My grandson went to Mexico with his church and helped build homes for some of the people there. He had a great time. He was about 14 then. I think the church paid, and we gave donations too, for him to go. He really enjoyed going and interacting with the little kids there. If I remember correctly, they stayed in a church at night, and then drove to the site each day.
Leslie

No, I wouldn't let her go because of her age and the cost. There will be other opportunities to go places and do things like this. If she is interested, she could start saving money now so she can go on a trip in the future when she is a few years older.

Yes, IF the oldest DD is going along.
The arguement is going to be "but Mommmm you let her go!"

I think it would depend on how stable the country is and how responsible the 23 year old is. If it were longer than 8 days, probably not, but I would take into consideration everything.

Oldest DD is actually my step daughter so "I" didn't have any say so in if she could go or not.:)

Grammahony-I agree about letting her see the conditions of other countries and how blessed we are here in America.

DH is not completely on board yet but I think it is her age and the empty nest feeling more than anything else driving his opinion.

I would be leary of letting my 23 year old be responsible for a 14 year old so very far away -- I would think that there are plenty of opportunities nearer to home /both in country & nearby Mexico - which would be less expensive & just as informative.
Passport considerations also - if you do let them go - be sure you & your dh have YOUR passports, just in case [heaven forbid - but my mom fell & broke her leg in Spain - had medical /travel insurance which got her home - but then was when I realized that my passport had long expired]

I agree that the key here is the older daughter. Will she be responsible enough to take good care of her younger sister? or is she the type who will take off to party? My dentist was just complaining last week that he took his daughter (she was in dental school at the time, so no young kid) with him to Nicaragua, expecting her to help out. He spends 2-4 weeks every year doing medical volunteer work in less fortunate countries. He said the daughter just took off and partied the whole time, he hardly saw her. And keep in mind, sometimes parents don't always KNOW how responsible their 20-something children are, because they tend to be a little different out of the house and in.

The price sounds VERY reasonable and shouldn't be that hard to raise, if everything else checks out. And it is a good thing for our children to see other areas, other life styles and to realize just how fortunate we are to be living here. And I'm a strong proponent for kids being encouraged to give back.

Now, if you end up still being unsure, what about making this a process? Maybe not letting her go this year, but setting her some tasks--volunteering in her community, helping fundraise, etc--and letting her work toward going NEXT year? Maybe that's the compromise that will make you all feel better about this?

Family oriented, spiritual and for only 8 days? I'd say yes. It'll be a wonderful learning experience. Make sure you meet with the grown-ups who are organizing the mission - just to make sure there's no Jim Jones type strangeness going on there.

Oh, and I agree with Cate, make sure your passport is in order, too, just in case.

Absolutely I'd let her go (assuming that you're comfortable that the adults going are mature and responsible). The lessons learned will never be forgotten. In this age of "it's all about me", she'll see that it's not.

Or you can keep her local... she can still see people living in poverty here.
Our church has been part of Appalachian Service Project for over 25 years. We sent over 2 dozen teens on a service trip last summer... it really is life changing for them.

That said...
DS (age 20 at the time) was supposed to go to Peru last March... the location was changed less than two months before because there was internal problems and foreigners were encourage to stay away. He ended up serving in Mexico, deep in the Sierra Madres. I was glad he was not so far away and not in a troubled country....

Here is a link that might be useful: Appalachian Service Project

A local church nearby takes high schoolers on mission trips to Peru every year, and the parents of the kids who have gone have great things to say about it.

If my 14-year-old daughter wanted to go, I'd do a lot of research about the trip before I'd say yes. How long has the church been going on this trip? Who organizes the trip - places to stay, eat, itinerary, etc., and how long have they been organizing it? Have they changed anything about the trip this year, why did they change it? How supervised will the kids be? Will they always be supervised by chaperones from the group or will they ever go off to be chaperoned by locals? How well do the organizers know the area? What are their plans in case of an emergency, such as what if my kid has appendicitis or is in an accident?

Who will the group chaperones be and how well do you know them? How many of the chaperones have been on this trip before and how old are they? Often church mission groups will have a chaperone who is a nurse, EMT, or has some type of medical training.

In my opinion, it doesn't matter if your 23-year-old daughter is very responsible if the organizers are not. Also, your 23-year-old might not fully think about the implications of your younger daughter having a life-threatening illness or injury in Peru, her idea of what is "safe" might not be yours.

Having been a chaperone on trips and having teenagers who have been chaperoned on trips without me, one thing I really like to see if my kids are doing something a little dangerous - if there is an emergency that causes some chaos, is there a chaperone there who has a personal tie to my kid and will make sure my kid is okay, who won't forget about him or her in the heat of the moment. Sounds like you will have that with your 23 year old daughter, so that is good.

So if the chaperones and organizers are experienced, the trip looks like it's well-run, and the fund-raising wouldn't be too onerous, I'd let my 14-year-old go if she was a responsible, mature girl and really wanted to go.

Our family experienced a life-threatening emergency on a trip one time. Another time when I was a chaperone, a young man had a potentially dangerous accident happen. I would only send my child to Peru with chaperones who really understood the enormity of the responsibility. If the organizers/chaperones didn't want to answer my questions, or didn't seem prepared, then absolutely my 14-year-old would not go. Your 14-year-old will have lots of opportunities when she is in college to go cool places and see great things, and also to serve others in difficult conditions.

I would not depend on my 23-year-old to answer my questions, either. I'd have to talk to the leaders of the trip.

I hope it works out well for your daughter.

I think it would be a great learning experience for your DD. I have a friend who is a missionary in Peru and has lived there for several years. He and his family came back to Texas for about 9 months a couple of years ago and his children couldn't wait to go back "home" to Peru. They love it over there and are doing such a great work for the people there.

youngest DS went to Mexico with a soccer team but that was 30 years ago.
No way would I let him go today with the violence and hatred for Americans down there. I read too many things about tourists being attacked

I have been going to 3rd world countries on mission trips for 9 years. There have been youths 14 and older that were not mature enough to be there and was more hindrence than help. I have seen 9 and 10 year olds that worked their little hands to the bones, very responsible mature kids. I would say it would depend on the maturity of the 14 year old.

Also, most of the time the team is divided into groups to serve in different areas, medical, dental, evangelistic, carpentry, kitchen, etc. Things are so hetic and busy it is most difficult for an adult to keep up with another adult much less on a sister. It would be very hard for the 23 year old to keep an eye on the 14 year old and should'nt have to; she should concentrate on what she is there to do.

Would I let her go? If she were mine and responsible,yes'mam in a heartbeat.

On every trip I have been on there are people assigned to be in charge of each function with other team members to work under them. The "team captain" would be the one to work with the 14 year old and shouldn't have to be a baby sitter. But would be thrilled to have a mature youth to help out.

and what about missionary work right here in the states? dd2 went to new mexico and help build a social center...she had a fantastic time...

now dd1 went to mexico, near cancun (no they didn't spend time on the beach) but! she was an adult, speaks fluent spanish and was there as a translator for the med team (she'd taken med spanish in college)at one point even she was a bit overwhelmed when the kids swarmed them when they were handing out toothbrushes!

Beside passports, she will need visas and noterized statements from both parents stating she can go and a certified copy of her birth certificate. Just going to Canada requires this unless BOTH parents go. New time new rules and regs.
I personally would not let my 14 year old go unless like Daisy said--those requirments are met. Many young girls are being kidnapped now and sold. Even my DH and I won't go to Mexico etc and we did camping there for many years.

No way would I let my 14 year old go, even if they were the most mature kid around. I think that is way too young. There are plenty of things she can do stateside. Our youth group goes to a homeless shelter a couple of hours from here and spends a weekend just helping out. I think that would be something better for a 14 year old. It's closer to home and all that stuff. Also, Peru has been in the news a lot the past couple of years and I don't think it is the most safe country especially for young people.

Let us know what you decide. Even if some of us are against it, we will still be supportive with whatever you decide.

DaisyInGA poses some excellent questions you and your husband will want to get answers to before making this decision.

I have provided a link to the current statement by our U. S. State Department on Peru.

As for me, I think the cost of the trip is very pricey -- 8 days for $2,700. How much will she learn, observe, get a feeling for, and 'help' in only 8 days ... at $337.50 per day.

"My older DD who is 23 is going to Peru in June for 8 days on a missionary trip. When she was here at Thanksgiving she told 14 yr old DD that she went to Mexico when she was her age for missions."

Well, 9 years ago was a long time ago and Mexico is not Peru. Political upheaval has increased dramatically throughout the world in those 9 years. There's a world of difference between being 23 and barely a teen at 14.

As for me personally, I think a first trip for a 14 year old would be confined to U.S. soil even after getting answers to all the questions that Daisy posed.

Here is a link that might be useful: Travel to Peru

I agree with others that say it would be a wonderful experience for her and to let her go after checking into details.

I would allow a 14 year old to go to Peru. I would be far less comfortable with Mexico. Distance has nothing to do with safety.

I'd like to know where that $2700 is going. I doubt if they're staying in a 4 star hotel.
And no, I wouldn't let her go. She wants to help people?
There are alot of Americans who need help.
That same $2700 would probably go a long way at your local senior center.

I don't know for sure about the cost, the $2700. But I suspect that is a decent price for a mission trip to Peru. The mission trips that our church sponsors for our teens include the cost of the mission supplies. For example, if they are going to repair homes or build a new church, the mission team members raise some of those funds as a part of going on the trip. If they are going to hold a vacation Bible school, part of the trip money goes toward purchasing crayons, paints, snacks for the kids, etc.

Also, a part of the trip money also sometimes goes to pay the plane fare, etc. for the youth group minister.

At our church, I think a great deal of the money is easily raised by the teens, just by asking other church members to help. When I donate money earmarked for a teen's mission trip, I know that I am in effect donating the building/repair supplies, VBS supplies, etc., and I am happy to do that.

I think the teens at our church probably have to come up with part of the cost themselves, but I don't think it's anywhere near the full amount. Arosegirl would probably know much better than me.

A mission trip is not comparable to a sight-seeing, tourist trip. Some of the costs are often much less - like lodging. The transportation costs can be a lot more (I think) because transportation to remote places is often more expensive than transportation to a popular tourist area. You can ask to see a breakdown of the budget to see where the money goes.

A friend of mine just spent some time in Peru and absolutely loved it. She traveled by herself alot and didn't feel unsafe at all. I would definitely let her go if I felt comfortable with the adults and the arrangements. It would be a life changing experience for her. I think alot of Americans are unneccesarily afraid to travel anywhere anymore. Of course there are plenty of places I wouldn't send her, but Peru would not be one of those.

Thank you all so much for all the opinions and questions you have brought up- I didn't even think about ME needing a passport just in case Duh me huh?

DH and I will discuss this and we HAVE to have a decision made by Jan 20 which ironically is DD's 14th birthday.

DD (23 yr old) is very responsible now and really has a heart for the mission field so there will not be any partying going on. She is a good mentor for 14 yr old DD so that is why I thought maybe they would be able to go on this trip together.
We'll see. Dh is not completely against it but has lots of questions as do I but he is protective of our "baby"(not that we can ever CALL her that!) LOL

Some of you had a question about the amount for the trip. The trips I have gone on it not only covers your airfare, transportion to and from the mission site,(gas,vehicle usually rented) driver, food and expense for the duration of the trip. The group I go with provides the bedding, huge containers of water, large ice chest with ice. Where we go is always primitive. No water, bathrooms like old outhouses, we sleep on the floor in sleeping bags on foam mats provided by the mission, sometimes on dirt floors but usually on concrete.

Some say help is needed in the USA but until you have seen the conditions in places such as Honduras you wouldn't question our going there. When people get sick they either get well on their own or die. They die because they don't have the 25 cents it takes to get a bus to a large city to a free hospital nor the transportation to get to a bus. The mode of transportion there is walking, some have horses, bicycles. I've seen some come on cows. We have people walking 3 to 4 days to get to us barefooted and hungry for medical treatment. We, in the US throw away more in a day than these people have in a lifetime.

If I won't bore you let me tell you more.

We always stay at the schools which are fenced in with one entrance and a guard. The number of buildings depend on the size of the village. Usually around 8. The buildings are of concrete blocks about 6 feet tall then wire from there to the ceiling, no fans. We designate the buildings for the medical clinic, dental clinic, a pharmacy, kitchen, men and women sleeping quarters. Supplies for all this is shipped months ahead. We send out construction crews, teams for bible study for the children and adults. They have to attend a church service before they can get any type treatment.

After your day has ended you are to tired to even think about partying if you could, where?? You bathe in a pvc pipe container wrapped with a tarp and a garden hose thrown over the top with water so cold it will freeze your buns off. You eat and fall into bed.

Oh, yes, let me mention that I am the team cook. I have to prepare 3 meals a day for up to 100 people using a butane stove with 4 burners, no oven, no electricity, no water except what we carry. The food is shipped from the states except the produce and some meat that is purchased by the base mission home. I prepare a regular USA breakfast, bacon, eggs,toast and one day pancakes. Lunch example: pork chops, greens, sweet potatoes, toast, chocolate pudding. Supper very similiar meal Ro-tel chicken with veggies, cakes that we bring from home for dessert. I feed my team well; they work so hard in such conditions. My groceries and supplies usually cost around $1,500 to $1,800.

Never in my travels in the USA have I seen poverty such as this. Sure there are the very poor but help is available. We are so fortunate here with welfare for the needy, free medical care, free food, free schools, etc. Cars and buses, trains are everywhere.

Emergencies: Always the team travels in school buses but a car and truck is there for that. One trip one member got sick (a condition she had when she came) was driven to a large city and airlifted to the states. I was hospilized in Honduras on my last trip with my legs; returned to the team and finished the week.

I have a soup ministry. I prepare enough soup to hand out around 2,000 cups of soup in the 4 to 5 days on the field. Sometimes this is the only nourishment they will get that day.

If anyone out there has any questions I would be delighted to try to answer them for you. Thanks for "listening". Can you tell I too have a heart for foreign missions? Charlene

Arosegirl wrote:

"Some say help is needed in the USA but until you have seen the conditions in places such as Honduras you wouldn't question our going there. When people get sick they either get well on their own or die. They die because they don't have the 25 cents it takes to get a bus to a large city to a free hospital nor the transportation to get to a bus. The mode of transportion there is walking, some have horses, bicycles. I've seen some come on cows. We have people walking 3 to 4 days to get to us barefooted and hungry for medical treatment.

"They have to attend a church service before they can get any type treatment."

********************

I never knew what those missions were really like before. You have shared how yours works ... very interesting.

I think it's a wonderful idea and a blessing to be able to help others BUT... maybe ok for the oldest but I'd wait on the younger DD. Fourteen is a bit young esp. if a 23 yr. old is in charge. You need to make sure the mission trip is well-equipped to handle things and that arrangements have been made by knowledgable people. You need to make sure she'll be safe. But I'm sure you know all this. Soooo many things can happen in a different country. I believe when she gets a bit older it might be good- also because community service/volunteer work is highly regarded on college applications and interviews. I would wait just a few more yrs. It won't hurt. And... if she says you let the other one go.... well, she is older and you're the mommy!