also walked him inside and outside the store. Within 24 hours we realized-he was housebroken 100% at least, aggressive with kids, and chased the cats. It took a long time to iron out his issues. Much trial and error. It turned out he was aggressive towards dogs and people when leashed as well. Odd-he was great on a leash at Petsmart. My husband said many times he must have been drugged-I don't think so. Anyway, fast forward thank God for Cesar Milan tv shows!!! He became with great the kids but took much time and even their friends-came to join the kids in bed at sleepovers! It took quite some time to get there but so gratifying to see. Could bebetter with the cats, but they keep their distance and leave each other alone I don't regret getting him, we love him and fully trust him now, but I would have never intentionally brought a dog like that to my house with kids, Thats what I meant by fostering, We had no idea if we could bring him back, but regardless we signed papers to adopt him and we were going to 'fix' the issues but had no clue how. Anyway, its all worked out and I love that I don't have to worry about break ins, and he really enjoys the kennel with all day playtime with other dogs when we travel. The nice thing about your situation is this dog is currently with owners and I think would be willing to do a 'trial run'. Your parents would be the ideal loving owners is all works out. Its up to them if they want to consider this dog. Be sure to find out exactly why they are giving up the dog. Probably mobility issues? It would be nice if the the dog is taken in, to be able to see its former owners every now and then so they are at peace with a difficult decision,

I should qualify what I said about the process of looking for dogs online. Although two of my friends successfully adopted dogs from other parts of the country after seeing their pictures on the Internet, my version of "looking for dogs online" involves checking out the websites (or PetFinder listings) of shelters within driving distance. I'd want to connect with the dog in person.

large dog vs small dog? It all centers around what you have to deal with. It would make me insane to have a small yappy dog. Absolutely INSANE. Plus, around my friends dog, I have to always be watching where that little thing is. He's forever under foot. A tripping hazard, especially if someone were to already have balance problems. However, how sweet would it be to have a 10 pounder on your lap rather than an 80 pounder! When our old Golden reached the end stages, 4 or 5 times a day I had to wrap him in a sheet, toss it over my shoulder and haul him down the 4 steps into the backyard. He weighed 75 lbs. I'm not sure how much longer I could have done that. We also have two rescue mixes. One a lab mix, the other a hound mix. Both are great dogs but weigh about 60 lbs. I'm worried about getting them up and down the back steps when their golden years come.

I completely disagree about rescues being problems. Our rescues are well trained with good dispositions. I think any dog could become a problem for one reason or another but not simply because they came from the pound.

DH and I are also discussing this size thing. We have always been a Golden Retriever family. This is the 1st year in 38 that we have not had a Golden. He's almost ready to puppy hunt again but I'm (kinda sorta) wanting a small cuddle dog. Maybe a silver toy poodle. He can't imagine a poodle but he would absolutely fall in love. It's just his nature to love any animal. But yapping. I'm holding back. And it could get stepped on by the bigger dogs and get hurt.

Your mom should consider your dads wants too.

I agree fully with those who have said that you should not pick out a dog for them. Getting a pet is a very personal thing and I'm totally against giving a pet as a gift. The pet-owner-to-be needs to connect with the right animal, not have someone else choose it for them.

But I disagree with some of the comments here about shelters. Most animals in shelters are the result of people's irresponsibility. Many are strays. Yes, some have issues. But, in my experience, shelter pets are, by far, the best of the group.

I also believe that mutts are, in general, far better than purebreds. I've nothing against purebreds, but mutts rock!

She should choose a poodle.

Suzieque - Agree- anyone selling or adopting out a dog to you if you intend to give it as a gift or heaven forbid, a "surprise", is irresponsible.

I don't know that any reputable breeder or rescue would even consider it.

Mom needs to take the lead. The OP is well-intentioned and a great daughter.

I took care of Amber's rottweiler when she married and moved out. Baby had always lived here after she brought her home as a pup. That was the most well behaved dog I ever knew. She knew what you said to her and would do it. Very gentle for me to walk along side of her. I now have Izzi a Pomeranian and she is a great little dog too. She also listens and behaves. Is a good watch dog but not a yappy one. She does take grooming as most dogs do, but I take her to a groomer. I think Izzi will be my last dog as I am 81.

Sue and Izzi too

Grouping all small dogs into one group and labeled as Yappy little dogs is wrong and false! I have a very small dog,7 lbs, she is absolutely Not Yappy never has been, she will Bark when a dog should, someone at the door, someone pulling into the driveway, but never Yappy. That's like making a statement that any and all large dogs are aggressive, totally false. I have never had a problem with tripping over my dog she is intelligent she moves! Blanket statements are not fair.

Your parents need to make the decision. I think a big dog would work assuming it was well trained.

I have a Pomeranian. He is a rescue that we found injured on the side of the road. Poms are known as yappers, but mine doesn't really do that. He loves order and discipline. He does bark when people come to the door, but I allow that because I often don't hear the door bell and he is pretty good watch dog. He is really smart and understands a lot. He has trained us pretty well. He has even taught my husband to fetch treats. He is a neat little guy who very much loves us and wants to please us. He is good for me because I get a lot more walking done than I would otherwise.

raven - I apologize for getting under your skin calling all little dogs yappy. lol Please accept my apology. :)

Right or wrong I associate little dogs with yapping because those are my experiences. Just like so many people associate Goldens as sweet and friendly. That's not always the case, either.

I just don't want someone to miss out on a wonderful animal because of a pre conception. And the reason I am adamant about it is because I was one of those people. It was the best day of our lives when this sweet precious homeless baby showed up at our door, and I almost threw it away because I said oh no not a little Yappy dog! I love this little girl so much and it almost brings me to tears to think that I considered not taking her in because I had a pre conceived picture of what she was. I am so thankful that God put her in our path and in our lives and opened my mind. She is nothing like the Yappy little dogs I had conjured up. It's made me work hard on blowing up the other pre conceived notions I have. Instead of judging by what I thought, don't judge at all, nothing is perfect.

I always had big dogs like greyhounds and Afghan hounds. When the last one died there were a few years without any dogs ,and then I decided to look on Petfinder. Since I weigh 109 and my last dog weighed 75, she could take me flying if she was chasing a squirrel. So I decided, while I didn't want a lap dog(I have plenty of lap cats), I wanted a smaller dog who wouldn't pull me over. I have some osteoporosis being small boned and didn't need broken bones. I found a black and white Boston Terrier / Sheltie mix who was 6 months old. We went to see him, liked him on site and got him the next week. That was over seven years ago,and we think he's the best dog we ever had. Two years later, again on Petfinder I found a purebred standard black and tan dachshund who was in a kill shelter in WVA and rescued and brought to PA. He is another perfect dog. No peeing, pooping in the house, no digging, hardly any barking, no chewing, and he adores his three mile walks every day. I'd go to Petfinder, put in your zip and let your parents browse. You can specify what breed or size and age you want.

Hi all thanks for the comments. After reading them I can see I left out some details. I would never just go and get my parents a dog. Although my mom did this to me once! They are ready and have made the decision to get a dog. Mom asked me to start the search, she doesn't have the internet and wanted me to search pet finder which is where I found my three rescues. There are a lot of steps and processes with rescues and I am helping understand how it all works. I am very familiar with breeds and there personality traits and what my parents life style is and what they like, and what their needs are so I can weed out dogs that wouldn't be right. If I find something I think they would be interested I let them know and they check out the profile. There was as I mentioned one attempt but the rescue did not respond the dog has been on the web site for a long time which cast doubt in my mind about this rescue. Mom took it personally feeling judged and this may turn her off the rescue process. Usually in our area small dogs generate a lot of interest and are adopted quickly and are removed from the website. We did go to a local pound but mom made it clear she didn't want to do this again, she feels badly for the animals, getting them excited or upset when we didn't adopt (the right dog wasn't there) She has a big heart for animals and hates to see them suffer. Ultimately the decision to which dog they get will be moms but I really would like it if she would let my Dad have some influence on what breed size they get. Every dog they have had had been mom telling dad where to drive to the breeder and mom picking the dog from the litters. Dad lets mom have what she wants happy wife etc. There is nothing wrong with getting a puppy from the breeder but the last time they did this was not a great experience. Mom called an add in the penny saver and it turned out to be a puppy producing business not a breeder, not a puppy mill but the next thing to it. The first puppy became sick very quickly and died after my parents spent a lot at the vet and invested their hearts in the puppy trying to save it, the " breeder" then gave then a really hard time about honoring the guarantee. I was not able to say or do anything about it. Obviously I would be able to help avoid this if they were to buy a puppy this time but I would prefer to go with a rescue.

The dog that needs a home is with seniors they got her as a puppy, she is a calm girl already fixed. I suggested to my parents they could foster this dog. If they decided to give it a try I want them to know if it didn't work we would find a home for her, but at least this way we would have the dog in a safe home and not the pound until the best home could be found. I of course would love it of course if it turned out that mom learned that she would want to keep and have something bigger than a shih Tzu.

Of course there are always things I haven't thought about. I need actual peoples experience with different sizes pros cons, and the things that I couldn't possibly know. That's why I come here because yall always give my things to think about, make me think outside my own box its great.

The dog that needs a home is with seniors they got her as a puppy, she is a calm girl already fixed. I suggested to my parents they could foster this dog.If they decided to give it a try I want them to know if it didn't work we would find a home for her, but at least this way we would have the dog in a safe home and not the pound until the best home could be found.

*****

I just want to point out that most rescues make you sign legal documents that you will not breed, sell or give away your dog to anyone. If it doesn't work out, the dog goes back to the rescue. This ensures the dog has a safety net and will not wind up in a kill shelter.

What you propose, should it not work out, could put the dog at risk, once out of your hands.

Just something to think about.

Just another comment about "pound" or shelter dogs. DH and I got our first dog from the San Jose Animal Shelter. She was a great dog. A year later we got a second one from Palo Alto Animal Shelter. She was fine at first but later had dominance issues with the first one. I think it was because she was half Chihuahua. She was 8 lbs and tried to take on a German Shepherd, then 2 weeks later tried to take on a horse. We worked with her for 18 1/2 years but she was feisty to the end. The first one lived to be 14 1/2 and was a wonderful dog.

We were never going to get another after that Chihuahua mix, but 2 years later saw a picture of Elvira online and it was love at sight. Even more so after we met her at the foster family's home. She came from a rescue group and has been the BEST ever dog. So you can get great dogs at shelters or rescue groups.

I just read some of this thread that I missed before, and must add a word in favor of adopting from a shelter. We've done it many times, and I wish I were in a position to do it again. I can't imagine finer dogs than the ones that came to us this way. When you rescue a dog, the dog knows. It's just a wonderful thing all around.

If I had always had the dog that my partner wanted & not the dog that I wanted, & I was now retired & I wanted a dog, I think I'd have to ponder the question, "If not now, when?"

kind of like using the good china & wearing the good jewelry & making the bed with the embroidered pillow cases.

I've always liked big dogs, but last autumn I found a Chihuahua mix in the park.

She was standing like a petrified deer in the rain.

It took me 3 visits to get her to let me pick her up, & she was stiff & sore all week-end (I always find dogs on the week-end.)

Monday, the vet said she'd likely been thrown from a car.

She had no collar, no chip, & no one claimed her.

& she's a very good little dog-

gets along with everybody, is devoted to me (they know), & sleeps under the covers, which my big girl couldn't do even if it occurred to her to try.

so:

If a big-dog person can love a little dog, it seems to me that a small-dog person (or non-dog person?) can love a big dog, especially if the other party has always wanted one.

I wish both of your parents the very best, but really, I'm rooting for your dad.

Forty-eight comments: one would think that such a variety should cover almost all possibilities.

Maybe you could find a split one ...

... a small dog on one side ...

... and a larger one on the other ...

... (but differing leg lengths could mean that it couldn't walk very well)?

That said ... it seems to me that a number of good points have been made about the potential difficulty of older folks with diminished capabilities being required to care for a large dog ... as in wrapping one in a bed sheet, slinging it over one's shoulder to haul it down several steps to the backyard to pee (or deal with a weightier issue).

Some have discussed the major (and prolonged) voices that some minor-sized dogs seem able to display on occasion ... and the concern about them getting underfoot when one has diminished capabilities of righting oneself when feet are interfered with.

Dad wants big ... Mom wants small.

Maybe a compromise, of more or less half-way, might be a possibility?

Actually ... I'll bet that when they get to looking, they'll fall in love with one (... or it them) and the die will be cast.

Hopefully a medium-sized one?

And hopefully they agree as to the "right one"?

ole joyful

I think my DH and I have had our last dog. We had four Westies -- one at a time --over fifty years of marriage. We never considered a dog I could not lift in and out of the laundry tub, and DH preferred not to walk a "Fifi". Currently, we have one another; if either of us lived alone, another dog might be considered.

A dog can live 15 years or more. It's a long commitment -- and an expensive one. (Our last Westie had a $5K line in my 2015 budget.)

I have had dogs ranging from full grown weight of a 5 pound chihuahua to an 85 pound Bouvier de Flandres. If DH and I were looking for an additional dog now, at ages 64 and 60, I believe a medium sized dog would have an edge, if all sizes were available at a rescue.

Our smaller dogs were easier to pick up of course, fit easily on our laps, shed smaller amounts and were cheaper to feed, merely based on size. However, the chihuahua refused to go outside to do her business, during Winter, which is 5 months here! She would pee the second the door to the deck was opened, to avoid having to go outside and squat in the cold. We resorted to using pee pads, which were a hassle when she'd partially miss the pad, which was often, lol! It was harder to brush her teeth properly, because of her small mouth, yet small dogs are notorious for having worse gum/teeth problems, despite a very good diet. As well, she did get underfoot sometimes and hurt her leg once, just jumping off the sofa.

Our large dogs of course were quite difficult to pick up if they had to be hoisted anywhere, couldn't snuggle on our laps, shed much larger amounts, and cost more to feed. They would get hyper if they didn't get in 2 to 3 walks daily, which was bothersome in really cold or rainy weather, when it would have been nice if they'd be happy just doing their business in the backyard, instead of having to go on a walk around the block, lol! But they obviously never needed pee pads, were not reluctant about getting their teeth brushed and it was easy to do, they could move out of the way before getting accidentally stepped on, and never got injured jumping down from furniture.

My medium sized dogs (Cocker Spaniel, Terrier/Poodle) could still snuggle maybe not fully, but at least partially on laps, shed medium amounts, and ate medium amounts of food, in comparison to our small and large dogs. They'd easily go outside to do their business, and loved their walks, but didn't drive me nuts if weather was inclement and I just let them out in the backyard instead. They didn't get underfoot and didn't get injured easily.

So I'd have to say that at our ages, if we were wanting a second dog, I think I'd go for a medium sized dog, if nothing pulled at my heart for one particular dog,more than another. That would be my choice, based only on my personal experience, when comparing the cost of care and time required to address the needs of the small/medium/large dogs I have owned. I am not making any comparison about easier/more difficult personalties, because each dog is individual and should not be stereotyped because of size or breed, and each of ours were adored equally!

Feral dogs ( domestic dogs abandoned and gone wild) after a few generations, no matter what their original breed was, tend toward 40 lb after free breeding. I suspect this is a desirable weight for good and long life (dog's life).