laurels

19 years ago

I started this new because it was just to you... didn't want to get off track on the other post.

Laurels ... yours mine and hers... nice set up!!!

Did your MIL ever say anything about it? Like what a dumb request? Or she can't understand why you wouldn't do the BM a favor?

Has hubby arranged afterschool care for him for this year? My SC are bugging because they "might" have to go to afterschool care ..but the oldest now 12 is too old for daycare ... So we told mom he would have to be home alone for an hour and half each day and she is flipping. Can't he go to ______'s house..._____'s mother was in a severe accident 2 years ago, she's not right lots of brain damage still in rehab daily has full-time help in the house. (She got lost going to the mailbox 1/2 a block away). So you would rather your child go to a home with a brain damaged women who can't even care for herself than stay by himself for an hour and a half?????

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laurels4u
19 years ago
MIL and DH had it out last summer regarding us taking the half-sister. Both DH and I agreed it was not in our best interests or our children's. The half-sister has caused a lot of serious problems with DH. The girl's mother alienated her from her biological father very early on in their lives so DH's parents picked up the slack. DH never asked his parents to sever their relationship with the half-sister, but that we would not develop one with her. We felt that if we were to have her in our home, it would only provide the BM with more insight and control over our lives. The MIL still cannot understand this as she herself is a control freak, so in a way, it was her way of trying to control my husband and I. I know it sounds surreal but we are estranged from DH's parents over this issue as well as MIL's mental health issues. It's not funny but MIL had a brain tumor removed 10 years ago, and DH says they took her brain but left the tumor.

As far as afterschool care goes, I don't know what DH is planning on doing. Right now, the school information sits on DH's dresser collecting dust. He hasn't even looked at it. I guess I should mention it to him that "he" needs to come up with a plan.
angelz921
19 years ago
I know this post has nothing to do with me but I have to say. My husbands ex-wife would never let us pick up his daughter unless we took her other daughter with us. It was put like well she wont go unless you take Genesis (her half sister) too.

When my husband had his mediation last month with his ex, he specifically stated that he would not have to pick her up and that she wasn't to bring her to the EOW supervised visits. He hated to do so and he says he feels guilty but said he was tired of feeling like he couldn't have a relationship with his daughter unless he took the other children too.
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laurels4u
19 years ago
Hi Angelz, It certainly sounds like you and DH have been through the ringer as well. During DH's divorce and custody hearings, the half sister was NEVER mentioned since she is not my husband's responsibility. The girl spied for her BM during the divorce proceedings as well as during subsequent visits which almost cost my DH dearly in court because of the lies she went home and told her mom which were twisted by BM's attorney. Never mind the fact that the BM has been witnessed intoxicated in bars dancing topless! Anyhow, I'm sure my DH probably felt bad at some point about not taking the half sister because he did like her, however, as a teacher, I cannot have a child around who threatens and lies maliciously with the intent to deliberately hurt lives. The girl has already been kicked out of alternative school and I know up until last year, BM used to call DH and whine about how she couldn't control the girl. My husband understands the seriousness of the situation but his mom quite simply doesn't.
angelz921
19 years ago
Unfortunately the half sister in this case is a very sweet little girl. Who I actually loved being around, she respected me so much more then my own SD, But mother was using us as a baby sitting service. I told my DH that I would love to have both girls over the house to play but neither he or myself feel that we should have to take both in order for him to spend time with his own daughter.

I can't believe that the BM in your case would act that way, it's sad when parents use there kids to destroy someone's life like that. But unfortunately there are people like that.

laurels

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laurels4u

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