Well, the party line answer is clearly both, and obviously for me too, there is enjoyment of the process and the results. I think that must be true for any gardener who is involved in the making of their own garden space and who isn't getting paid for doing it. But I find that as I get older and farther down the garden path, I would like to enjoy the results more, and I find that the process itself can sometimes be tedious, expensive, require too much patience, and overwhelming. So I am going to be brutally honest here -- while I enjoy the work of gardening to some extent, if I could hire more people to do more things for me and just enjoy the results myself, I would do it. The problem is that, for the most part, if you are a real plant geek like I am (and a whole lot of others who responded above), you can't really hire people to arrange plants for you in the way you want them. So there is a certain amount that you have to be involved with yourself. Being involved again in the creation of a new garden, and having left a mature one, I have to say that so far, I enjoyed the mature one more. The last few years I spent there I did work a lot in the garden still, of course, but the proportion of time spent just enjoying the garden was greater. That doesn't mean that I was sitting when I enjoyed it. It doesn't mean that I didn't pull a weed or two when I walked with a glass of wine in the evening. But after 20 years working on that space, the garden felt "finished" to a great extent. That doesn't mean that there would never be anything new. But the garden had a certain cohesiveness that is certainly lacking in my new garden. It also had as much seasonal interest as I could pack into 2/3 acre in my rotten climate. So, weather permitting, the garden always had moments of great beauty and enjoyment for me. But then again, I know that one of the reasons the garden meant so much to me is that I had spent 20 years making it. I had watched the trees, shrubs, perennials that I had planted get moved from one place to anohter (NAY he says, "I MOVED them from one place to another"...) until they finally found a place that they (and I) liked. Still garden making takes patience, and it is hard in the early stages not to want more results, with less work at garden making. I think that's one reason why, relatively speaking, I did not take many pictures of the new garden this year -- in the last year I was at my old place I took over a thousand, this year less than 100. A reflection that the garden was more about process than results, so far. One of the greatest times of garden enjoyment I ever remember in my old garden was after a big garden tour. The weeds were all pulled, the plants all relatively pristine (it was mid-June), the crowds were gone, my family and the dog were gone, the walks and drives all neat and clean, no cars or other distractions to be seen. Then I walked through and enjoyed my own garden, for a couple of hours, nobody but me and the hummingbirds and butterflies. One of the best times of garden enjoyment I ever had, along with very early foggy mornings and late summer evenings. Give me more of those, and less back-breaking work, any day....

I've only made this once for some reason. It's very good! Chicken-Pecan Quiche (Debbie/AL) Crust:* 1 c. flour 1 c. (4 oz.) shredded Cheddar 3/4 c. chopped pecans 1/2 tsp. salt 1/4 tsp. paprika 1/3 c. vegetable oil Mix first four ingredients in a medium bowl; stir well. Add oil and stir well. Firmly press mixture in bottom and up sides of a 9" deep-dish pie plate. Bake at 350 for 12 minutes. Cool completely. Filling: 1 c. sour cream 1/4 c. mayonnaise 3 large eggs, lightly beaten 2 c. finely chopped cooked chicken 1/2 c. (2 oz.) shredded sharp Cheddar cheese 1/4 c. minced onion 1/4 c. pecan halves 3 drops of hot sauce (optional) Whisk together sour cream, mayo and eggs. Stir in chicken, cheese, onion and hot sauce. Pour chicken mixture over the prepared crust. Arrange pecan halves over chicken mixture. Bake at 350 for 55 min. or until set. Let stand 10 minutes before serving. Serves 8. *Deep-dish premade pie crust can be substituted for the cheese/pecan crust. Just sprinkle the bottom of the pie crust with 1/2 c. shredded cheese and add the other half (making 1 c.) and pecans to the chicken mixture. Then prebake the crust for 10 minutes.

SS11 has gone through several stages like that. He's in one now, actually. Our approach has been multipronged: - We remind him that he wants privileges (such as being allowed to go to the store alone) but that privileges come with showing maturity and responsibility. Lying doesn't show those things and makes it hard for us to believe he is ready for the things he would like to do or have. - We've had him write apology letters or write a list of 5 reasons that lying is wrong. None of the reasons can relate to getting caught or being punished. - We've explained to him that we greatly prefer to trust him. It's easier and happier for everyone if we don't have to police his every move. We've presented it like this: "A__, you don't like when we nag you and check on your every move, right? You like when we trust you and give you your own space. Well, when you lie to us about simple things, like brushing your teeth, it shows us that we NEED to be nagging you and checking on your every move. If we could trust that you'd brush your teeth when asked to, we wouldn't have to pester you about and it wouldn't turn into a fight. If there's no fight, then everybody is happier." Then he sees that our actions (nagging him) are a direct result of his actions (lying to us) and is more willing to change his actions. - We issue rewards for completed tasks. If he wants to watch a show that will be end a bit later than his usual bedtime, so we say "If you are ALL ready for bed BEFORE the show starts, then yes, you can stay up late to watch it. So that means you have to have your backpack ready for tomorrow, be showered with your teeth brushed, and in your pajamas. If ANY of those things aren't done by the time the show starts, then no show. Deal?" He knows that we mean it. If he skips something, he won't be watching and it will be his own fault. - This one is underhanded and a bit manipulative. We don't use it regularly. SS is always really worried about what other people think - he doesn't do well in social situations or make friends very easily, which is too bad because he's a nice boy and I've seen that he is a loyal friend. So we've reminded him that people don't like liars. We've said "People don't want to be friends with someone who lies to them. No one wants a friend they can't trust; they want a friend who will be truthful." For this case, we thought a little peer pressure might be a good thing, although it isn't a technique I'd usually advocate. - For personal hygiene issues, we've shown him pictures of gum disease and so on. He also doesn't like to brush his teeth or bathe. We explained that we don't tell him to do these tasks to spite him, but so that he is healthy and well. "Yup, brushing your teeth is a pain in the butt. But we don't make you do it to be mean to you or to think up clever ways to torment you. We make you brush your teeth because it's important for your health. ~Insert explanation of gum disease, complete with photos, here~. Now do you understand why it's important for you to brush your teeth?" We've had to do this roughly once a year since he was about 8. - And, of course, we try to praise and be positive for the things he does when asked and for telling the truth. To be honest, I get a bit frustrated with having to tell an 11yo that he did a good job because he put his dirty clothes in the laundry basket, or praise what a very good choice it was that he told us the truth about something... But he needs it, so I do it. I think it will continue to be an ongoing battle for us, for the same reason you just mentioned. SS doesn't really understand cause and effect or that actions cause reactions.

@salonva, so funny you posted this! I was in the Phila. area this past weekend seeing my DS and friends, and we went to the Brandywine Museum of Art. Highly recommend! Not just for the entertaining Shermund exhibit, but for their lovely Wyeth collection (my main reason for going). No, Christina's World is not there, but I loved it all the same. On top of those two, there was an intriguing and delightful exhibit of plant-based art. Combining natural materials with historical and contemporary photographic processes and inspired by a book of pressed flowers—known as an herbarium—created by renowned poet Emily Dickinson in the mid-nineteenth century, Marchand and Sobsey utilize pure pigments extracted from flowers to make a vibrant series of plant-based artworks. The resulting exhibition is a kaleidoscope of colors comprising over 50 works. And, speaking of plant-based, we had a fabulous, fabulous dinner at Ground Provisions in West Chester (three miles away from the museum). Frankly, I would give it three "fabulouses" except it's never good to overhype something, LOL. Ground Provisions is a prix fixe seven course vegan restaurant in a charming historic farmhouse. I am not vegan,.I am not even vegetarian. And in describing the meal to a friend the next day, I had to look it up to be sure I recalled correctly that it was vegan, as I described pasta in lemon butter and a strawberry shortcake with whipped cream. I suppose "butter" and "cream" should be in quotes then, but they certainly didn't taste like they were in quotes. It was not a bargain ( all in it was $250 for two) but IMHO totally worth it. My ideal meal out is something that I could not make at home (check), that makes me feel good eating it and is not too heavy or rich (check) and, of course, is delicious (check).