Wodka, I lost my husband in May - he died in his sleep. He wasnâÂÂt sick, but he wasnâÂÂt too healthy, either. It was a total shock and I still donâÂÂt quite believe it. I also have a big support system of people taking me to dinner and making sure that I'm busy. I haven't been working out as much as I used to, but all summer I was like a crazy woman in the garden doing all the heavy digging and lifting that my husband used to do for me (I've been re-arranging). I'm just a few years younger than you, and I thank God that my body is strong enough to do that work - there are many people our age that have physical problems. I've lost close to 10 pounds, mostly from my middle and I'll share the way I've been feeding myself - maybe it can help you. I buy chicken breasts or pork chops or small steaks when they're on special and I freeze them separately in zipper bags so it's easy to pull out just one piece and defrost it in a pot of hot water in the sink. I usually grill that meat (or fish or veggie burger) and also have a salad or sauteed spinach. I now rarely make rice or potatoes (something my husband insisted on having), so I'm eating just protein and vegetables, and there's fewer pots to clean up, too. When I don't pack my lunch I go to a local soup/salad bar, except for those very stressful days when I can't resist a ruben and French fries, but I try to keep that to a minimum. I'll get Chinese or other take out for dinner maybe once a week. And I still drink wine! But with winter coming and the long dark nights to get through, I'm looking for an affordable gym to go to after work to have a place to go and to keep moving. And I'm going to look into massage - what flyleft said makes sense. I'm sure toxins can build up from grief. Since my husband didn't take care of his health, I'm determined that I will. I also turned down the anti-depressants my doctor offered. I told her I cry every day, many times, but not all day. But like others have said, give yourself a break - this is a very big thing, especially after 40 years together. You will find your way.

Very thought-provoking podcast awm, thanks! I was wondering about interval training. Has anyone tried Body for Life's 12-week program? It sounds very efficient. Cardio Warm up the first 2 minutes at Intensity Level 5 Minutes 2-3 move from Intensity Level 5 to 6 Minutes 4-5, 6-10 and 11-14 work your way from Intensity Level 6 to Level 9, maintain for one minute. Minutes 15-19 work your way from Intensity Level 6 to Level 10 (High Point at Level 10), maintain for one minute. Minute 20 cool down to Intensity Level 5 for one minute. Alternate weight-training and cardio workouts for six consecutive days and rest on the seventh day. Weight Training * Weight train intensely, three times per week on alternating days with aerobic * Workout exercise three times per week. Make sure to hit your "high points" during your workout. * Alternate training the major muscles of the upper and lower body. * Perform two exercises for each major muscle group of the upper body. * Select one exercise and conduct five sets with it, starting with a set of 12 reps, then increasing the weight and doing 10 reps, adding more weight and doing 8 reps, adding more weight for 6 reps. Then reduce the weight and do 12 reps. Immediately perform another set of 12 reps for that muscle group using the second selected exercise. * For each muscle group, rest for one minute between the first four sets. Then complete the final two sets with no rest in between, wait two minutes before moving on to your next muscle group, complete this pattern five times for the upper body training experience and four times for the lower body training experience. -Lena

I took Paxil for a year and a half for depression. At first the it did indeed take the edge off the depression, for which I was thankful. *However,* during that timeframe I gained 40lbs !!!!! And I was not thin to begin with. So, my advice is -- consider switching to something like Welbutrin rather than taking an SSRI (Paxil, Lexapro, etc.) Cutting carbs and sugars is something we should all do, but I am the queen of carbs. It's a struggle, but one thing I want you to bear in mind is that in time, your hormones will stabilize and the terrible anxiety you are coping with will settle down. Anxiety can take control of your world if you let it. Don't let it. Get outside, take some walks, practice deep breathing. Here's what I did -- when I felt the panic kind of anxiety coming, I immediately took half of a 5mg Xanax pill -- and I told myself that between the medication and understanding what was happening, the panic attack would stop. And it almost always did. Things will get better!!

Thanks alisande. It actually feels like fluid retention because once it starts, I seem to blow up - don't laugh everyone because that's exactly what it looks like - LOL; like I could float away. I just had all levels checked and everything is fine. I do know I tend to carry a lot of fluid. I'm taking very small dose of meds for that but not regularly because it's way too much everyday. I end of losing too much magnesium (not Potassium, if you can believe that one). I've been using some supplements that have cut down on some of that. But nothing seems to help that tire area. Glad you mentioned this though. I feel so much better. Although I know that I have to watch the fluid retention and get regular bloodwork, at least it's something that I can deal with other than just gaining weight like crazy. BTW, I just talked to my siser who is really into holistic health, and she mentioned that since my A1c is only 6.4, I might want to try to reduce it further through nutrition. She knows people with much higher levels and on insulin, that have actually been taken off of meds. Diabetes is such an ugly disease - between it's damage and the meds. I put it up there with CA. I'm ready to try anything. Thanks so much for your suggestion!!