I came to this site looking for ideas for my parents who are trying to come up with a good 50th anniversary gift for my grandparents as well. I appreciate the ideas that have been posted thus far. I do have a suggestion for the group - My mom made a cross-stitch blanket that is hanging above my grandparents' bed for one of their anniversaries. It's basically a family tree and includes a square for each person - My mom stiched i.e. "John" (son) and his birthdate and then "Jane" (wife) and her birthdate, and in between the two - their wedding anniversary date. And then below John and Jane are the three kids and their birthdates. In each person's square she stitched a little item that represents that person - like my square has a piano because I play piano... my cousin's has a baseball, etc. It was VERY well received and it's perfect because we know how when you get old you are very good at forgetting dates! I thought this was the best gift idea ever and it was very well received. And every time a new family member is added, my Mom just updates the blanket.... The problem is now, we have their 50th anniversary coming up and this past anniversary gift is going to be very hard to top.

We got two gifts in total. A vacuum cleaner and a pressure cooker. Both most welcome and the pc is still in use. No ’shower’ and only 8 wedding guests. Just parents, siblings and their spouses. DD got married during covid with the permitted 6 guests but a year later we had a party with 100 guests. They requested no gifts, just donations to two charities. The Italian side of the family found this diffcult to grasp and gave a lot of knickknacks they neither want nor need.

I honestly don't know anything about what would be an appropriate gift in Boston. In fact, as far as Houston (where I've lived my whole life), AFIK there's no "custom" gift. Not that I'm up on all that stuff!! The thing is, I give what I feel comfortable giving rather than trying to figure out what the couple expects or what the local tradition might be. If money is the custom there, they'll already be getting a lot of checks. Why not make your gift one of the few personal items that stand out and get remembered? I have a few quotes below from a very wise person who frequents this forum. See if you can figure out who said all this: When I got married, I did not have enough experience to know what would REALLY come in handy as my family and entertaining needs grew. Even then, I could see the difference between the gifts our peers gave us -- "unique," fun, or short-term stuff (e.g., a bed tray and a subscription to a book review) -- and the things the "grown-ups" got us: serving pieces, carving board, tablecloths, dishes, flatware, etc. We liked and appreciated all of it, but I could see the older generation had the better idea, and theirs are the gifts I am still gratefully using almost 26 years later. Registries tell me colors, styles, etc. I often give a silverplate water pitcher (there's an example of something you don't know you'll need but never have enough of, if you entertain). I look at the couple's registry to decide whether to choose a very simple or more ornate style. Not many young couples need giant serving platters or dishes, flatware, and crystal for 12 or 18. But years later, when they start to take their turn hosting holiday meals and family get-togethers -- for a family that will probably be getting larger -- they are going to need all that stuff -- at least many people do. Twenty-six years ago, I never imagined serving 29 people dinner in my home. But that is what we are doing tomorrow! So even though at the time it seemed like we would never use all the platters, bowls, and pitchers, I have used every one of them many times over the years. The nicest bonus is that every time I use the "boring" items, even all these years later, I think fondly of the person who gave it to me. That is a very lovely experience you don't get if all you get is cash or things you registered for yourself. My favorite gift was a big, fancy silver plate platter from my great aunt. She had received it as a wedding gift when she married into our family in the 1950s. I certainly didn't have occasion to use it much in the early years of our marriage, but I use it all the time now, and I think of her every time I see it. This is probably more a matter of local and ethnic custom than anything else. In many communities the northeast, for example, it seems that cash gifts are so customary that "thing" gifts are unusual (for wedding gifts \-\- these people also often give very large "thing" gifts for engagements and showers). But several posters who live in the south have reported that in their communities cash gifts are considered impersonal to the point of being a no\-no. Both are common here. I prefer to give a "thing" gift, but that's just my preference.

Not knowing the couple, I'm short on ideas. I do have our invitation, decoupaged on wood and done by my mother. I haven't displayed it for years, but it's meaningful and I wouldn't get rid of it. I have my bouquet - dried not preserved so it doesn't look wonderful but I know what it is and that's what counts ;0) I can happily admit to having my brownie sash with all the badges too in a zippered little satin envelope in my lingerie chest. When I'm sorting, updating, I take it out and look at it, fold it carefully and put it back - with a pair of my childhood white Easter gloves that are about 2 1/2 inches long finger tip to wrist. I don't display a lot of personal things, it's not my decorating style but it doesn't mean they aren't important to me. Watchme, along with the brownie sash, there has been a cheaply made trophy here all our married lives, something presented to DH at a grade school hoop shoot tournament. And, all those years, I've heard from a friend of his that the trophy should have been his, of the two of them, he was the better player than DH. We're talking about maybe 4th grade, I barely remember 4th grade. When friend turned 50, I wrapped the trophy and gave it to him for his birthday present. He cried, and it's in their game room displayed now....these things matter to some ;0)