I have no advice, but just wanted to say how bad I feel for you. There's nothing worse than a bad contractor...

Hopefully others will chime in to give you some good advice.
Hang in there! :)

Why would it be bad financially? I'm not sure of your payment structure, but normally you pay in installments, at milestones in the job - when he finishes this round that you paid him for already, couldn't you fire him then?

We went through this with our contractor, though we're long distance so I'm not sure how much of it is really him being a slacker and how much is us not being able to verify things since we're far away, and so going on assumptions - we had 2 1 month delays, one was sorta his fault (not on the ball scheduling a sub) but the other was in our opinion because his plumber is a moron. (it took this yahoo a month to figure out how to get our new furnace going.) Both of these probably could have been handled better by him, except he was too busy taking long weekends at his ski house.

But we considered firing him - after the last delay DH sort of implied that was a possibility and gave him a deadline to at least the occupancy inspection (since our builders risk insurance expires) and since then he seems to have a fire under his butt.

have you been too nice? sometimes it's hard to be mean - but sometimes getting angry is what's necessary, you know? and not to disparage all contractors but I believe the vast majority have a hard time with money and organizational skills ;-) because every one we've ever dealt with was the same way LOL.

We're at the 5.5 month point now - he'd estimated 4 months. Of course we never thought 4 was realistic - we are totally renovating the inside, all new systems, walls, floors, insulation, everything. So as long as we're in by Memorial Day. ;-) (summer house.) But I'm totally over it, burned out, tired....so I know how you feel.

Oh, my, don't get me started. We're in month 9 (yes, 9)of a 3.5 month project. More problems than I could begin to list here. Just one thing after another. Horrible subs, lack of supervision, and on and on. Way too many problems to bore you all with, but trust me, it'd make you feel better.

Speaking of making us feel better, I think igloochic's got the record at 3 years for a remodel. I think she deserves a medal from all of us, kind of first place in the "Remodel Olympics".

But just hang in there everyone. All of these little things we're obsessing about today will be distant memories a year from now when we're hanging out in our gorgeous kitchens. Go TEAM!!!

You should be on my build. We are currently working on 5 years. Built the house ourselves, and boy am I sick of it. At this point, I dont even care about the decisions, I just want it done. Luckily Im not living in it so I can get away unlike a remodel job. I also have no one to complain to, but myself. We should be done and moved in this summer. The only plus is no mortgage, paid cash for the build. Good luck to ya all.

Okay, so our remodeling penance is self inflicted but STILL we've been at it for over a year. After realizing that 2 outlets in the kitchen would NOT do, and would be its own level of hell, we started the DIY kitchen/family room remodel. Things went pretty swimmingly in the kitchen and it's so much better that I really didn't think the rest would be bad at all.

Then there was the family room that opens on to the kitchen. The wainscoting was laid horizontally like siding so the plan was to rehang it vertically and add a lovely 4" top trim. Should have been a cake walk. But NOOOOO they put the floor down AFTER the baseboard so the baseboard is lower than the floor!! (so it really couldn't be removed without wrecking it and making the project much larger.) And then they, (previous owners - POs) hung this tongue and groove wainscoting with 4" finishing nails! Dude, it's tongue & groove - you shouldn't really need nails! Trying to pry the bottom layer up and away from the baseboard was a freakin' nightmare! And of course we're trying to be careful because this is really nice wainscoting. Then there were the walls. These people did not know how to mud a drywall seam. We had to redo all the seams in the walls and floor - yuck! But again, it's lovely. So while DH was finishing our new built in desks, I thought I could QUICK remove the silver foil wallpaper from the bathroom and repaint. I'd be done before the weekend was over... right - 3 weeks later! : ) but again it's so much better! That bathroom was throwing out some seriously bad karma to my new kitchen and now it's all harmony. So now we're building a new laundry area off the bedrooms and redoing the guest room - which needs to be done so we can start landscaping around the pool. So I guess while I'm fed up and want the remodeling to be over, we've enjoyed the results and that makes us keep going. And, this little rant has helped too : )

So, I echo seaglass7 - it will be over and worth it! Hang in there!

Thanks everyone - even though I wouldn't wish this on anyone, it's nice to realize others know exactly how I am feeling! Venting makes me feel a bit better also, so maybe if we all vent to each other it will at least prevent us from killing all our contractors - haha :)

Kpaquette - well, it's a long story about why it would be worse for us financially to just fire him. Basically, yes, we've paid him in installments, however at this point we're ahead (didn't plan to be - that much is our fault). He has no organizational skills whatsoever, so we've had to remind him constantly when subs need to be here, where we are with the budget, etc. We realized we were ahead with payments to him when he was wanting us to pay for something that needed to be done. We even recalculated to make sure and then told him that no, we weren't paying for the item due to ALREADY paying him for it!! Now due to him being unable to manage the budget, he has no idea where the money went and doesn't have what he needs to pay for the work that currently needs to be done in order to get the project moving again. So...everything is dragging even though it really could be completed in no more than about 3 weeks. It's funny, but about 3 months ago he estimated that he thought it would be 7 weeks - apparently his skills at estimating time aren't any better than his financial skills. It comes down to us either firing him and paying someone else to finish the work he's been paid for already or dealing with waiting for him to get money from other jobs he's working on in order to do what needs to be done with our project. I'm honestly ready to ask him if he's taken up a drug habit or something since he can't seem to remember exactly what happened to the last payment we made to him!

Anyway, looks like we're all in this together so everyone hang in there! I keep telling myself that it will all be worth it - just not sure when :)

Heh. A "simple" kitchen remodel that was supposed to last about a month is now at 1 year, 3 months and we are still a long way from done. At least I got a functional stove at right around the one year mark. Then we have all the other rooms in the house that we haven't really touched that need to be done.

Chaos reigns supreme.

OH MAN you are scaring me! I am just starting week 4 of what should have been a 2 week project (in a much larger project, but this bit should have only taken 2 wks), and I am starting to go nuts... I can not imagine what some of you all are living with!

I keep telling myself that as soon as we are done with the DUST I will be okay. Its just the dust. If I can make it through the dust...

The (new) walls were finally primered today. Paint should go up tomorrow. That should be the end of the dust, right? Right?

Of course, then there's the floors. Which have to be sanded. More dust.

And even when they're done...there is dust EVERYWHERE. How will I ever get rid of it all? Help?

melanie1422 - sorry to scare you :) I know exactly what you mean about the dust - boy do I know!! We've had dust (and dirt) everywhere for 6 looooonng months and I have no idea how anything is going to be clean again! I keep telling myself that I'll worry about that once the job is entirely completed and every last contractor is out of my house - haha.

I suppose I should be thankful that our project hasn't stretched on as long as some of yours! :) At least not yet!

As kpaquette said, I think we're all probably way too nice when it comes to contractors. I realize there are good ones out there (somewhere), so maybe I shouldn't generalize, but it seems that most of them feel as if there's a lower standard of conduct for them than for others in general. And that once remodeling begins, due to the sheer inconvenience (financially, emotionally and otherwise), that we'll put up with almost anything just to get it finished - no matter how long it takes!

I wonder if the bad contractors are gradually going to be weeded out with the current economy - now that there's not as much demand, hopefully the good ones will be the survivors!

Good luck to everyone - I hope you all eventually finish and are able to enjoy your homes again! :)

We are in year,.....Yes YEAR three on our 3 month remodel. We are hundreds of thousands over budget, we lost a baby due to an accident on site, and suffered a badly broken wrist (thank you dead guy who donated a new wrist bone to me). We have been swindled out of thousands by retailers who've gone out of business with our money in their pocket. We had to buy a second house to live in when this "multi phase so we wouldn't have to move" house became unlivable.

We'll be finished by May I belive. And to show you how sick this remodel disease is...we're buying an even bigger house with two kitchens to gut and 11 bathrooms :oP

Feel better now? :o) You have to be insane to remodel. I didn't of course know that until I was insane....so now I can't stop myself.

Igloochic - have you considered a 12-step program?? Just kidding :) You're right in that people really do have to be insane to some extent to continue to deal with remodeling and putting ourselves through the hell! Good luck with being finished by May, although sounds as if the saga will continue with another house! I have to say that I have no plans for future remodeling if my house is ever finished :) I think I'd rather just jump off a cliff than voluntarily go through all this chaos again in the future!

haha it's definitely a sickness. ;-) We did our last house room by room - everything diy but the kitchen. Our closest friends then totally remodeled their entire house. We commiserated with each other.

Now we bought our summer house, decided to tear a$$ with it, figuring it wouldn't be nearly as bad since we weren't living in it. I don't think ours has been nearly as bad as some of you guys (shheeeeesh igloochic) but it's stressful nonetheless.

Not to be left out, those same close friends decided to buy THEIR summer house, they have just torn the whole thing down (it was a shack) and have just poured the foundation.

I think it's just in you - what, we need to figure out ways to spend our money?? I don't know. DH and I will take a while to recover from this, but how much you wanna bet 10 years from now when we've forgotten how bad it was we're doing it all over again....if not sooner. Our "other" house is temporary, for DHs job, we plan to move to the summer house year round eventually. But if that doesn't go according to plan...

Sounds like the Original Poster is sick of having to manage the GC. Quite understandable.

We JUST finished a remodel with a fabulous contractor, one who blows out a schedule from the beginning of the project and sticks to it and makes sure there are never down days. And it was STILL very intense, stressful, draining and frustrating. It's an incredibly demanding, all-consuming and exhausting process under the best of circumstances.

Few contractors (and we were lucky to find one of them) can manage time, resources, money and their business well. They figure since they were a great carpenter that they can be a great contractor. If you're committed to a contractor who knows construction (most do), but is bad at managing the project (most are), grit your teeth, stock up your liquor cabinet, dig deep, and take over the project management. Weekly jobsite meetings. Set target milestones to be met. A detailed schedule listing every trade that needs to come in, in order. Identify dependencies. It's infuriating that you should have to do it -- that's what GCs are *for* after all, but if you have one that doesn't manage the project, your only choice is to drive it yourself and to get through that frustrated helpless feeling.

I think it's normal for a reno to take about twice as long as it is planned for. The only times that we have finished on time (within six weeks of planned date) are when we've been building shops with lots of well-paid help.

You mentioned that things were going well for a period and then the performance started to suffer. It's important to remember that all of the contractors and tradesfolk that we hire to perform tasks for us are people too. The most successful way of dealing with problems is to get to the root of them and work out a shared solution.

Rather than complain and threaten, try sitting down with a cup of coffee, mentioning that things were working wonderfully initially but that the situation no longer seems to be productive. There may a be a very substantial reason for the problem you're experiencing.

Start by examining your own actions - have you become more difficult to deal with ? As justified as you may feel in doing so, I can guarantee you that unpleasantness on your part will do nothing to motivate your hired help, and go a long way towards alientating them. If you have turned into someone who seems difficult and impatient, well I'd be avoiding your job site as well.

If you are sure that you carry no part of the blame, then explore the contractor's situation with him. Has there been a serious life event that he is having difficulty coping with ? Can you help somehow ?? Not your responsibility to deal with I realise, but we are all human beings. A little compassion costs nothing and never goes unrewarded.

If it is really just laziness or incompetence on the builder's part, then you need to indicate your dissatisfaction with the issues you are encountering. One tactic that I invariably find productive is to ask problem employees or suppliers what they would do in my place if the tables were reversed. The answers I get still educate me after many years.

In the end, as difficult as it may be, you want/need something from this person. Although it may be satisying and feel just that you voice your anger and frustration, it will accomplish nothing. Take the high road and employ your diplomatic skills until the tasks are finished and you no longer have to deal with him.

Good luck !

Renovation is stressful no matter how long it takes -- although I have to hand it to igloochic for hanging in for three years. I am in week three of my renovation (probably will take six instead of four) with a very good contractor but things do happen. In my case it is an old house and we tried to gauge what things will take and cost but it is hard to do until the walls and ceilings come down. Needed new plumbing and electrical (had counted on the electrical not the plumbing) to bring that part of the house to code.

I agree with sailormann that some of it is the homeowner. I made a few changes along the way, which caused some but not all of the delay. In my case, some of the delay is in what is going on in the contracting world today. Subs are letting go of people and then suddenly you are dealing with a different group of people. This happened with our floor company. The guy who originally bid the job in January was laid off in March. Now the bid has to be reviewed to see if it is correct (that will happen Monday).

Fortunately, my contractor and I work through these problems as they are arise and he never gets mad when I say -- you know I have been thinking ...

I personally hate the dust, the loss of privacy, and no dishwasher and one burner. I cook to relax so it has been hard on me. My husband's answer is to make sure he washes dishes as much as possible and has the drinks ready when I get home from work, LOL!! Oh yes, my husband also tells the contractor that he has to tell me what went wrong so my husband is never the bearer of bad news.

I'll start at the end of my story. I fired Guy #1 at the end of month #1 after too many no shows, too much complaining about the job ( yes, the job that he willingly took) and far too little work completed and mine is a small kitchen. "No shows" are just -- wrong. By No Show #3, I had nothing more to say to him other than to state that he owed me back the balance of $1,000.00. I'm not surprised that he didn't return it. I lost the money but I gained peace of mind

So, the dream contractor who did finish my kitchen -- he finished early much to my disappointment. I fully admit having a major crush on him and wanting nothing more than for him to be seriously into overtime -- months and months late -- but it was not to be. Big sigh... :)

A realllly gorgeous, tall, dark Greek man with a thick sing-song accent... Luckily he really did know his away around a kitchen, too. :)
I'm of Greek descent so I became a VIP client automatically -- that's just how it is. Every phone call answered, every appointment kept and every change I made... "You want, OK, so I gonna do... Why you worry?" (I kinda think he treated everyone like that though.)

I will have him back next year to do my master bath. I'm counting the days as I save up the dollars.

Opa!

Opa, where are you located?

Your contractor sounds wonderful. I'd love to have someone who has a work ethic like that.

I definitely think sometimes it's the homeowner. We've made design changes that have extended the time of our project but I don't hold that against my contractor. I'd hope that homeowners would be able to distinguish between delays they caused and delays caused by the contractor. Really even with the delays that weren't OUR fault, I think he's not bad in the big scheme. He does top quality work, doesn't cut corners, wants things done right. I've definitely seen or heard worse. I'd rather have good work that takes too long than crappy work on time (or that takes to long lol) that I have to live with long after that contractor is gone.

Sailormann's advice was good - I do think it's important to have enough communication to know if he has things going on. My contractor now has not shown up because his dog has cancer and he has to drive him 2 hours each way for his treatments, and I don't hold that against him even though it's slowing things down. I have a heart. :-)

I consider myself a pretty nice person - too nice - I'm one of those women who some might consider a pushover, actually. But I don't feel like I should have to hold the hand of my contractor if he's having a rough life. If it were something really serious, like his wife is ill or he just lost his house - something legitimate that would hinder his work, then I'd expect him to tell me about it, even if just to offer an excuse. We dealt with workers just not showing up during our last reno - that's incredibly frustrating. It's a business, and he/she should act professionally. Not showing up without explanation or piddling away my money on another project so he can't do mine is bad business practice, no matter what field you're in.

I am acting as my own general contractor and just learning - but my job should be fairly simple. I am not changing the footprint of anything. In some ways I was unrealistic

I thought - January - tear out
February - electrician and plumber
March - floor up and repaired and painter
April - cabinets, counters, appiances in
May - final electrical and plumbing
June - floor.

I have given up on the backsplash for this year - I just want this done.

It turned into:
January - tear out
February - plumber and electrician - but we don't finish the electrical - we just leave you with holes
March - floor up and subfloor repaired
April - Dry Wall and Paint
May - Floor and Electrician
June - cabinets and counter
July - appliances, plumber
August - done maybe?

I am currently waiting for the floor guy - he came yesterday to repair the floor - told me he was coming at 9:00 showed up about 10:30 - it's only a 2.5 hour job.

But he couldn't bring the trash materials with him nor his equipment. He was going to pick it up at 3:00. He called at 4:15 - he will come Sunday to pick it up - so I am can remain a hostage for yet another day.He was supposed to come at 10:00 - called about 1/2 hour ago that he was on his way. Well where are you.

He is 1/2 the price of anyone else - but well paid let's face it. It only took him 2 hours to get 4 layers of floor up - so he got $100 an hour. And I don't know if I am crazy for having him put my new floor in - he says 2.50 sq/ft, while the floor supplier says 1.00 sq/ft - but I think they are really lying and will charge me more when they are here - a little game.

No way was I gonna pay someone a wad of cash to do a job and not have them show up - everyone gets paid when the work is done. (Except for the cabinets)

Where are you????

LOL Minette your story reminds me of our electrician. Most of you weren't around when my construction project began, but my electrician was the stuff of princely legends :) Gad he was gorgeous. We had all kinds of schemes worked out here on GW on how to get a pic of him with his shirt off. I was to offer water (mind you we had no running water) and spill it on him. I was to turn up the heat (when it was summer and already unbearable). Etc. And part of his gorgeousness was the fact that he was both competent, and really nice. :) My neighbor was considering rewiring her house...she told me she kept trying to find a place to add a light switch every morning when he arrived LOL

I remember once when he remarked that my neighborlady was awfully carefull about keeping the driveway clean (she was up sweeping it every day at his arrival time). LOL She's never swept it since he finished :o)

Oh Igloo, that's so funny! I was also pulling every trick in the book to get my Greek god to show up between appointments, too. And you're right, the niceness truly completes the -- ahem -- picture!

I love your bit about trying to get him shirtless! I actually caught mine like that unexpectedly one time. Um. Whoa. Apollo alert.

I have apparently hired the wrong workers. Who knew that I should have asked for a shirtless photo before hiring?

Igloo, a new house with two kitchens and 11 bathrooms? Wow. Are you bringing the hunky electrician with you to the new house?

I did have a group of very attractive guys working on the backyard of my old house. My roommate and I came home one day and there were 4 or 5 of them, shirtless and working hard. We poured some lemonade, sat on the deck, and enjoyed the show. I'm not sure they were aware we were watching them...but I was glad we came home when we did!

Sailorman - I'll try to address some of the issues you brought up. Yes, we've definitely considered practically every scenario (as well as asked our contractor) as far as why the project started going downhill. That's not to say that it was perfect at first, just that we at least made significant progress over the first 3 months, compared to very little the past 3 1/2. As far as we can tell (we can only go with what info we are given), there is nothing going on with him personally that would affect the job this much. Other than the financial mess of course. As for that, we've offered to work with him in any way possible, short of simply coughing up more money than was even in the bid when he has no idea (or isn't saying) where it has gone. We've gone way over budget in many areas, but that's accounted for - we knew that would be the case when we started.

As for the not showing up for the job, well, in my opinion, that's not acceptable for any reason. I sometimes have to work with people that I'd rather not and I can't just decide not to show up for my job several days a week and NOT EVEN CALL! And if I specifically say that I will be there the next day (such as on the weekend), I will either be there on time or at least call with a GOOD (meaning something more than I just didn't feel like it) excuse. I don't consider us to be difficult to work with as homeowners and if anything, we're probably more guilty of being too friendly and accommodating, so he's become accustomed to that.

Lastly, as for project delays, we'll take blame for anything we cause such as deciding to make major changes or not being able to decide on something quickly enough, however so far that has not been the case. During the project, we've taken care of ordering every single thing in a timely manner including sinks, faucets, lighting, tile, appliances, etc and all have been sitting in our house for months. The cabinets are waiting to be intalled and granite has also been sitting at the fabricator's warehouse for months. So...not sure what else we could do to move this along.

Sorry - I don't mean to sound defensive. It's just very frustrating to realize at this point that we might as well have served as our own GC and avoided any additional fees! I do appreciate the input and suggestions!