What Constitutes a Leap?
santamiller
9 years ago
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Babka NorCal 9b
9 years agoDelawareDonna Zone 7A
9 years agoRelated Discussions
What constitutes mental or emothinal abuse?
Comments (70)I believe that this woman faces mental abuse without a doubt because I myslef is being subjected to very similar ways within my marriage. I never looked at it this way before but after reading her story i realize that it does exist and that i need to put my foot down and stop taking this type of treatment. I have only been married for 2 months prior to that i we started talking about 8 months before i got pregnant im 8 months pregnant with his child now. At this point in my pregnancy I lost my job and I stay at home it took him 5 months for us to move in to his parents house in the second floor. Initially I wanted an abortion when i found out that i was pregnant because I knew i wasnt ready financially to maintain a child as well as I didnt feel the timing was right. I come from strict parents who do not tolerate this type of behavior getting pregnant before marriage is a big no no So I was dating him at that time when I found out I was pregnant we werent officially boyfriend/ girlfriend but I did get the opportunity to meet his family and friends and they all seemed like really genuinely nice people, he however was a charmer and me being naive and vulernable decided to tag along. i knew he drank and partied alot but I kept thinking to myself that he would change I was going to end our relationship at the end of that summer i got pregnant but when i told him that i was pregnant he was so happy and i felt a warmth in my heart that ok this is his child too and to end this pregnancy would be wrong. boy did i ever regret not doing it, he became controlling and over powering, he wanted things his way or no way, i let alot of things slide, now that we have been married he would go out with his friends and cousins and leave me all alone, i was horribly sick with the cold so badly and he would ask me if i wanted to go out to a house party when im all conjested and cant breathe when i talk to him about it he yells back at me especially when hes drunk, he wants his food brought to him in bed while he watches tv he'll leave the trash piled up for days and ill have to take it out and being pregnant he wants me to clean the floor with a cloth on my knees and tells me to clean up before he comes home, and when he goes out drinking im thinking he"ll come back and we'll watch a movie or cook dinner together and he just comes to bed throw his socks on the floor n his coat on the bed and his hat wherever he feels like. then when i try to retaliate he wont let me speak only his point of view matters he dont care what i have to say or how i feel, i try to stand up for myself i know im soft spoken so he can easily talk over me. he claims he does everything for me and no other guy would do what he does.He says that i take advantage over him. he hasnt bought a thing for our baby yet he relies on everyones assistance, my family bought the car seat and stroller, instead he bought two tvs and games. Another thing he never bought anything for the kitchen yet i had to take money from my parents because I lost my job a few months ago to go by groceries sometimes and when i do he asks for receipts. whats worse is his mother and sister defends him constantly, they would call my phone and asks where he went and did he eat. they use my car for everything to the point where it got dents and scratches on it. If his sister does something for me he tells me im not appreciative he has a way of turning the tables on me making me feel guilty. When hes the one that neglects me and I have to simply tolerate it. Like this weekend for example friday he went out drinking when i call his phone he picks up and says he'll be some soon hes up the block or i kept on constantly calling his phone because i am sick a cold to bring me some food. He left home around 4 pm didnt get home until 1 am, thats not all saturday still wasnt feeling good i said ill go by my moms but was indecisive he told me he was going out to a club i was ok then ill go by my mom for the night he calls me next morning at 7 hasnt slept or didnt go home yet, then picks me up goes to the liqour store gets beers and alcohol brings his cousins over then decides to leave me home alone and goes to his cousins house to watch the game and tells me to cook when im sick and can barely eat anything have no sense of taste and cant breathe. Theres no double standard here in this relationship when i try talking to him about it he'll say "i know babe but im working on it you know how i am " so its like i just have no choice but to tolerate it. He paints a picture that we are about to have a family and we going to be happy but its all a show. i just feel manipulated and trapped and confused he uses love as a way to somehow make me feel that he cares but truly its just a tactic to get me to give in to his ways. I am young and I will admit was naive and i believe i let my low self esteem get in the way of things but its sad that i cant find a way to get up and leave or even talk to my parents about it my mom went into a deep depression as a result of this and i have to be there for her my dad just blames me for getting pregnant if there are any suggestions for help out there please let me know im on the verge of desperation....See MoreWhat constitutes "Hardware Overkill"?
Comments (11)I just posted an example, because people on Houzz had labeled it as overkill. I think people are reacting to the size of the pulls. The same pulls would work, but perhaps in a small size or some variation. I am struggling with the question myself, as I have a cup pull that I like, and a handle that I like. I don't especially like the knob that matches, but I do have a small slideout that needs a nob (too narrow for a cup pull). They are a bit on the fussier side, so I'm concerned with overkill. That got me thinking... what is overkill? Are there examples? Here's an example with knobs, bar pulls and cup pulls. There are a lot of items here in a small area... probably could have swapped some cup pulls for knobs... [Traditional Kitchen[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/traditional-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2107) by Fairfax Kitchen And Bath Kleppinger Design Group, Inc. Here is an example of three types, but one that seems to be in balance: [Traditional Kitchen[(https://www.houzz.com/photos/traditional-kitchen-ideas-phbr1-bp~t_709~s_2107) by Chicago Architect COOK ARCHITECTURAL Design Studio And finally, a link to pulls that are way ornate Here is a link that might be useful:...See MoreWhat constitutes short cycling??
Comments (29)"They hit 120 degrees a couple weeks ago. She has 2 AC's and said they didn't shut off all day." "Run-time varies from 30+ mins during heat of the day to 10-ish mins in early morn hrs" This varying equipment behavior is to be expected, isn't it? I would believe that a lot of people "set it and forget it" at their thermostat. I do. 73F from May to September, no setbacks programmed. With this in mind, how can one expect their system to do anything else but have cycle times of very different lengths? When does the thread topic change from "it's short cycling!" to "it runs 24/7!"? After all, isn't the purpose of HVAC to provide comfort? I'm comfortable at 73F. If I were to have a bigger droop set in the stat, or agree to raise or lower the set point as outside conditions change, I guess I would have uniform, perfectly long cycles. No thanks, I'll leave it as is. Comfort does come at a price sometimes....See MoreWhat constitutes a plenum and requires plenum rated low voltage cable?
Comments (1)I believe you are correct. If you want some light reading, find Section E4303 found in 2018 IRC....See Moreken_adrian Adrian MI cold Z5
9 years agoDelawareDonna Zone 7A
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