I can't speak to marble although I would probably consider it in my next kitchen. Soapstone, I live with. It is so easy and so kid friendly that you could not do better. No chemicals, no treatments, no worries. Soapstone is fantastic.

I wanted marble too, but decided against it, choosing soapstone instead. I use my kitchen--a lot of cooking. I rarely oil the stone, although I have on occasion to hide scratches (they disappear as soon as I oil). One small, small chip where my husband let a cast iron pot fall high from the cupboard above. I did go with a drop in sink because I didn't want to take any chance of chipping along the sink edge. It's a microedge from Blanco. Here's a picture of it just after install. I love my soapstone and can't ever imagine having anything else.

Soapstone is so beautiful and I'm very excited about it! But then I read horror stories about chips and water rings. Thanks for the replies!

We have 6 children, 4 of them under the age of ten. I wouldn't say soapstone carries no worries. It is all about you and what you can take as far as scratches, dings, and chips. We have have beautiful stone but it is softer. Dings happen, chips happen, and scratches happen. It's just a countertop, albeit very pretty to look at.

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This post was edited by bcafe on Tue, Nov 19, 13 at 9:44

You can go with a harder soapstone and don't have to worry about chips and dings. We have Belvedere. Never oil it. I have dropped cans of soup from an upper cabinet (the one shown in the pic) and the can dented, not a mark on the counter top.

It doesn't stain and you can wipe it down with anything. It does not absorb anything either.

We love it...and FWIW, I have 2 kids (3 if you count my husband) who are 9 and 11...and my husband is the sloppiest cook.

I've got both, but we are grandparents not parents. Actually, I'd vote for either if you do a good job of sealing the marble. Although our marble counter gets less use than the ss, we haven't really had any problems with stains or etching. We have a couple small dings in our ss, but they are only noticeable when I wipe down the counter and can feel the small depression. I too am not a fan of granite and love the soft appearance of these types of stone.

My son and DIL have soapstone (including on a peninsula where everyone sits on stools to eat and do other things) and have kids. They had been very concerned about soapstone with an extremely active 2 year old who likes to bang on things. They haven't had any regrets.

Thanks everyone for the responses! Here in Ohio it seems like granite is the norm. Barely the mention of soapstone or marble and all I get is "well why wouldn't you just get granite, it comes in different colors" I say who wants to be just like everyone else!? Granite is lovely but I just want something different and I think soapstone or marble or both would work well in my 1931 home.
I really appreciate the feedback and the photos!

We are planning on using both in our new kitchen and I have a 7 and 4 year old. What sealed the deal for me with marble was looking at a demonstration kitchen in a local tile shop. It was 12 years old and all carrera marble. Sure there was some etching and scratches but I still thought it was beautiful and they assured me the kitchen was used heavily and no one babied it. Soapstone is just so lovely and "petable" I fell in love with it when I went to the stone yards and nothing else seemed to really do it for me. If you can get some samples and abuse them you will have a better idea of what you are in for. I dropped my heaviest cast iron pan on my soapstone sample and it took out a ding. Once I oiled it though I could hardly see it any more, only if I ran my finger over it. I don't plant to drop my cast iron pans but you never know. You have to be comfortable with it getting a patina.

We have soapstone going on 3 years and use the heck out of the kitchen. It's a harder variety and we rarely oil. I might have some patina but once it's waxed, it looks brand new again. I can't say enough about how much I LOVE this choice in our kitchen.

Greendesigns: 'Life gets lived and leaves marks. You've gotta be more than "just OK" with that, you have to actively embrace those marks if you want soapstone and marble.'
If we have ever have GW awards, this wins for poetry. Thank you, Greendesigns!

I have a softer soapstone, and it has a lot of chips around the sink. I don't really like it because I'm used to honed granite, which doesn't chip, but does need to be oiled with mineral oil (I don't use sealer on granite because it's so toxic). The chips bother me, and so does the generally messy look of my SS. I did not research ss, just bought a slab that looked nice in the stone yard. I regret not doing research, but I had very little time. I would replace it if I could, but I don't have the $$, so I'm living with it. It does look nice when oiled, but I don't want to bother with that, and it's still chipped, under the oil.

Remember soapstone doesn't "need" to be oiled. Oil it if you like the look of it.

Hey Cynthia - I've got soapstone here in Columbus and yes - it is a bit outside the norm but all my guests are over the moon when they see it.

I use it hard and never oil it. My grandmother had it in her summer kitchen. It was over 100 years old and yes, looked lived in but, to my eye at least, was beautiful.

I've never regretted it for a second.

Doc

Hi Cynthia, I'm in Ohio too (Cleveland) and agree that everyone around here thinks granite is the pinnacle of countertop success.

I wanted soapstone, but got nervous about durability/wear. We are not fussy about dings, dents, and scratches ("life leaves marks") but on the other hand, we don't want something that is going to crumble if we breathe too hard.

Granite is fine, but I wanted something different yet durable. We opted for granite - cesarstone to be exact. From what I've read it is very durable and forgiving. It doesn't look exactly "natural" which would be my chief complaint (only complaint, actually, as we haven't actually used the countertops yet). But it's pretty, reasonably priced, and suits our needs.

Hope you have better luck than I did with soapstone in central Ohio. Not many stoneyards carry it, and then have much less of a clue than gardenwebbers about type and fabrication.

There's an outfit in in Indiana, near Cincinnati, that sounded good, but cost more than we were willing to go for in this kitchen.

Marble will be easier to come by, both in selection of slabs and of fabricators.

I am a fabricator.

Marble is a highly compromised choice for a kitchen even without kids. It's scratches, stains, and etches in normal use without kids.

Soapstone, on the other hand, is very durable and stain resistant. It can be scratched but scratches can be sanded out by the homeonwer.

Soapstone for your situation is a FAR better choice.

You have to be able to live with "patina".

We just installed ~26feet of Vermont Danby marble in our kitchen (perimeter). We also have a butcher block top for our peninsula.

Family of 4, 2 elementary school kids.

We do just about everything on the bb countertop.
Kids are young, so they're mainly at the peninsula.

I seal the marble often, so no stains.

DH and I have been causing most of the "damages" on the marble.
- DH made a major ding/chip in our sink while washing a pot (yes, we can have it professionally sand down, right before we put our house on the market)
- there's mucho mucho etchings, but now I hardly see them (except in the right lighting)
- and many many scratches/tiny dings, like when I put 1 handle of my pot on the far sink side while holding this handle to fill the pot w/ water (lazy: stop doing that now), or when I was crushing eggshells (before putting into the compost) and that left light scratches...

But as we use the marble daily, I can just picture it after 3-10+years, how all the "flaws" will blend together and I am looking forward to that "aged" look.
If you consider that look "flawed", then marble is not for you.

Last note: my house is pretty messy right now (switching from summer to winter clothes, business office moving stuff), etc, and I'm feeling a lot of stress.
BUT when I clear off my beautiful countertop, wipe it down, I actually do a sigh of relief as I admire the beauty and calmness of my marble countertop.
The peninsula is covered w/ kids projects, compost to take out, cast iron pan to "salt-clean", etc, but just looking at my cleared beautiful marble countertop brings me a piece of Zen.

good luck,
Amanda

I know it's heresy here, but many solid surfaces resemble marble and outperform them substantially. You're cheating yourself if you don't at least give them consideration.

We have soapstone and marble. I'm not a patina gal and sometimes it bothers me but I still can't think of anything I would rather have used. Both stones are very beautiful but they definitely have a lived in look. The chips and dings don't bother me; it's the unevenness of the finish (etching in the marble and dark and light areas of the soapstone).

I am one of the people who experienced horrible water rings and spots. Basically its the result of the water lifting the oil from the surface for some reason. I had the counters refinished and they are better but still not great so I stopped oiling them. I also have dark and light splotches that never go away, even with oil. Don't know what's going on there but looks etched, even though that's not supposed to happen. In the end, I have a love/hate relationship with my soapstone. I was surprised that the etching in the marble hardly bothers me at all and I'm sorry I didn't use it for the whole kitchen.

I love my soapstone and have never regretted getting it. I'm not a granite sort of girl. It does scratch little if I'm not careful, and sometimes I ding it a little bit. It doesn't bother me, and I'm fussy about things. It really isn't noticeable. My kitchen is a well used kitchen, beautiful, but not built for show. It was built for me. I cook everything from scratch, and use cast iron cookware, and it has surpassed my expectations.

I've only gotten a water mark once, but it went away once I got around to oiling the counter again.

I had Corian in my last house. It was "O.K."

My soapstone was purchased and installed by Creative Soapstone out of south Florida. Wonderful people.

It is important that you search for a fabricator that is an expert with soapstone. Some stone yards will tell you they know how to install soapstone, when they really only know granite. It's best to choose someone who specializes in soapstone.

Cheri- I have read about your issues with your soapstone in the past. If you used an enhancing sealant on the counters then I think you would be a lot happier with the overall look, they would be a more even darkness and not get water marks. You have a lovely kitchen and it sucks to have spent so much time and money to live with something that you are not fully happy with.
If interested then I would suggest having your counters cleaned well to remove all past oil and use Miracle 511 seal and enhance, I have tried others but this one works the best. It does not change the stone in any way other than making it dark and water beads on the surface.
I was hesitant to try sealants myself because of the various things that I had read here but my counters have been in for over 4 years and I would not have enjoyed them as much if I was dealing with oiling or waxing and the constant unevenness (I tried both on counters in other parts of the house and left one natural for a while- it looked like a mess.)

Sorry for the hijack away from the original question.

Hi Athomeinva. I may just look into that. Thanks for the tip!!!

I considered soapstone and marble, and only used marble on the kitchen table, BS and a small ledge. The rest of the counters are quartz. The soapstone I saw was all pretty soft -- when you can scratch it with a fingernail you can imagine what life would do. For me it was the wrong choice. We are still living in freakout mode with the marble -- and still have a ding from a pot. You gotta love the patina.

We've decided on soapstone for the counters and island, now just to find somewhere in Cleveland to buy it. Thanks for all the input!

Good luck with your soapstone. We had it installed in July and I thought I would be fine with the scratches, marks and dings. I have three kids (9, 6 and 4) and have noticed significant wear and tear already. I thought I would lose my mind when my little guy, without thinking, put a big scrape in the stone with his fork. I loved the look of soapstone, the matte black and white veins, still do in fact, but in retrospect I would likely have been happier with a harder stone given the treatment afforded by my kids. Be prepared for marks aplenty! Even with the harder variety of soapstone (which I have).

Please post photos when its done!

Please post photos when its done!

As Green Designs wrote: 'Life gets lived and leaves marks. You've gotta be more than "just OK" with that, you have to actively embrace those marks if you want soapstone and marble.'

Love this, and so true! here is our Mariana after about nine months of heavy use... love, love, love my soapstone, nicks and all!

BTW those little white flecks will disappear if I oil it, but I'm preferring the more natural look right now...

I love the gorgeous soapstone pictures! So if the soapstone counters are not oiled, they stay the pretty medium gray color and if they are oiled, they become a pretty very dark color?

lynn, yes that is correct. Here is a shot of the first time mineral oil hit my soapstone, you can see the drastic difference...

ctycdm, I love both the lighter gray and the oiled gray. I love soapstone counters as well as loving marble counters. What is so nice about the soapstone is how neutral it is and I love veins in it to add interest without being too busy.

Nursecynthia, I am not sure if they carry Soapstone, but we used Bradley Stone for our quartz and they were fantastic! Sarah really knows her stuff.

Also, I believe Cleveland Kitchen and Tile in Rocky River carries soapstone. Leslie there is great.

Have had my soapstone countertops about 4 months now, and don't love them. I haven't "oiled" them because I prefer the light grey color. The small dark spots caused by even a potato chip crumb remain even after washing off with soapy sponge. Loved them upon install, but now wish I had gone with ceasarstone.

@Roccod - have to agree with you. My DH keeps saying: "I told you so". We will be renovating our cottage and there will be no soapstone. Granite, Quartz or Caesarstone. Anything to stand up to little boys and a big girl with pens, forks or any other utensil that can scrape.

Here I am at the end of a long discussion .....does anyone have some pictures of the patina marble develops after years of use? I , too, am deciding between soapstone and marble. I do wonder how much the denser soapstone (architectural) vs artistic costs