trailrunner - that's an awesome story. Mine is much less interesting, and much more recent, but I'll tell it anyway.

I started playing volleyball in the Boston area when I moved here 6 years ago. I had played volleyball previously, but really got into it here as a way to meet people, since I moved here on my own. I met lots of great people this way, but often found that they were much older than me, and mostly not potential dating material. Great to hang out with and play with, but not much more than that.

One day in August I signed up to play a doubles grass tournament. It was co-ed, "King of the Grass" style, which meant that you switched partners all day and met a bunch of people. Much to my surprise, there were four guys playing in the tournament too - all my age, all single. One in particular caught my eye - funny, smart, and just a nice guy. I tried all day to convey what I was trying to get across, but he was just not getting it. Finally, in talking to the group, I said, "I guess I'm going to go home and figure out what I'm going to do tonight. And if you ever want a partner to play, do you want my phone number." Of course, the wrong guy jumped at the chance first, and I had to maneuver over to my Matt, but he finally figured it out.

Later that night, he called me to go hang out with some of his friends at a pool bar. We chatted and hung out and had a generally great time. Later that week, I went over his house to watch "The Princess Bride", one of our all time favorite movies.

On Christmas Eve 2004, Matt proposed in my home town in a the bandshell of a park, all lit up with Christmas Trees. We were married on September 24, 2005, a short time ago. We're looking forward to spending the rest of our lives together and holding each others' hands through the journey.

Kristen

Funny-- my life as I know it now started back on Christmas Eve, too!! Only in 1997. That's when my ex and I finalized our divorce. At the time, I decided it would be a good idea to get her out of my face, and vice versa, so I took up an offer to travel around the country, working with a crew tiling malls and JC Pennys stores. I had just gotten into the internet, so I carried my DESKTOP in my truck wherever I went, which was neat, because I actually got to meet alot of the people I talked with!! One of the people I met on line was a woman who would eventually become my wife!! Ya know all those horror stories you've heard about starting relationships on line? More often than not, they're true, but if you keep your head about you and don't let your heart take over, it can actually work, and Kathleen and I are an example of that. We met in 98 on line, in real life for the first time in 99, and got married in 2001. This may will make 6 years. :-)

HS sweethearts here. We married Christmas break of his senior yr. in college. Due to statistics I consider myself very fortunate we just celebrated our 39th anniversary.

I would love to share my story, what a nice thing to ask. We were in our mid 20s when we met on a blind date over 30 years ago. I was working at the Univ. of Illinois and my DH was just finishing his Masters in EE Engineering there.

It turned out we had mutual friends, sort of. When I was going for my BA at Eastern Illinois Univ. I got to know a girl in the dorm who was dating a guy going to U of I. We kept in touch after I graduated. When she found out I was working at U of I, she told her husband. He told a past frat brother who happened to go to HS in Chicago with my DH and they had been friends. He knew my DH was going to U of I at the time and had planned on visiting him.

The old HS friend told my DH that he had heard that there was someone DH should meet and that we would really hit it off. Then my old friend called me and told me the same thing. Both my DH and I tried to get out of it repeatedly but they wouldn't let it go. I never did find out why they were so persistent.

We finally agreed to talk on the phone to get them off our backs. Well we talked for over 2 1/2 hours. Then we started going out almost every night. We had only 6 weeks to get to know each other. He had already accepted a job out in CA and I was under contract for at least 3 more months.

Anyway to make a long story short, we dated long distance with lots of letters and phone calls and him visiting once. On the 4th of July we decided to get married on Labor Day, the next time he could get time off and my contract would be up.

So on my own, with my own money I planned our wedding. I didn't have a lot of money so it was a very simple affair. My dress was hand sewed, we had the ceremony at a local church that neither one of us belonged to, but the only one we could find that would book at the last minute (my mom was adamant about a church, any church, wedding. We wanted to elope.). Her friend made the cake, and another friend played the music. Everyone brought their cameras and took pictures and sent us the prints and negatives later. We had the reception in the church's basement and food at my folks place later for close friends and relatives. My mom had picked up lunch meats, cheese and a relish tray at the local grocery store. Then we caught a late flight to CA because he had to be at work the next day.

Of course everyone was whispering about what a rushed job it was and speculating about the reason. I afraid they were disappointed when it turned out to be 7 years before we had a child. The longest pregnancy on record!

Sometimes I am amazed that we went through with the whole thing. We barely had any time to get to know each other. And also sometimes surprised that we have stayed together after so many hurdles we have had to face in the last 30 years. I guess my mom was right, you just know when the right one comes along.
Clare

What great stories. So many different ways to begin a life together and yet there is the common thread of talking and sharing thoughts and ideas with each other.

kisaacs: your story certainly is wonderful too! I firmly believe if couples talked and shared ideas and, as Bill says ,used their heads AND their hearts the relationships would last and last and grow and evolve and they would want to stay together because they always have that common ground of communication.

I hope others will share their thoughts and stories. I learned so much from the dghts/wedding thread, as I have an unmarried dght. I think we can all learn a lot from each others' experiences...whether it is kitchen remodels or life remodels ! Caroline

We met at my friend's family place on a lake in Maine (DH and my friend are cousins). I noticed him first (just my type - 6'3", 230, good looking in a rough Irish way), but he was so aggravated with his sister for chatting with us and keeping him waiting (he was waiting to take her water skiing) that he never noticed me. Later in the day he noticed me standing on the deck of the house (he was on the lake in the boat) and asked my friend's brother who I was. We saw each other several times that weekend, but he didn't really talk to me. There was a cast of thousands and he tends to be a watcher in those situations. I'm more a talk to anyone sort. He has one of those families (with about 40 cousins) where if someone knew he liked me they would tease him about it for 5 years, preferably in front of as many people as possible. When I was leaving he made a point of showing up at my friend's place. We talked for 2 hours in my car in the rain (with several family members whispering and gossiping as they speculated about what was going on). He took my number (after much pathetic hinting) and said he'd call.

He did - 5 months later. Can you imagine waiting 5 months to call someone, if you were going to call them at all? Seven years later we got married (see a theme here?). Now three plus years after that I'm trying to talk him into kids (well, not really talk him into it. More like reminding him of our prior agreement and the situation of my rapidly expiring eggs). So there we are, 10 years later!

The thing that is funny, is that we were right under each other's noses. We went to many of the same events for over 20 years before we met. Most of his family already knew me, including all his sibling and his parents. There are photos with both of us in them, but we didn't know each other. Timing is everything.

I love this thread! I especially love Trailrunner's elopement story since I spent the last year planning weddings for my son and daughter! My son got married in December and my daughter is getting married this summer. It's a very exciting and expensive time.

I went away to college at SUNY Albany when I was 16 years old. I used to sit at dinner on our quad with my friends for hours and watch the fraternity boys file in for dinner. We picked out all the cute boys and gave them nicknames. There was one boy I thought was especially cute, and I talked about him all the time! My roommate was dating a boy she knew from home, and he happened to be in the same fraternity. My roommate thought it would be a great idea to set me up. I was so nervous because I was 2 years younger than all the other freshmen, and this boy was a SOPHOMORE.
He asked them to point me out, and when I passed inspection, he called to ask me out. An hour before our date he called me back to remind me to bring proof of age to get into a club. I told him I wasn't 18 yet (18 was the drinking age back then). He asked me how many months until my 18th birthday. I told him...2 years!

His fraternity had a wild reputation, and girls in my dorm didn't think I should go on a date with a boy I didn't know. A bunch of girls waited up for me that night to make sure I was OK. He was a perfect gentleman- smart and sweet.

His fraternity always referred to me as his "13 year old girlfriend". We got pinned when I was 17, engaged when I was 18, and got married when he graduated and I was 19! We've been married for 37 years! Some years have been longer than others, but for the most part the time has flown by, and we are good friends who share a history- our history!

arteacher-- Have you ever thought about getting in touch with the producers from Grays Anatomy for stealing yout concept? (McDreamy, McSteamy, etc.) :-)

I used to work on-camera in television and my DH saw me there and schemed to meet me. Finally, he got someone else to call me up and propose that I have the use of a product they made for a story I was doing. And my DH came with the product to make sure I knew how to run it...... :)

Molly~

Okay, I would NEVER advise anyone to do this, but, we met in Vegas (both of us from different states) and were married 2 months later-that was 14 years ago, and I'm still crazy about him!

We met at a college party the first Friday night of my freshman year. It was DH's second year of college but he had just transferred to this school so his first Friday night there too. And to set the stage let me just add that the legal drinking age at that time was 18.

I did a double take as soon as I saw him walk into the party with what turned out to be his two roommates. I was there with my roommate and we chatted about these three cute guys. Well I kept looking for him/at him and pretty soon we had the eye game going. After having my confidence bolstered by a modest amount of alcohol I approached him. I remember him asking me where I was going and I said to get a beer - and I distinctly remember I was going in the opposite direction of the libations and thought that was a rather lame excuse for why I was making my way over in his direction.

In any case, I guess it must have been love at first sight as they say. We have been together since that first night we met and we will be married 29 years this summer. It's kind of weird - we still talk about how neither one of us ever dated anyone very seriously in high school - just never found anyone we really liked. Then - whammo - one Friday night and it's all over. He also claims he was a bit reserved about girls and that if I hadn't "picked him up" none of this may have come to pass.

I worked in the financial services dpt of my nursing school. I was helping students sign over student loans at the college reg. day ( not just a nursing school..) I looked up at this BEAUTIFUL blond man in my line and said..your in the wrong line this is for nursing students. He fired back something about sex discrimination in is usually sweet but correcting nature (he was in the correct line and is now a nurse as well). I had a boyfriend at the time so I thought my dear friend sitting next to me was insane when she said "I do believe there is a story yet to be told here." We were married 1 1/2 years later and will celebrate our 10 th anniversary in June. He continues to amaze me. I am the luckiest woman.

We were both in law school at the time- he a year ahead of me. First-year students are fairly segregated from the general populace, but I had seen him a couple of times and thought he was the best-looking guy I'd ever seen. A year later, both engaged to other people, we were introduced by mutual friends. That was it.

We were engaged and married so fast he didn't know I was younger than he was until we applied for our marriage license. My college graduation year was the same as his, as I'd graduated early. He assumed I was the same age.

We were married by a renegade priest my parents had (probably) bribed into doing the ceremony. We met him the day of the wedding. Dad shook his hand, and reintroduced himself- Hi, I'm Bill. Offered the priest a drink, which he declined. Oldest brother introduced himself- Hi, I'm Bill. Future FIL introduced himself- Hi, I'm Bill, pleased to meet you. Oldest future BIL introduced himself- I'm Bill. My godfather shook the priest's hand- I'm Bill. Mother's BILs were all there- all 4 of them. I'm Bill, I'm Bill, I'm Bill, I'm Bill. The priest looked a little helpless at that point and cleared his throat and asked about the best man. That would be DH's best buddy, Bill. Then he asked about my maid of Honor. My oldest brother stepped forward and said, "That's me." The priest said to my dad, "I believe I'll take that drink."

Cheers to 27+ years!

I was crying over a guy that I had dated/known for over 2 years but he had graduated and left the state without taking any initiative about "Us" (dumped?)
I was introduced to a "Sorority sister's brother's best friend" (Ted) I was still depressed but Ted said, "Any guy who takes that long to make up his mind about a pretty girl like you must have a problem with love"
Well, Ted didn't have a problem with love. He boosted my ego, didn't dwell on my shortcomimgs, and showed me that love is beatiful and shouldn't be witheld. He wasn't afraid of commitment or intimacy and we were married 6 months later.

This has been the best thread. It has been great to read others experiences in "finding " the right person. I am so glad you all wanted to share your stories. Might be worth printing out for our married/unmarried kids . Also the dght/wedding thread . I haven't read the "how long did it take to leave your ex" thread yet but maybe print it too and make them all required reading for our kids. Caroline

Wow. These are fabulous stories!!! I wish I had a fabulous story, but mine is very mundane. Well, there is one interesting touch, I guess, so I'll tell it.

DH and I taught at the same place. I was aware of him but our paths didn't cross very often and we were both in relationships with others. Then one year we both broke it off with our SOs at about the same time. On the last day of the semester/school year he asked if I'd like to go out. I said yes. Sparks flew. I'd been unmarried for 15 years with no plans to *ever* remarry. DH was 40 and had never married at all. I knew we were destined to be together. Unfortunately, dh was scared to death of commitment and told me he thought we should stop seeing each other. I wasn't really worried because I knew he was mine, but knew I'd have to wait for him to figure it out. To speed things up I started giving him bits of my writing--poems, thoughts, letters, which I left in his mailbox at work. Then I stopped. I told him that while I enjoyed sharing my writing with him, I didn't want it to be a burden or an unwanted connection. He dropped the whole fear of commitment after that.

Not long after, his mother died very tragically. He leaned on me very heavily at that time and her death really opened his eyes to appreciating life and sharing it with others. We began to talk about getting married. Then about a year later we discovered, much to our surprise, that we were expecting a baby--something we had not considered a possibility since I was nearly 44 and had been using BC. What a joy! That was November. We made plans to marry in Hawaii during Christmas break. We did not want a regular wedding and so I found a guy and his wife who performed marriage ceremonies. They wrote the vows, found a perfect secluded beach, and the wife took our pictures while her dh performed the ceremony, including the reading of a Hawaiian poem that brought tears to his eyes. DH and I were gripping each other's hands so tightly it hurt because we were trying very hard not to laugh, even though it was a sweet gesture. We were the only ones on the whole beach. We had a great brunch overlooking the sea and had our bathing suits on under our wedding clothes :) We just celebrated our 7th anniversary and there is simply no doubt about our bonds with one another. Our little girl was born the following June and we added twin sisters to the mix 3 years later.

My DH and I met in high school Spanish class. He was a senior and I was a freshman. He wasn't interested in me and I wasn't interested in him, but we always talked. He was a nice guy. The next year, I started dating who I thought was the love of my life. That lasted three years.

Fast forward 4 years; Neither of us in a relationship. I never dated to just be dating. The girl I was living with and I met a couple of other girl friends at a bar not far from our apartments. We never went to bars, really...but twice we went to this one and both times DH was there. We always said hello and talked a few minutes, but this time he asked for my number. We started talking to everyone and I forgot to give it to him.

The next day at work, I'm kicking myself - HARD! That night, I did something I never did; I picked up the phone and called him. He was so glad I had and said he had been wondering all day long how he was going to get my number. We talked about 30 minutes and he went to work out. An hour later, he called and said 'Let's go grab something to eat.' The next day, I called my best friend from high school and said "you will never guess who I went out with last night!" We've been together ever since.

Our first date was on June 8th. He met my parents towards the end of June since they were moving to PA for 11 mths while Dad attended the Army War College at Carlisle Barracks.

I waited on him to tell me he loved me first. I didn't want to scare him away. That took four weeks. ;) Then, I went to Ft Drum, NY for a week in July, I was in the Army Reserve. He picked me up at the airport and told me he never wanted to be without me again. I think that's how we got engaged. We joke that we really don't know how, since he never offically asked me. We called my parents. Mom said "well, we won't be home until next June" and we said "you're coming home for Christmas, aren't you?" We were married the 26th of Dec and just celebrated our 25th anniversary.

My minister was going out of town and could not perform the ceremony. My future in-laws lived next door to a minister who was a mechanic during the week. We tell the kids Mr Goodwrench married us and joke about it maybe not being legal. ;)

He is the best thing that ever happened to me and I'm lucky to have him.

I met DH in a bar, where I was not supposed to be. My Irish Victorian mother told me to tell my aunts that I met him at the supermarket. 38 years and still having fun!

Funny you should say that about your mom and aunts-- I had this little pint sized great aunt who was born and raised in Catania, Sicily, and the first words out of her mouth the first time around was "Is she Italian?" Nope. "Well, then she's Catholic!" Nope. "She's TROUBLE!!" I don't want to even think about if she'd ever gotten the chance to meet my present wife and found out she's Morman!!

I am an engineer in Chicagoland that installs and programs telephone systems. I was sent to MI to install the phone system for Oakland Community College. (for anyone familiar) John was the assigned Michigan Engineer. It is a very large community college. The biggest I have ever seen. John had a reputation of working especially hard and he is a real quiet guy. One day we had to work together staging all the equipment and the elevator only went up to the 2nd floor. We had to get to the 3rd floor. We took everything off the cart and he gave me this look like I was just a girl and he was going to have to carry the thing by himself. I grabbed my side and looked him right in the eye and said "are you ready?" The next day he told the people in the MI office that "that chick from Chicago works her ass off." lol

About a month later and after I had been there 3 months we had already completed the cutover and I was scheduled to go back to IL a week later. He tells me in a bar with all the other guys on the project (liquid courage) that he really likes me etc etc. I was speechless, I mean I am leaving in a week and now he tells me.

Well about 3 weeks after I got back to IL, I had to go back and take care of some things and we worked together again. We have been together ever since. He told me that if he still felt like throwing up after 6 months he was going to put in for a transfer to Chicago. He did. :) We have been married for 5.5 years and have 3yo identical twin girls.

We still work for the same company.

These are some great stories. I'd like to share mine, since I think that it's pretty interesting.

I met my husband over the phone.

I was working at a new job after being unemployed for 8 months. I worked in the order dept for a very respected publishing company, taking phone orders. Since I was so elated to be working again I tended to be extremely pleasant and helpful in those early days so when I received a call from StonyBrook University's bookstore inquiring about one of their orders instead of transferring the call to customer service ( as we were supposed to do) I checked the status of the order myself & told the guy on the other end of the phone that it had shipped out about a week ago. Since Stony Brook Univ is about an hour away from our distribution center I was a bit baffled as to why they hadn't received the books yet. He asked how the books had been shipped and I replied "by armadillo?". He howled with laughter.

We spoke again a few more times in the course of the regular order pool, then he started asking for me exclusiveley and after hours of conversations at work (it's a wonder that my co-workers never ratted me out) we started calling each other at home.

Now, these marathon phone calls took place over the course of a year. The subject of appearance never came up, nor did the fact that both of us were currently involved in long term relationships (I was dating the world's biggest loser- gorgeous as anything but the "honey can you bail me out of jail 'cause I've got two simultaneous warrants for my arrest in two different counties" kind of loser.)

So after a year and countless hours on the phone I was going out to Stony Brook to visit a dear friend and my phone pal, Bill, suggested that we meet for a drink. I offered to stop by the bookstore to find him. I had a vision of being able to spot him immediately in spite of having no idea what he looked like. I was crazy about this guy already and was convinced that I would just "know.

Well. For starters once I arrived on campus I couldn't find the bookstore. Nor could I find anyone that could tell me where the bookstore was. Panicked that the store would close before I could get there, I found a payphone & called. I told Bill where I was, he told me to sit tight & he'd come find me.

You need to picture this. It was 1992. I'm sporting an impressive black mohawk, multiply piereced ears, skull buckle boots, head to toe black. In strolls the early 90's equivalent of James Hetfield from Metallica, complete with long hair & impressive fu manchu moustache. SO not my mental image of my phone pal and so, so not my "type". I was devastated.

You have to understand that at the time I was very, very superficial & most likely would never even have spoken to my now husband, much less dated him. Still, the evening went well once I got past his looks (I was such an idiot) and I figured that I wouldn't hold that against him (a pompous idiot). We went onward to my friend's house...who had just taken a home pregnancy test & greeted us waving the urine dipped stick. It was positive & she was delighted. Bill never batted an eye at the antics of my delirious friend, just took it all in stride.

So I called him about a week later at home. I figured that there was no reason he & I couldn't continue our friendship even though he wasn't my type. He was very odd on the phone, very distracted & almost disinterested and it ocurred to me...much to my horror...that maybe he had a problem with MY appearance! How dare he! I was livid. I found out later that he was so distant over the phone because his GF of a bout 2 years was there, wanting to know who he was talking to, who I was, etc.

A couple of months later he calls me at work & we pick up as if we'd never stopped. The marathon phone calls resumed & when I'd go out to visit my now very pregnant friend, he'd stop by her place as well. Still friends, still chatting, nothing else. By this time we had both shed our respective (in)significant others, though. We had our first real "date" in July...a friend's wedding in Buffalo where Bill told me that he never wanted to get married & I said I had no intentions of doing so either... & he asked me to marry him on Christmas eve. We'll have been married 13 years this March and I thank God every day for how lucky I am.

The funny thing is that I come from a very, very old country Italian family. My father died when I was very young but my mother is very traditional & old fashioned. She is anti long hair on men, anti tattoo and definitely anti motorcycle but thinks that the sun rises & sets on my husband. After years of her absolutely forbidding me to learn to ride a motorcycle she was delighted when I got my license after Bill & I got married & thinks that it's wonderful how the two of us share that. I'm convinced that after the parade of freaks I brought through her house she was so ecstatic to see me end up marrying someone that was intelligent and respectful she didn't care how long his hair was. But she adores him as he does her and I'm very fortunate for that as well :-).

Nina

Nina, that is a great story. You made me laugh when you thought he might be upset by YOUR looks...LOL. Who me ??

These are so much fun to read and I am so glad you all have wanted to share your stories. Caroline