I applaud you for thinking this through carefully and considering all options. Like you, my cats generally just "show up" in my life. In fact, the last time I specifically choose a feline after shopping around was when I was 13 yrs old. I wouldn't give up a single one of the felines with whom I have shared my life. I am honored to have been chosen by so many over the decades.

That said, if I were ever in a position to go "cat shopping" again at some point, I'd still allow the cat(s) to choose me. I'd probably go to a well run shelter or cat rescue and visit with the available felines. I would try to avoid having any preconceived preferences, because they'd almost certainly be negated by the animals themselves. For instance, as much as I would love to adopt a tortie, that pathetic little three-legged male grey tabby in the corner cage who grabbed my shirt sleeve and wouldn't let go would be the one I knew was destined to join my family.

I believe that cats are extraordinarily empathetic creatures. They read us and know when they have found their human match. My recommendation is that you allow yourself to be chosen.

Laurie

All the cats we had chose us---in one way or another. Whether from a litter, from the pound, or from the street---the cats told us we were sufficiently acceptable humans they could live with us.

At the pound, we just walked around, the interested cats would come to the door of their cage and what ever happened was the key. From a litter is the most fun, tho. Sit down and see which one chooses you.

I am not a current cat owner, but when I got my previous cats, I remember thinking: I would never get another kitten. I would adopt an older cat because then you can tell their personalities better. i.e. mellow, hyper, friendly, etc.

If the idea of allowing the feline(s) to choose you seems a bit too obscure for you, I have a few more practical suggestions for you to consider.

First, I believe the most selfless option - just because so few people would ever consider it - would be to adopt two adult cats who were given up for adoption together from the same home. Such cats are already bonded and would be happiest rehomed together, but sadly they usually either get separated and adopted or get euthanized because there are just too few homes for adult cats. As sc_gardener noted, you'll have a much better idea of the personalities of the cats when adopting adults, and you'll be adopting from the least adoptable shelter population.

If you decide on kittens, I recommend that you NOT adopt two males. Both my ex-husband and I have adopted two sibling male kittens. In both cases, the brothers got along great as kittens but matured into bully/victim adults. In my ex's case, the bully became so aggressive toward his victim brother that my ex had to rehome one of them for the victim's protection.

Females are a bit different. I have three female littermates who I raised from early kittenhood. They are now 12 yrs old. BooBoo gets along with both of her sisters, but her sisters do NOT get along with each other. Unlike bully/victim male siblings, though, females don't generally go looking for trouble with each other. They only squabble when they inadvertantly get up close and personal while moving around the house.

In my experience, male/female littermates usually don't squabble at all, and they may bond very closely when raised together.

Of course all of these are generalities that don't tell you anything about a specific animal's personality or behavioral quirks. There are brothers who bond very tightly and adore each other throughout their lifetimes. I have no doubt there are brother/sister teams who fight like cats. That, again, is one of the benefits of adopting adult cats with mature personalities. You have a much better idea of what you're getting with an adult.

Laurie

I applaud you for thinking about adopting adults! I've adopted a few over the years and never regretted it. We now have a pair of siblings, brothers, that came to us at 11 weeks, they are totally devoted to one another. They lie by the door each evening, watching the wildlife and they must be touching....either up against one another or tail crossed, it's cute. They are 1 1/2 now and love to romp and play, what a joy they are!

Good for you for wanting to give an orphan a home. Do you want a cat that cuddles with you or one who is independent with personality? Kittens change as they grow older and some of them from shelters may be semiferal and not well trusting of humans as I've found my current fur baby to be; personality plus, playful and funny but not really cuddly. As they get older their personality is set and chances are they will be friendler if they choose you. I think whatever you choose, you will come to appreciate and love his(her)distinctive personality and bond in a special unique way.

When I first saw this title, my first thought was that you don't choose the cat. The cat chooses you. For the most part, that's how it's been with me. The universe simply hands me cats, sometimes as strays or surplus kittens....

If I go out to choose a cat, often it's because I have a vacancy and a lonely cat at home. I'll go to the shelter and look around at all the cats and kittens, talk to them, see who I'm interested in, and who's interested in me. When I adopted Cocoa, I spotted this gorgeous cat in a cage and talked to him. He got up, meowed, came to the front of the cage, meowed, and patted my fingers with his paw. There was this instant rapport. He was an adult, btw, 2 years old. A lot of the cats I've adopted have been adults.

The one time I let my head overrule my heart and didn't wait for this sense of rapport, it was a mixed success. I saw a photo of a beautiful Ragdoll on a shelter's website. I went down to look at him, and spoke to a counselor that I already knew from somewhere else. This beautiful pedigreed cat was an owner-relinquish. He was scrawny and underweight. His fur was dirty, matted, and oily. He didn't bond with me or even interact a lot, but I put that down to his being undernourished and probably badly treated, as well as the stress of being in the shelter.

I took him home. He's now a good weight. His fur looks healthy and shiny. He's contented, and he gets along and plays with the other cats.

But he never really bonded with me. When I pick up the other cats, nine times out of ten they'll snuggle in and purr. But this guy will either not do anything at all, just accept my attentions until I'm done and he can get away, or he'll actively struggle to get away from me.

So I think that sense of rapport is one of the strongest indications of which cat or cats should go home with you.

My first two cats chose me...and we were the best of friends. When I first graduated college and started working I went to a local pet store that had kittens "free" to a good home, as long as you purchase at least $25 of merchanidise. Having been without a pet for my college years, it was no problem to find $25 worth of stuff I would need to make a cat happy. One by one I picked up all the kittens, but the one that came home with me was the little guy who rested his chin on my shoulder, closed his eyes and immediately started purring. Six years later, while riding my bike, I came across the scrawniest little kitten who ran after me mewing like crazy. Those two were the best darn cats in the whole world, and sadly I lost them both last year to liver disease and cancer respectively.

To cheer me up after the losses, my S.O decided we should adopt a kitten from one of my neighbors, and although I had a gut feeling it wasn't the right thing to do he was adamant, so to keep the peace I agreed to it. This kitten has been such a little monster, I have even tried to adopt him out! But I am optimistic it will all work out. :o) So trust your gut, the right cat will pick you.

I have had mostly good luck over the years. Some I picked and some picked me..The last one who wasn't a rescue is the one I like the least. I never bonded with this cat. I've had my favorites and I got a 4 week old kitten last year along with his brother and raised them for three months in my carriage house. My mean DH didn't want me to keep either but i did keep one.He turned out to be a real love and I regret not keeping his brother who was adopted out by the rescue group. Most of my rescues have been friendly and found me. Only one of those didn't work out and after two years had to go to another home. It's really the luck of the draw. My DD had the meanest most horrible cat that I have ever seen. He snarled and growled and i never would have put up with it but they did till he died. He was just plain nasty. I have never had a mean cat. But usually if you treat them well, they will be sweet.

My cats chose me. I met a lovely (but stand-offish) tortie up for adoption at the vet's clinic, and decided to go pick her up the next day (didn't have a carrier with me the day I saw her).

DH and I went over to her cage, and before we knew, a scrawny lil kitten with a Zorro mask was meowing like mad, holding my sleeve thru the cage. That's how Max came home. He's the sweetest, most intelligent cat I've had.

Our other cats are strays that we did not send to Feline Friends for adoption, and they're all total sweethearts. When we found Simba, we didn't even discuss if we wanted to keep him - he slept in my lap from day one, and now he's grown into a lanky 6kg handsome boy, still sleeps in my lap, sucking his tail, demands my attention, talks to me, sits on my shoulder.

I believe fate/destiny has a part to play in all this. The right cat will pick you, I'm sure. And then, we'll want to see pictures! :)

Pranjal

My sister's friend had two pregnant females show up. Sis took a carrier to get a kitten. While they were trying to get it out from under a shed, one from the other litter got in the carrier. She said, "I guess I'll take this one." It's been good. The dog isn't too thrilled, just tries to stay away from it.

Her DH came home the next day and asked the dog, "Where's our little jewel?" So her name is now Jewel.

I'm glad you're getting another kitty.

My first two cats, my old guys, were chosen for me - both strays, my brother found one and my sister the other - they arrived in my home 4 months apart and bonded instantly (they've been best buds now for almost 16 years). Our new boy who we adopted last Christmas came to us after careful thought. One of our old boys is in end-stage renal failure and his buddy is Mr. Happy Cat and I knew that if we lost our sick guy Mr. Happy Cat would be devastated and it wouldn't be good for him. He'll still be devastated but now he'll at least have some cat company to help him get through it - he won't be alone during the day. I considered it for months before finally deciding it was time and at that point I looked up the webpages of various local humane societies as all have photos on their websites of cats they currently have up for adoption. I ended up finding our new guy at the HS in the town where my DH's parents live - shelter is less than 5 minutes from their house actually. When I saw his picture on the website something just made me stop and I kept going back to him so I told my DH that we had to have him - an orange tabby named Pumpkin (I've been owned by an orange tabby before and we had another orange & white we nicknamed Pumpkin so it seemed like fate - crazy, I know!). But when we met him he snuggled under my chin and started purring like a semi-truck. He's an absolute doll and we're so glad he joined our family. He's about 8 years old (we didn't want a kitten or too young a cat because of our old boys) and unfortuntely he's sick himself (heart condition) but he's a perfect fit. So maybe troll the webpages of your local animal shelters and see if any kitties you see jump out at you. And I'm definitely all for adopting older kitties - our new boy was in the shelter for 15 months before we came along.

tess

We have two cats and didn't "choose" either of them. They were both rescues that needed a home. When we first took in Jake our manx we just fell in love with him and were looking for a cat at the time. A friend of ours found him along side the road in the middle of now where. He was maybe 2 months old.
Lilly on the other hand...we weren't looking for another cat but were asked to take her in. She was too little to be without her mom and wouldn't survive unless someone took her in. I had to bottle feed her for the first week and a half. She's now a year old and we are head over heels in love with our little girl.
Good luck!

My first cat, chose me. I had actually wanted a different cat, but was not allowed. My father for some reason believed cats at the shelter who were old enough to have been outside cats for a while, would be trouble.

Zoey picked me. She climbed all over me and purred, while her littermates just wanted to play with toys.

My second kitty. I had gone to petsmart and saw just about the cutest kitten I have ever seen. Still to this day, he was darn cute. He was being adopted out for the SPCA. So I decided to go the SPCA to look for littermates. And good thing I did. I immediately spotted my black little friend ( I disliked black cats) Climbing her cage, squealing at me and purring at the top of her lungs. I took her out and she was fearless. Jumping on everyone and everything, off of really high things, onto high things. Just a bundle of energy, and she came back to me constantly.

So I took her home.

I would have loved to adopt an adult cat, however, with our circumstances, it really wasn't a great idea. 3 other cats who were just getting used to being with other cats, a puppy and an older dog who had just realised cats weren't for chasing. Not to mention our roommates were moving out soon, and there was going to be several babies in and out of the house. I was unable to find an adult I liked who had a good enough history for me to trust that they wouldn't be traumatized in our household.

Adults are good if you know they get along well with children, dogs and other cats, or don't have any of those things. Our shelter is a no-kill, so I didn't feel bad leaving the adults to find other forever homes. The possible trauma to them wasn't worth it.

IMHO....

1) The cat will interview you and determine if you are suitable as his/her staff.

2) The second half of a cat's life is the best for the staff. You should only allow yourself to be interviewed by cats who are at least six years old. Kittens are demanding tyrants as bosses, and get away with it by being so cute.

3) There are lots of great cats out there. If one doesn't care to hire you, don't push the issue. Just move on to the next. It probably won't take long to find one.

LOL susanjn.