Thanks for the info - the reason I'm asking here is not only getting first-hand information on whether they'll live, I'm getting conflicting info here: http://www.clevelandseniors.com/home/treedas.htm http://www.clevelandseniors.com/home/tom-das6.htm versus here: http://www.waterloogardens.com/resources/articles/12/alberta/ From what I know about this location in the summer, I shouldn't put anything on it that can't take scalding heat. I'd move these to areas that we have some ferns in that get only early morning light. However, in the winter, I am concerned about the plants roots freezing up while in the planter, even situated within 3 feet of the north side of the house.

You could buy the crew a nice lunch and or beer at the end of the workday on the last day they work before Christmas. I do believe that would be about it in my opinion. If the GC's super had been on site constanatly and you feel he did a good job watching everyone's back (including your's) you might give him an envelope ($) if your so inclined as well.

When I was a kid it was so easy. Mom and dad were still married and came from the same hometown. So a visit to the grandparents meant a trip to only one place. We would stay a few days with one side, and a few days with the other. It was great. When my parents got divorced it got more complicated. My brother and I had four Christmases one year: I drove home from college in Missouri to Florida for Christmas with Mom/granny; flew to Maryland for Dad/stepmom/stepbrothers; drove to PA for cousins; then on to Ohio for Dad's dad, then drove back to Maryland, flew back to Fla. and drove back to Mo. It was exhausting. Now I am married to DH, whose parents are also divorced. The four parents live in: California, Arkansas, Alabama and Florida. Oh, and his mom and dad can't be together. And my mom and stepmom can't be together. Then there are DH's kids and their own in-laws . . . it's like that riddle with the farmer trying to cross the river with a fox, a chicken and a sack of grain. Our Christmas solution? DH sees his dad about twice a year when he comes from CA to Ark. to visit his brothers and have a fishing trip. We used to go to DH's sister's (his mom lives on the sister's property) for Thanksgiving, but there was a huge family meltdown back in '04 that put a stop to all that. So now DH sees his mom on those same spring and fall trips to Ark. and we go out (with my mom) for Thanksgiving. My mom always gets the actual holidays, because she is single and, frankly, the most pitiful (I know, I know -- but it's true) and lives here in town. Dad and stepmom fit in where they can, usually coming up before or after Christmas. DH's boys are usually with their Mom on Christmas. We have DH's daughter and family over usually the week before or after Christmas, or meet them halfway for dinner -- and invite the boys to this. My brother comes in from Tx. some time around Christmas, but also goes to his girlfriends' folks in Ky. Whew! I'm tired already! There is no way the kitchen will be done in time for Christmas this year, so there will be a lot of eating out. There will also be liberal use made of hotels for visiting relatives, as my mother informs me that the cute little pull-out sofa-chairs I got from IKEA for the spare-bedroom-turned-home-office are not beds at all, and should be donated to the CIA for interrogation purposes.

I can understand your concern, of course. However, from what you say, you were really just casual acquaintances. I think you just need to sit back and realize that whatever is going on, she's made it clear she's not ready to share it with you (and may never be). The ball's in her court--if she wants to be in touch she will, if she wants to give you more details, that's up to her. I'd give her time, and next time you e-mail (at your usual annual time), just let her know you're there for her if she needs anything, and let it go at that.