FallDownGoBump... I hear ya... Loud and clear... Sounds as if we're both in the same boat... Hubby has 3 sisters and 2 brothers left and not one of them even bothered to send a card or call on his birthday, let alone any other time. Even if I did ask for help not one of them would... But the real kicker is that hubby has helped EVERYONE in his family and everyone has screwed him in some way... Six of his nine siblings and his father has lived with us at one time or another... When we first married we took in his father and youngest sister with the stipulation that 4 of the other brothers and sisters chip in a lousy $7. a week... The first week we got $21. the next week we got $14. then not another cent or even a crust of bread... I could go on for hours about them but I won't... It only upsets me more... My story: Three years ago hubby broke his hip and two days after the surgery they sent him home with me with no additional help... Three days after that something happened and he didn't know who he was, where he was or who I was... After a two week stay in the hospital, so they could perform every test known to man, they told me he had 2 strokes and a little stiff from the partial hip replacement but otherwise he was in good health and they sent him to a rehab facility ( nursing home )... BTW, while he was there, recovering, his youngest sister got it in her head that since the nursing home offered hospice services that was all they did and turned around and told hubby that's why he was there! Sorry for getting off on another rant... Anyway, after two months the rehab facility sent him home... For about a month and a half the visiting nurse and a physical therapist came over twice a week... By then I had to find a doctor because hubby's meds were running out. After reviewing all his medical records the doctor says hubby had SEVERAL strokes and a heart attack!!!! Ok, sorry, that's yet another rant... Right now I have a 67 year old hubby who moves as if he's 100 and, at times, has the brain of a 2 year old... Hugs, Rita

LOL...you all are too much. prosperity - yes he does look a lot like a real person. Slinkey - I'm certainly not used to him by any means...lol Angela - he is creepy...when you take his hat off the hair comes off with it and he looks like a creepy incarnation of Mr. Clean. Kathleen your match.com comment was just too funny. Yachter - you have a good point there. However ever since last night he keeps scaring the cr*p out of me. I keep forgetting he is there and everytime I walk by he lights up and starts talking. Almost made me jump out of my skin a couple of times...LOL luvs - I considered that and covering him with a sheet but then he'll just look like a big ghost...LOL My youngest is in negotiation with me to let him reside in his room until next Halloween - he thinks he is "cool". We shall see...he is certainly an inside prop and more then likely would not hold up to the weather we have up here around October. Happy Halloween everyone...:)

I can understand where you're coming from (well, more where she's coming from). My husband is very huggy and physically demonstrative...I am not -- due to a lack of such of demonstrativeness in my family, as well as some sexual abuse history on my part. I personally start to feel physically threatened or uncomfortable if someone, including my husband, invades my personal space when I'm not expecting it, or not "in the mood" for it. This is something we've had to overcome, by both compromising -- I push my physical comfort boundaries whenever possible, and he knows not to push me when I ask him not to. The important thing is for both of you to be aware of this issue, and work together towards a mutally comfortable level of affection -- it is possible for those of us who are "colder" to learn to appreciate snuggling on the couch for a while, and for those that are more physically demonstrative to occasionally just say "I love you" without diving in for a hug every time. I think it's very important that you find out if you can make each other happy in this regard before you get married. I do also think that lack of physical affection can be a sign of a major issue in the relationship, though, if it's accompanied by actual physical pushing away by one partner, or a refusal to discuss the situation. My poor brother-in-law was married to a woman that would push him away if he came over to hug her, and they had no sex life (they just recently divorced; not a surprise to any of us who had seen how she avoided ever being close to him). If the lack of demonstrativeness is extending into all areas of your romantic life, then you have a major problem.

To clear a few things up. My daughter is in counseling and I was told a long time ago that she will never accept anyonen in my life because she has become so accustom to it just being us, her me and her brother whom she has an issue with also. My husband does not see his sons because his ex does not allow. He has a court order for visitation everyother weekend but when he tries to see them or call them. She changes phone numbers emails and plans trips when he is to see them, go to court, well when we do they just tell her to allow the visits one son is severally disabled so its not easy see or talking to him the other two want to see him but when its time the youngest tells him that mom bought him something or is buying him something and cant come and she wont allow them to visit if we dont take all three. Which we would love to do. Hitting. I didnt hit him I fought back. there is a difference. We are in counseling and for those of you who have never had an illness mental or not congradulations. Your lucky. I was hopen for help in trying to make this family work. Was to help my daughter and ways to help my family. Yes I have failed in areas but it seems to me that I am on the right track by asking for help here and with thearpy. Im not a woman who sits on her butt and does nothing Im well educated and get along well with my family. I have a good job which in theses times is amazing. To some of you have posted positive things........thanks they were needed and appreciated. To the others well sounds like some are bitter or enjoy living the life of negativity. I am keeps my family safe all of them. I will not endanger my children for anyone not even myself happiness or gain. GOD trusted me with their love and care I just have come to a crossroad that is new and scary to me the thought of not raising a healthy happy well adjusted child or having a healthy marriage. Everyday will be a struggle for us all and everyday a challenge. That is what life is and to learn from them is what Im suppose to do. Maybe this marriage will not work. Maybe my daughter will grow up with men issues not just because of me but her father. Maybe my son will never find love or be independent in life. These things scare me, but I have to try and find a way to make life better for all. Why? because I love them all. Give me advice not a way out!