I would do it, only if YOU are prepared to take and keep the cat in the event that she doesn't want it, doesn't have the time to take care of it once she is better, or anything to that degree.

Is there any way you can get pictures of all the kitties in the shelter, and let her choose her own?

If your sister is very ill in bed most of the time, I can't imagine that she needs the extra stress of caring for an animal right now. Is she up to feeding and watering the cat daily, cleaning the litterbox daily, and providing the cat with affection and play stimulus daily? If the worst case scenario should occur and your sister does not recover, what will become of the cat then? If your sister ends up in the hospital, who will take on responsibility for the cat?

I can understand your wanting to provide your sister with the comfort of a feline companion while she is strugglling, but I would think long and hard about whether the timing is fair to either her or a cat.

My suggestion would be for you to wait until your sister is at least recovered enough to handle the daily care of the cat comfortably herself.

Best wishes to you and your sister,

Laurie

If she has someone who will take care of the cat's daily physical needs, and if you are prepared to take care of the cat if things don't work out as planned, I would say go for it!! Having a cat to keep her company might be just what she needs to give her a boost, and a reason to get better quickly. But in any event, you should definitely discuss it with her first.

Wait until your sister is on the mend and then ask her if this is the right time to introduce a companion animal. If you are uncertain that she will recover, it is certainly not the right time to burden her with a pet and it is not in the best interest of the cat.

I do not think it is every a good idea to choose a pet for another person. You may know your sister very well, but she may look for traits in an animal companion that suits her "at home alone" personality. Do you know if she would want a quiet 'lap cat' to cuddle and keep her company? Or one who would add high energy and excitment to her household when she is alone?

A person had to "click" with their pet and should meet the animal first.

You do not even know if she would want and animal as part of her household. Have you asked her yet?

Half of the cats I have adopted over the years came from people who got one as a gift and they never wanted it.

Shelters and rescue groups will not allow a pet to be adopted as a 'gift' anyway. I hope that your sister is better soon, and that you can help her to pick out a pet when she is ready to care for one.

Pets are a lot of wonderful things however pets are terrible gifts.

I am going to go with the wait until your sister is feeling better.

When you pick out a kitten there is no way to tell if it will be a quiet lap kitten or a crazed bouncing off the walls kitten (I've had both) and when picking them out, had no idea what they would be like 2 weeks after we brought them home and they were settled in and comfortable with their new surroundings.

Although I agree a pet is great company and very good for one's health, it may not help to burden your sister when she's really not feeling up to the care needed, especially if you are considering a kitten. It may be too much for her at this time.

Let your sister get better and then suggest a pet.

I am really against pets as a "surprise" gift. I received my middle child as a birthday gift. However, he wasn't a surprise, I wanted him, I picked him out, etc. A surprise pet may not be as well received as you would hope.

I hope your sister is feeling better soon!

Hope your sister is feeling better soon.

I also agree with waiting until she's better and seeing if she wants or can handle a new cat or kitten at that point.
It would be sad for her and for the cat if she were unable to care for it.

Thank you for your opinions/observations. I have a difficult decision to make which is even harder as I'm so emotionally involved. I really need an objective perspective to evaluate the situation.
Hopefully, my sister will get better, in reality she may not. Currently she is unable to care for herself much of the time and has a paid live-in companion/housekeeper. She is a dear retired lady who prepares meals & does light housekeeping in exchange for room & board & a small wage. She is keen on the cat idea & would tend to most of the daily needs. Family members help out on a regular basis, everyday. No doubt my sister would like to have a cat, something she's always wanted but couldn't. I would, if I go ahead, get an older cat rather than a kitten. Looks are unimportant, but a mushy, cuddly personality would be desirable. Our mom and housekeeper have both said they'd give the cat a good home should the worst happen. Due to their daily interactions with the cat, there would be a bond & some familiarity. At least, that's what I think & an unwanted cat, so to speak, would be a companion & well-cared for in return.
Ivy

If your sister's companion would welcome the extra care and time that she'll have to give to a cat, and, if your sister really wants one (and is not allergic and can incur the expense), and the cat will be assured a good home if anything would happen so that your sister could no longer keep the cat, I think that rescuing an older cat from a shelter or a rescue group is a great idea.

Your sister's companion and you could go together to pick out the cat.

A loving animal might do wonders for your sister's spirits and would give a home to an otherwise homeless cat. Just ask your sister first if she wants a cat.

bbaird, your reply is music to my ears. I see my sis twice/wk, sometimes three. She always says that she has one regret, not having a cat, she has always wanted but would have been unfair due to her hours. Her housekeeper is actually very excited about the possibility of a cat joining the family as she is an animal lover. Money for care, is not an issue for my dear sis. I'm thinking now, maybe on a good day, she can pick out the cat.
Ivy

I know I'm probably being selfish. I am willing to do almost anything to lift my sister's spirits, & prolong her life. I truly think animals have amazing healing powers. Please note I wouldn't just 'use' a poor animal, but in this case I think there would be two winners.
Ivy

Considering the additional information you have provided, it sounds like adopting an affectionate, older cat might be just what the doctor ordered for your sister. Just make sure to double check with her first to make absolutely certain that this is something she wants right now under current circumstances.

I don't know exactly what your sister's current condition is, but if she is very vulnerable to infection, you might want to choose a cat who has already been declawed to reduce the risk of an accidental scratch. I am personally strongly opposed to declawing, but if the cat you adopt is already declawed, that particular damage has already been done.

Make certain, also, that your sister's current condition does not preclude cuddling. I had a friend who died of breast cancer, and in the latter stages of the disease her skin became so fragile and hypersensitive to touch that she could not tolerate anyone touching her, not even her beloved dog. It was horribly difficult on all concerned.

But if those issues do not apply to your sister, and she wants a feline companion to share love with during this time, then I think it would be a wonderful gift to give to both her and a lucky cat.

Laurie

Since you brought up the housekeeper, I think it's an excellent idea..I'd go for an older mellow cat and there are many of those out there. Many times there are ads in the paper or at rescue groups where the owner died or went into a nursing home..I firmly believe in the healing power of animals. I had a friend with breast cancer and her dog and cat laid on the bed with her all the time. Plenty of these cats are out there. I in fact had one I fostered for two and a half years and would've kept in a heartbeat, but she fought constantly with my other female cats. I turned her over to the foster group and after five weeks at Petsmart , last night she was adopted to a young couple with no kids or animals. Izzy would have been a perfect cat, loving and affectionate, a couch potato and loves people. I say go for it and you're a wonderful sister. Hope it makes a difference.

After considering all the information given, I am 90% certain that getting an older, mellow cat is the right thing to do. After all most people, in my opinion anyway, have major regrets when they are seriously ill. All my sister really wants is a cat to love. I think I'll start searching for a cat that needs my sis as much as she needs him/her tomorrow.
Thank you all so very much for giving me your point of view. I believe it is the right thing to do.
Ivy

Your animal shelter many not even let you adopt if you tell them it's for somebody else as a gift.

I agree, please check with your sister's docs to be sure this is an okay thing to introduce into her environment.

Cats use the litter box and carry alot of germs. If your sister's immune system is impaired at all, you might want to just get the okay before proceeding.

Good luck.

Your best bet in finding the right cat may be to find a shelter that has their cats in foster homes. That way they can honestly tell you how the cat reacts in a home situation and with other people.

I'm not sure a declawed cat is a guarantee of less injuries. Declawed cats tend to become biters since they've lost their defense of claws and the owners have to learn to read the cues as to when they may bite. I worked many years with a rescue group and nearly every declawed cat we took in had become a biter. Even my DM's cat has become a biter over the last year and it's just her and my DM! DM now know the subtle signs of when kitty doesn't want to be petted and is ready to leave her lap.

I wish the best for your DS and hope she recovers. She's blessed with a loving family...........

It sounds as if your sister has an excellent environment and plenty of help for a cat. All of us here can attest to the soothing comfort that a loving kitty gives.

Just one thing to keep in mind. Cats usually (not 100% of the time, but usually) respond best to those who are tending them, in particular feeding them. They quickly learn who is filling and setting out the food bowl - and that's often the person whom they love best! So if it would possible for your sister to feed them as frequently as she can, that would help the cat to bond with her and come to her for cuddles.

It's a beautiful thing for you to fulfill your sister's wish, and I hope that you will find the perfect loving kitty to be with her through this time.

Please keep us updated -- about your sister's health and about finding her a cat.

We love pictures :)

Thanks again for your advice. I have contacted a rescue with foster homes, checked the paper & contacted local vets. One vet knows of a cat, a much loved long-haired calico companion that may need a new home due to the current owner, having to move into a care facility. He said it is a very mellow, calm male about 7 yrs old that has been neutered/declawed/up-to-date-shots. Apparently the elderly lady had inquired about putting up an ad on the bulletin board for a new home for Mikey. This sounds very promising. Don't know all the details, so far, but if this works out, I'd like to somehow keep this lady a part of the cat's life. I know I'm getting ahead of myself, but if possible, I'd bring her for visits.
I will keep you posted. As of yet, I haven't let my sis know as I don't want to get her hopes up. Mikey might be the one.
Ivy

A MALE calico? Are you certaiin you understood correctly? Male calicos are exceptionally rare and, according to my vet, are genetically "Down's Syndrome". My vet has never seen a male calico in 20 yrs of practice, only read about them in vet journals.

Sounds great to me..calicos and Torties are almost always female, but if not they are usually sterile. Sounds like a good age and a good answer to your situation. Good luck.

HMM? That's a good question. I did not realize a calico was a breed, thinking instead it described a specific color. He said it was a longish-haired mostly white male with a blotch of tabby gray, & orange with a multi-colored raccoon-like tail. I assumed that was called a calico, so I will need more info. You guys are so awesome.
Ivy

Calico is a color, not a breed, but there is a genetic link between calico (and tortoiseshell) coloration and female gender. Both color patterns are exceedingly rare in males.

Calico IS a color, not a breed, but with the bushy tail you described, he may be part Maine Coon and that is a breed, and they are usually very gentle and laid back.

ivyvinesplus you don't say what your sisters illness is. Have you talked to her doctor about bringing a pet into the home?

You say you talked to shelters, talk to her doctors first. Her health is more important than a pet right?

"Your best bet in finding the right cat may be to find a shelter that has their cats in foster homes"

Excellent idea. Lots of shelters have foster programs they use before placing animals in permanent homes.

As long as your sister's paid live-in companion/housekeeper is willing to help care fo the cat, I think its a good idea.

gammyt- You make a good point. Actually it was one of my sister's doctors that suggested getting a pet, tending/raising some houseplants, taking up a hobby such as needlework/scrapbooking etc., as being very beneficial for my sister. Since she is no longer working, she is rather "depressed" & can only do so many puzzles, read or watch tv, so long, without getting bored. He feels having a "purpose" can do wonders. So far, we have gotten her some African Violets to grow along with some assorted plants & care books. She is trying to propagate some leaves according to the instructions in the book. Everyday, she is anxious to see how things are progressing. P.S. She makes a special effort to tend those plants & I feel taking care of a cat, though limited, she could feed, brush, cuddle, play (though we'd do litter etc.) would be good for her.

Ivy

*WARNING*

Many plants are toxic to cats.

For example, lilies are LETHAL. They kill quickly.

She probably shouldn't be tending to plants and a cat at the same time without knowing the toxicity of the plants.

Cats are curious and could easily eat the plants/flowers.

The cat should also have its own wheatgrass "plant" at all times. This doesn't mean that the cat won't also eat the other plants/flowers. You can accidently expose the cat to the toxins, too from your tending to the plants

Please be careful.

Just to let everyone know my dear sis now has Mickey. We got him a week ago, Saturday. He took to my sis, like a fish to water. He luvs to lounge in bed with her, & bats treats around as if he's playing floor hockey when she tosses them to him. He enjoys being brushed each day & seems very content. If ever there was a match, intended to be, this is one. We do feel sad, though, for the sweet lady that had to give up her Mickey. She is still waiting on a placement, but seems to be coping well, while making new adjustments & is grateful Mickey has a good home. My sis is glowing these days. Thanks all for your advice.

Since I have read all the posts, and made it this far, I will say it anyway. Did you ever discuss this with your sister? Did she get to choose? Would the shelter have allowed you to take out some cats for a visit so she could have a say?

Ok, I know it is over, and I hope you will let us know when your sister is on her way to recovery. I also hope you will watch her relationship with the cat, and take it off her hands if you see that it is causing stress for her.

Sammy

Ivyvines, I think you did a wonderful thing for your sister. And also for Mickey and his previous human, it must be such a relief for her to know he has a wonderful new home.

Sammy,The lady that had to give up Mikey (not Mickey sp. mistake) called me as I had asked the vet to give her my phone #. I met her & Mikey & took a roll of pics on a disposable camera, which I showed my sis & related the story. Yes, she wanted to meet him & provide a home. All is working out well, so far, knock on wood. My sister is terminally ill, & not expected to recover, but we have hope that she will beat the odds. Both her hired live-in helper & my mom are willing to adopt Mikey if/when needed. Both spend lots of time with him, so he has bonded with both. Mikey's old mom is aware of the situation & actually has visiting rights where a family member picks her up every two weeks for lunch and a visit.

What a nice story thank you.

Boy. I'm so sorry about your sister's prognosis.

I hope that Mikey brings her all the joy she needs and vice versa.

Thanks to both of you, for your kind comments. Mikey has lifted my DS's spirits & also brought together two families in a very difficult situation. I don't get here often, but do appreciate your positive thoughts. Everyone, please note that my sis, & her older cat Mikey as well as his first "mom" are all doing well. Mikey's "old" mom is such a dear lady who just loves Mikey, & her family is not nearby.
Ivy

Bless you, Ivy. I am so very sorry to hear about your sister, and am happy that she has so much family around her. You all must bring her so much pleasure, and who knows? People beat the odds everyday.

Sammy

I'll bet Mikey will help your sister beat the odds..

Got a call from my mom as I was leaving work today. Mikey was not his usual self today. He was, according to mom, looking "depressed" if that's possible & lethargic & didn't have his usual robust appetite. He is at the vet's now & will stay overnight while he undergoes blood tests & an evaluation as to what could be wrong. I sincerely hope it is nothing serious. I will see my sis on Saturday, and hopefully Mikey will be home by then. I haven't spoken to her yet, but mom says she is heartbroken & very sad as she awaits news.

What are they feeding him?

It should be California Natural, Felidae, etc.. -- all without wheat/wheat gluten.

There have been major recalls the past few weeks.

PLEASE CHECK!

OMG! Are you saying it could be the food causing this ailment? Honestly, I'm kind of embarrassed to say, I don't know the name of the food, but mom & I brought Mikey to the vet for a checkup prior to bringing him to my sister's. At the time, mom purchased food from the vet which was rather pricey, but apparently superior to the supermarket brand food Mikey had been eating. He was doing so well. Easter is a time of "New Beginnings" & HOPE to me. Wouldn't the vet have known the food was bad? I am beginning to feel so very sad. We are heading out the door to visit DH's family & will be computer-less til Saturday.

Ivy

More and more brands are being added to the list of recalls each day -- 2 culprits: wheat/wheat gluten & certain plastics.

Also, lilies are lethal to cats. They can cause death within a day.

Please advise the vet if you have lilies in the house. Just some thoughts as to what could cause acute illness.

Good luck.

Let us know.

Here's a resource for recall information...

Here is a link that might be useful: Recall Info

I'm sending positive thoughts both to your sister and to Mikey. I hope they're both progressing well. Definitely keep up on the recall news. Even some of the premium brands are tainted. I feed my cat Purina Naturals, and that's made with corn gluten, so it's not on the recall list.

I remember how depressed my grandmother was when my grandfather died, until an alley cat adopted her. Because he was an outdoor cat primarily, a few years later he fell afoul of a car, but while my grandmother had him she visibly perked up, became more interested in life, and couldn't give in to grief and depression because Dur needed to be fed. Dur wanted out. Dur wanted back in again. Dur wanted to play. Dur wanted up on her lap. Dur had to be petted. He was demanding, but he needed her and loved her. He made such a difference in her life.

Pets are natural healers. Can't really argue against warm cuddles, soft purring, and fluffy hugs.

I wish your sister and Mikey the best.

lilacs of may, I love your GW name. I missed your post which I came upon just today as I am thinking of Mikey and all that has happened & reliving moments in my mind. Mikey was everything & more that Dur was to your grandmother. Mikey, also made such a difference in my sister's life. He seemed to be a miracle, & then hearts were broken.

What happened...???? Did he pass away from the food or...???? Maybe I missed the answer in a new post..going to look

Please give us an update....Your last post didn't look good...

Mikey had kidney failure. We tried everything, even though the vet said it was pointless to try, to save him. We only had him for a few weeks & didn't see any signs of illness. We are told that cats conceal their ailments, but that isn't much comfort. He was such a joy for the short time he was with us. Rest in peace Mikey.