How about hitting it with chains? That should chip it. I'm guessing some of the cream-colored paint would come off to show blue or red underneath (or both).

I appreciate the thought, but I'm afraid it would just make big dents. It's not a chippy paint, in this case, unfortunately!

I'm still flirting with the idea of streaking on paint remover. Something like a comb, where it wouldn't peel off in giant chunks.

Whatever I figure out, I'll post.
Thank you!

I was wondering if my idea of applying paint stripper in selected areas might work? I know it'd cause some bubbling, which I could then knock off. That won't work, because it dissolves the paint and leaves it gummy. When you scrape you get stringy globs of paint. It will look like a bad stripping job, not old paint.

You could try to blister it lightly with a heat gun and scrape, but you only get one chance at getting it right.

A realistic distressed finish is harder to get right than an ordinary paint job,l and the best control comes with the additive method - starting with a plain base and adding the layers and textures.

For a crackled finish you can apply white glue where you want crackle and then paint over it. The current cream would show through the cracks in the top coat. For a multi-color undercoat showing through the crackles, as if this was the umpteenth coat of paint and various bits have peeled off, paint parts of the armoire in different colors before you do the glue and top coat.

http://lakegirlpaints.blogspot.com/2012/05/texture-blast-table.html Rustic-looking paint technique

http://pinterest.com/pin/210754457532149232/

http://www.prettyhandygirl.com/2010/09/aging-is-so-distressing-techniques-for.html

Here is a link that might be useful: Crackle finishes

lazygardens,
I just spent my entire morning reading your blog.
You're quite a prolific crafter!

I was afraid of the paint stripper making a mess. Sounds like it would look like the Vaseline method of "crackling" which simply looks a bad stripping job to me.

I appreciate the advice. I'll probably try sanding some of the edges, then as you suggested, striping on some different paints, glue-crackling it, and some thinned, dark wax for contrast. I've been reading my butt off, having just spent an entire week on Pintrest and blogs.

A question. Do you say "Trust me" as often as you write it? I ask simply because (as psychological studies have affirmed) the minute someone says that to me, my inclination is to feel there's something there not to trust. OTOH, when you (or anyone) says, "ask me how I know" it immediate invokes a feeling of empathy, since we've all BTDT in some fashion! :)

In the meanwhile, congrats of such a great family, your move, overcoming cancer, your successful projects, and your joys in life. It was a real pleasure reading your day-to-day accomplishments.

When I get my butt in gear, I'll post pictures of my project.
I appreciate your time!
Christine

Thanks, but that was no my blog ... just one that I refer people to.

My blog has my Buffalo Grass experiment and not much else.

Im busy using paint stripper and a wire brush on my chminey to give that worn out look. im happy with the result so far!!