Thank you, everyone! And yes, Trailrunner-- exactly-- I work from home teaching online. It is definitely a step in the right direction. My DH was really helpful for the first 2 weeks after the baby was born. Then he went back to work, and stopped helping. He is actually doing less than he did when I was pregnant, which is not that much to begin with at home. I have new jobs now! It has always been this way . . .no surprises. Before we were married, we were engaged but living together. I was working full-time and going to school. I had tons of work to do for work and school at night and on the weekends, but he did not help. Thought he'd change once we had a baby (ha, ha, dumb of me). Thought he'd change once we had a baby and I started working (took the baby with me) AND was going to school. Thought he'd help when he was unemployed for 8 months, and I was still working (with the baby) and going to school. Thought maybe when we had more kids . . .nope. When I took this job 2 years ago, I was 8 months pregnant with DD #4. I thought he would help more, esp. when I actually had the baby-- why? Why did I think that? Obviously I am not a quick study! I'd worked before (from home also, with a baby under a yr) and he did not want to help at all. So, nope, he was just resentful when he had to hold the baby and take over earlier with the other kids so I could do work. This morning, when I woke to find that the dishes weren't finished and there was a big mess to clean up (I did work last night, and then took the baby), it made me more sure of my choice. I cannot even hope he'll change, so I just have to change myself. I admit, however, I am having a hard time not being very resentful. I am hoping that having more time to myself will help. And BTW-- we already went to counseling. When the topic of helping more came up, my DH said he did not want to have to jump right in when he came home from work. (We had a newborn.) Guess what the counselor suggested? That DH get a BREAK when he got home. I could not believe it-- I said, Where is my break? DH got a lunch break . . .a commute . . .I had the kids ALL THE TIME. The day before I went into labor, I had finished presenting my porfolio for my master's. I was not slacking. I made DH admit what I was doing when he "took over." I was doing things like dishes and making dinner. Never was it so that I could have a break! Oh, well. I am finally learning. A long time ago we had decided that I would go back to work full-time once the kids were in school full-time. Seems so reasonable, but now I know I will be doing everything for work AND the house, kids, etc. No way. Good thing I love my kids so much. They inspire me every day.

Hi Jan & Len, Lovely to hear from you again. Unfortunately Im renting this house, so the garden's a bit of a no go project. Other than removing the dreadful clitorea vine taking over the plants in the front garden, man it seeds so well!!!! Yes Holly is at school, preschool actually, five days a week and loving it like you wouldnt believe, made friends so easy and the transition went unbeleivably smoothly!!! I decided to study Law, and it's so intense. Finding it hard to relax after twelve weeks of eating, sleeping and breathing a Law degree!!!! Len, I think I will sell the house, like you I have noticed that sellers of properties go about changing them the minute they get in the door and they end up looking awful. Not going back is a good thing. Think I will buy up here and then get that garden of my own happening. It would be lovely to plan a new garden from scratch. I had to do that in my old place. We've all settled in really well, the two dogs and the cat came with us too, so it's back to being a full house again! Loving it. Cheers, Mel....

I'm with Humsi 100%. Leaving a healthy garden with a 10 day weather forecast, 3weeks is not such a big deal with a plan. bronxbill just asked about tomatoes. But did not mention when the three weeks away begins. If soon, and in the month of June, i see no issues. In the NY area we get on average an inch-2 rain weekly. You can have your cake and have a vacation and a garden. The best method is a simple soaker or drip system on a dial timer and show a neighbor the timer if no rain has occurred in a few days. They just need to turn it on for 1/2 hour-45 min depending on your flow. A self timer is ok but it will water even when not needed. Just get the system well ahead of time so it can be tested. Tomatoes do best under-watered than swamped. I have to leave all the time during the grow season and i just watch the weather while away, then text or e-mail one of two neighbors to turn on the timer. If weather turns hot and we have an unusual drought i have a back-up plan. I just returned from 3 weeks away last night. No watering was needed as i watched the weather. One neighbor added water in my tomato start trays just once mid-trip. All 120 starts look good but i blame no one if something went wrong. It really depends on your climate and the time of the season away. August a few years ago i had a local nursery employee check on things. He scored a bounty of produce. I was willing to pay but after dealing with customers all day he enjoyed a walk through my garden in peace and quiet twice a week. If dry he turned on the drip system right away and harvested. Only once did he leave it on 24hrs. (my water is free). A sprinkler is fine if you know what you are doing. Can be expensive and horribly inefficient in most parts of the country. Not the best system during holiday. Drip systems are very affordable these days. Customizing each plants water needs and can be added to anytime.

You are not a dummy! Far from it, and you know it. Like the rest of us, you just had one of those days. My experience is that most summers I can plant cucurbits all summer long without even looking at the calendar and still get a great harvest. So, plant what you want when you want and see how it does. Usually, melons produce ripe fruit for me much more quickly than the estimated DTMS on the seed packets. I think our intense summer sunlight and high temperatures make them grow and mature faster here than they do in milder climates, especially if the plants are in full sun from sunup to sundown. I am very jealous that you got rain. We didn't. I guess we haven't had any in a couple of weeks now and it really shows. When I go outside in the morning, the cottontail rabbits and birds are waiting for me to fill up waterers so they can have a drink.