Hi Guys: John - Count me in on the "guys" weekend too. You know how I love golf and a steak!!!! Patti - glad to hear you got your parcel, hope it was all in one piece. Just in case I'm not back on the 20th. Happy, Happy Birthday. French Licks - still get a kick out of the name (but my DD likes it more) - I have no preference, I will fly out of Detroit to where ever this place is located. Keep your fingers crossed, just finished all the boob crunching and ultrasound. Hoping the lump in right one proves to be "nothing". Will report in. Liver lesions are being left alone, aparently nothing to worry about. MRI on liver showed the lesion in the breast. Not sure if I told you about this, but thought I'd better let you all know what's happening. (John, too much info I know) DH has now found the "right" fit yet for a job. Hopefully something will come along soon as he is driving everyone nuts. (but the meals are fabulous). He is cooking completely SS and have all trimmed down some. (He's only 158 lbs., so he really doesn't need to be trimmed) I have to figure out how to send pictures so they can be posted, is it Marci who is taking care of that? I'll check in later. Take care Joanne

So in a nutshell, a frugal wedding can be done if you have the cooperation of family and friends and organization on your part. A trick I learned from an event planner--Visualize exactly what you want it to look like and then work backwards to make it happen. borrow as much as you can. Need a fridge in the barn? borrow one. Some people have extras in their garages and don't know what to do with them. A stove to warm things up? borrow. People love to help. Remember to show your appreciation. A mention at the reception or a written thank you. Put the whole thing on paper, from when you arrive at the farm to the ceremony, cocktail hour, reception. all the activities, all the cooking times, when this happens, when that happens. It will give you an idea of what you need, when and where. Invitations--colored paper and envelopes, save the date postcards, card stock, get four out of each piece, thank you's from walmart--or make them yourself, more heartfelt. Clothing--clearance racks, used or borrowed. For the guys, kahki pants and nice shirts and ties that match. (JC Penney) Forget the Tux or suit. Decor--flowers from fields in your area, twigs, grasses and grocery store florists. Make it yourself, many books out there on how to do it. This might even be an idea for your boquets and boutteniers...forget the tulle or use very little. Ribbon is big now. Twinkle lights, fairy lights--I just bought 20 boxes of white Christmas lights for .60$ each after the holidays. Reception--biggest expense. Everything make ahead. Pork loin, Chicken Breasts, a Turkey. Everything paper or plastic, good quality. Make your cake or grocery bakery. rent tables, chairs and tablecloths, you can use the chairs for the ceremony too. Boxed White Zin wine (it's what restaurants use?!, you can cover the boxes with pretty paper), beer kegs, appetizers, chips and dip from Sams or Costco. bottled water and pop. Don't forget cleanup. Maybe the Dad's can bartend? I'd find a couple to "host" the cocktail hour just to make sure things get done (music, food, make sure people are taken care of) and go like you want them to go. Remember, you will be taking pictures and the Mom's will be getting dinner out and the Dad's will be bartending, maybe....get everybody in place before the event, don't wait till the last minute. Always have a plan B for most everything. Have a little money to spend? have a square dance caller and the square dance club out to your place for entertainment and for fun. What would be more appropriate for a farm wedding? OK, these are just ideas, they can't all be solid gold. Make sure you have enough lighting in the barn and around the yard. Can you use square haybales for seating somehow outside the barn? or even inside. Not everyone is going to want to stay indoors if it's nice outside. Music--recorded ahead of time in the order you want it played. Your fiance may like to do this but find someone who can press play and pause for you and doesn't mind doing it all night long, make sure he or she gets a break once in a while during the evening. If you can't afford an MC, maybe you have an outgoing friend who wouldn't mind getting up and announcing activities for you. Don't depend on things flowing smoothly by themselves, have someone in place to help it along. And just a side note--I gradated from college three yrs ago and have yet to pay on my loans due to deferments. They will work with you for a long time.

Yes, A__ has ADHD. He's coming up on 11yo now, and he is MUCH better at coping with his ADHD and his emotions than he was at 8. I credit this to several key causes: 1) He is older and wiser. 2) We have worked on tooshies off with him to provide him with coping techniques. 3) Less time with GM and more time with BM (who has stepped up a lot in the last year - in part due to her fiance. I still disagree with many of her parenting choices, but she's 50-fold improved) Even on days where ADHD isn't getting the better of A__, he still sometimes looks for negative attention. When that happens, we try to remove ALL attention until he is ready to receive positive attention. And we frame it just like that to him: "A__, you seem to be looking for attention right now; but I think you are looking for bad attention. Please come back when you are ready for good attention." "A__, that was not a very nice thing to say. You can go to your room until you are ready to apologize and be nice. Then we will continue with ___what_we_were_doing__." "A__, I realize that you are angry, and that's OK. But until you can deal with your anger in a nice way, I don't want to be around you. When you are ready to talk about what is bothering you, please come back and we can figure this out." Do you think your DH would be able to switch to an approach like that? Unless it is a "major offense," A__ doesn't usually get an additional consequence after we have started fresh. We've found that this is eliciting better behavior from him that when we tried stricter consequences for the same behaviors. For example: A few weeks ago, A__ had a minor mouth-off to me when asked to put on his coat to play outside. He was informed that he could go out when he was ready to apologize for his smart-mouth and wear his coat. Five minutes later he came out of his sulk and said "Ceph, I'm sorry for being rude and I would like to play outside and I will wear my coat." So off he went and all was well. But later that day, when we were headed to the hockey game and discovered he had shoved hunks of cinder blocks under the tires of the car, but shouted that he "didn't give a crap" when we said this was a problem... Well, we still had hockey tickets we had paid for, so we decided he wouldn't get to roam and wander at the game (he loves to roam the arena), no snacks or treats at the game, and straight to bed when we got home. He apologized partway through the game. We accepted his apology, and the next morning, we just started from scratch with a new day.

Joanne~ Thanks for checking in. We are all sending warm rays of well thoughts to you. Please stay in touch. Raeanne & DeeMarie~ Yes, our ears were on fire. Can't wait to see the pics, of course. And Deemarie, congrats on the 8 pounds---my heavens, nothing tastes as good as getting thin feels! My eating kind of went out the window today. Three stressful situations finally made me cave! Luckily, I got out of the house and went to the elementary school where I cracked open a few geodes for the kids in 2nd grade---man, were they surprised when they saw the insides! I went to see "Miracle" (starring Kurt Russell). My kids loved it and so did I! What a great movie! That American team worked their tails off to get that medal. Catch it if you get a chance, but would be great for a rental too. Is anyone planning on seeing "The Passion"? Sounds like it makes quite an impression on people. I can't believe how quickly this month leapt by---yowsers! It's almost over!