This was in our local paper and I just had to share part of it with OJ and everyone else!
On the Record (Oscoda Press)
by Jim Dunn
The Recessions's Not Over Until Men Start Buying New Underwear
I read an interesting economic analysis this week which claimed that the most historically dependable benchmark indicating the end of a recession is the sale of men's underwear.
It seems that the analysts who keep track of the sales numbers of our jockey shorts and then compare them to the nation's economy have proven beyond a reasonable doubt that underwear is the every last thing on the list of things for which men are willing to fork over their hard-earned cash.
They - the underwear, not the men - can be tattered, stained and borderline disgusting, but the purchase of a new fishing pole or new off-road tires or even a bottle of the latest formula of doe-in-heat scent is going to come first.
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So, according to the statisticians, when the majority of men start buying new underwear, it's because they've all ready purchased all the "I really gotta have this" items and they have enough cash left to buy the "I suppose I really should break down and buy this before my wife kills me, or worse yet, buys it for me" type of purchase.
And when that happens, the recession MUST be over.
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