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Kitchen Compromise - How do you co-design with your family?

14 years ago

I am sitting in my nearly complete kitchen and seeing (and mostly enjoying) the mis-mash of my husband's and my different ideas and wondering how everyone else pulls this off the balancing act of family compromise when designing their kitchens. Recent posts from the woman who can't bear to see another white kitchen because her husband talked her into wood and another who is trying to combine stone and glass tile in the back splash because she wants one and he want the other points out that I am not the only one.

So maybe those of us who have been or are struggling through this process of compromise (or strong arming :) can shed some light for others. I could have really used this insight before I started. Here is my story of Kitchen Compromise.

We didn't have a plan of how to work together - the kitchen just evolved - but I don't necessarily recommend this approach. We ended up doing a little of everything we both wanted, as well as listening to the house (who knew it would have a say.) We both love contemporary but the house screamed keep a traditional flavor. We started with a cabinet compromise including both natural wood (my husband) and painted (me) in inset shaker with a bead - then everything evolved from there. More zen like perimeter counters with a dramatic quartzite island (DH likes bold.) All different hardware to complement each piece and finish (and my love of all hardware.) I do think the back splash will be where the rubber hits the road - how to pull it all together... We are just going to put that one off for now.

I let my husband stock the shelves - with some input. We are still in negotiations on the use of the double sink. DH seems to think I signed a contract that the small basin would be "his" ready for action at all times - I want to drain clean dishes there when he is not "ready." We have actually had a brief shouting match on this topic (and many laughs about it since) but have still not resolved it. I don't want to have to call my lawyer :)

Overall I think our compromise ended up in a more interesting kitchen than if either of us lead the way - or maybe I am just trying to convince myself :)

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