How long do you expect to remain in the house? If you have to sell, do you need to get most or all of that 55K back? (for example, to pay off the loan that financed the construction?)

Talk to a real estate agent to see if the updated homes in your area are selling for substantially higher prices. If not, you have to realize that this is money you are spending as a treat for yourself, not as an investment in the value of your home. I agree with Steff that financially this could be a high-risk move. While you are talking to that real estate agent, you should have him or her show you some homes that cost about 60K more than what your current home is worth. You may be able to move into a house with a better kitchen rather than remodel for one.

How many of the high-end items on your list--the copper sink, the glass tile, etc.--are "wants" versus "must haves"? No matter what budget you set, for any given kitchen remodel, you can't always get what you want.