Thanks again everyone!! You're all so sweet. Calamity - One thing about pebbles... you have to place them on their edge to make them stay in place. If you lay them flat they will and do pop off. I haven't seen your castle project but will go find it now! :) If I do have a stone that pops out for some reason, I usually just glue it back in with a construction adhesive.

How would I find seeds if there were any? I bought my CCV bloomed already but it grew like CRAZY in the past few months. I just took a neat picture of my vines but I dont know how to post into the messages here. How would I cut it back? Does that mean chop lots off of it? I'll water it like my orchids this winter..... I should try making more of them - with cuttings. Neat. Where do you cut? I'm so nervous to ruin things... I just love my vines lol Thanks for the reply and I'm SURE I'll have some questions. I really want more pretty ones for next year. Or even to start now.... :c)

It's a great place...I renewed my presence there once my kitchen reno again has been delayed by employment issues (i.e., lack of). It spins 1-2 pages per day...blink and you might miss something. A lot of the peeps there have been members since way before iVillage bought gardenweb.com. I was a paid member a few years ago, but lapsed. Found it again when I came here to get kitchen advice.

Dear Paigect, I am another one of those - former stepchild/stepmother. I didn't like my stepfather for a while, but figured things out when I grew up and we had a great relationship before he died of cancer. My first dad was dead when I got him, so there wasn't any wishing to get back together stuff. What role do you think you could play in putting an end to your son's fantasy of you 2 getting back together? Do you think that you could actually help the situation? Or do you just want your ex to be the one to deal with it? I take it you aren't remarried yourself. If you are truly trying to get your son happy and able to have a relationship with his dad- you could help. If your son acts out and is disrespectful to his stepmother and you condone it and blame it on the fantasy and her - you are giving him a message that he can be disrespectful to adults if he chooses not to like them. Do you see that? I have one stepson who is like that, and I have another one who I adore and he a loves me. The difficult one has done things that would curl your hair - choked his girlfriend, stole his dad's gun and got arrested 3 days out of marine boot camp, run around naked, at 16, holding his penis out in front of 10 year old girls thinking he's funny, wrecked cars- twice in one weekend one time, threatened me, runaway and left horrid notes blaming me numerously, got beat up at school for running his mouth and needed to be taken to the med station a number of times, stole his dad's 300.00 fish finder and lost it, lying, partying and skipping school, bad grades, no job, the list goes on and on. When do you say enough is enough? His hell bent goal was to get his dad to divorce me so he could be in charge. He wanted to run things. He blames me for joining the Marines -claims he wanted to get away from me. Now he hates it and it is all my fault. It will be my fault if he gets hurt too. He isn't responsible for any part of our bad relationship or his choices, is he? I am just supposed to take it, the blame and the horrid behavior. His room is a mess from the last time he was home - including used rubbers and half eaten candy bars stuck to the carpet. Oh by the way, his carpet is ruined, there are holes in the walls and his mattress is all chopped up - the new one I bought for him when we moved into our house together. That is all my fault too. Some kids just aren't nice. I must be doing something right though - his brother loves me like crazy. And now you can call me an evil stepmother like he does. Or you can realize that some of us have come to the end of our ropes and patience. You know what? I honestly hold my husband responsible, along with my stepson, for his behavior. If my husband hadn't made excuses for him, made him accountable for his actions and made him take some responsibility, he wouldn't have turned out as bad as he did. I have 2 of my own kids in the house too. They are not bad kids and respect my husband. My ex is out of the picture. It is like I have 3 kids and he has the one. I don't want to leave my husband, because then I couldn't keep my stepson who loves me. The older one is out of the house in the Marines now and it is a whole different household. There is peace. It isn't the his kids vs mine thing. Sure they all pull stuff. But I can discipline now and no one accuses me of being mean and targeting the step kid and other rubbish. It is fair. And there is respect and love that goes both ways. That is the most important thing. No I couldn't respect my older stepson. His repeated behavior wouldn't facilitate it. Every time it would seem to get better - he would pull something and some how he would turn it around and someone else was to blame. Usually me. Yes I am relieved he is in the marines. No, as a matter of fact, I clearly stated I didn't want him to join. He doesn't have good sense and I am afraid for him. But there is a peace in the house. Except of course for my husband. He blames me that his son is gone. But you know what - he is the one who could have refused to let him join. He is the one who could have talked him out of it. He had the influence and the power. Not me. Master manipulator that kid is, huh. Oh, by the way - the boys mother killed herself 3 years ago. She was a drug addict, convicted of embezzlement too. Her choices caught up with her and that was her answer. Now her son is going down her path. I am scared to death for him. I wish someone could help him, but I clearly can't. Maybe the marines will. And when he grows up, maybe he will figure out I wasn't that bad and we can have some sort of relationship. No I won't hold my breath though - I don't want to die, already had that scare with ovarian cancer. Life is too short to be that miserable. Until you walk in someone elses shoes, be careful how you judge them. Some of us have had waaaayyyyy too much to handle with perfect grace. The road to hell is paved with good intentions. That is the path of a stepmother.