Please give some advice to new grandparents!

23 years ago

Hello everyone, we have 2 grandsons, born a month apart, one lives out of state, the other a few hours away. We are trying to be equal in money, gifts, attention. They are just a year old, could any of you with years of experience tell us what you have learned that you wish you knew from the very beginning? Thank you! LynnZee

Sort by:Oldest

Comments (5)

lulie___wayne
23 years ago
Hey LynnZee, I don't have years of experience, but I think what DH and I do for our grandbabies would be good advice to you.Our grandsons are just 2 and 3. As far as gifts go, we give them moderate gifts on holidays and birthdays etc. We don't by any means overload them. After we have bought a moderate gift, we put money in an account we opened for them. We believe that it will be much more appreciated and well-spent this way. Usually kids today are overloaded with toys etc. anyway and I really don't want to spoil mine thinking that they are going to be showered with gifts for every occasion. When they get older, I feel that they will appreciate the little nest egg.
As far as dividing attention, being that you don't live in the same community with either of them, I would just do my best to have family gatherings which include both families and try my best to visit when I can. That is really all you can do.
Good luck and congratulations!! It is wonderful being a grandparent, as I am sure you know by now!!
Lulie Cosby
jenn
23 years ago
Lulie, great ideas. What do you consider a "moderate gift"? Just last night my husband said he's trying to think of something to give that's not "fleeting"... in other words, something that he will enjoy and appreciate and won't just be one of dozens of similar toys he'll soon be disinterested in.
Related Discussions
Please give me some advice
Q
Comments (9)
Well... :-)! To pot or not to pot!!! Anyway, maybe I will wait another month, firstly because I don't have the time right now and secondly, I don't have the "right" mix right now. Over here where I am, I don't have any pre-mix orchid potting medium, no fir bark, perlite or the like. People around me use what they call "tree fern", very dry and porous, mixed with decomposed goat manure + little bit of lime to pot their cymbidiums. I have been using the same thing minus lime... for my other cymbidiums. So, I think I'm going to use the same mix for these bulbs, maybe I will try to tear the tree-fern into smaller bits. I also have some sphagnum moss and some pine bark that I can use too. What is your advice here? Many thanks. Xuan (from Vietnam)
...See More
please give me some advice...
Q
Comments (3)
The only problem with tree peonies in full sun is that the flowers will crisp off in a few days in spring. The rest of the year they will love it, at least once they establish some good roots. Droopy and sulking is normal for a transplanted tree peony. Opening an umbrella is a fine idea! Watering every morning is not a fine idea. Looking back at your previous post, I see you didn't get confirmation to plant them "submerged" but I hope you did anyway. If you did then the roots are mostly down a foot or so in the soil. To give them any water needs a long slow soaking and should only be done once a week or less. You can do this with a soaker hose overnight, or something similar. You might want to dig a test hold after you have watered the area (or even before!) and see if the soil is wet or dry down at the depth of the bottom of the rootball. You will have to baby them through the first summer. By next year, they should have a much better root system and be able to cope on their own. Established tree peonies are extremely drought tolerant.
...See More
Can You Give Me Some Advice On Buying A New Digital Camera?
Q
Comments (7)
One of the best digital camera sites around is dpreview.com. You can spend forever reading their reviews and forums. The canons are indeed highly regarded, but there are also many nikon and sony fans as well. Personally I'm a canon guy, but I wouldn't go so far as to say that they're hands-down the best in all areas. There are digital cameras available in all price and quality ranges. It really depends on what you want to spend. I love the elphs like lowspark has, but you do pay extra for the small form factor. Canon has a range that's cheaper but larger, with similar quality in terms of lens and imaging. You should generally plan on buying a separate memory card as the ones that come with the camera are pretty lame. Figure on getting a 512MB or 1GB card. The higher the resolution of the camera the better, in general, however there are some technical issues as resolution gets above 5 megapixel. So a camera with 7 megapixel isn't necessarily always better than a 5 megapixel camera. I'd generally look for a camera with 5 megapixel or higher, and a 3x or better lens in the range of 35-135 or thereabouts. Image stabilization is very nice to have; canon has optical IS, which is generally considered better than electronic IS. Also important is speed in several areas. How long does the camera take to turn on? How quickly does it take the image once you push the shutter button? How quickly can you take multiple photos in sequence? How quickly does it focus? Those are things you can get a feel for by playing with the cameras in a local store. In general, you can't go wrong with canon, sony, or nikon.
...See More
Can anyone give me some advice about a grace quilt frame please.
Q
Comments (5)
Heehee, I took over the dining room for my quilting frame! We never used the dining room, anyway. I have an original Hinterberg frame. The ends are wood and the rails are 10' pieces of steel conduit. It can be moved intact, though it's a challenge moving something 10' long! It comes apart pretty easily - we moved it assembled into the garage for Christmas and after Christmas I took it apart and moved it one piece at a time back into the dining room and put it back together in about an hour. I have a 9" long Juki machine on the frame, and you can't quilt very much in one pass with it, though I don't quilt enough or sell my quilts in order to justify a bigger machine. You just learn to work with what you have! But I would say if your machine is any smaller than 9" you will be really frustrated trying to use it on a frame. There's a Yahoo group called Home Quilting Systems. The members of the group have all kinds of frame setups, so you should be able to get some information on the Grace frames. There's probably a Grace Yahoo group, too. Donna
...See More
mariend
23 years ago
Even though they are only one, you might look for books, etc. Soft books, that they can and will chew etc. Also I use to look for "educational" toys etc. Places like Toy 4 US group items by age. Don't be afraid to dicuss this with the parents. You probably will never be "even" with gifts, and this should not be a problem. Learn their personalities, and give a few gifts etc. You could develop a hobby also. Picnics, walks in the park, etc. Do you have a viedo camera? Start a Grandma book with things you like and maybe they will like later--poems, songs, pictures etc. Even a little about when their parents were little. Reading to them will help. Your husband could have a special book, a special tool, a bird house, etc. I am sure just looking around the stores you will get ideas.
Congraulations and good luck
Marie
ponderinstuff
23 years ago
I have wonderful memories of my Grandmother. Unfortunately, I came along fairly late in life and didn't know the others. You know what I remember? The time she spent with me. I use to spend the night with her and we'd play cards for hours. she didn't have much money and lived with her friend in the upstairs of her home. It was a small upstairs and just right for the two of us. I'm getting warm all over just remembering :-)

I have a son that hasn't had the benefits of good Grandparenting and I feel bad for him. His step Grandma is so busy volunteering and doing good stuff for others that all the Grandkids seem unimportant. Her and my Dad have never even had him spend the night and he's 18 now. Too old to care. My husbands side was even worse. From the day he was born they made it clear they were never going to babysit and they didn't. They never built a relationship either.

I don't know if your retired or still working, but how special it would be to make time for them during summer vacation or other holidays and spend special time with you. I know when our son was little the pool at the hotel was the greatest entertainment, and it didn't have to be fancy. A walk, an ice cream, etc all willl make memories for that child to hold for the rest of their lives, and it will make them both feel real special. Perhaps you could even be a catalist for the relationship between the grandkids if they don't get to see each other much.

I don't have years of wisdom to pass on, just some stuff I appreciated and treasure and regret in the life of my son and his cousins.

How wonderful that you cared enough to ask on this forum. I bet your going to be wonderful Grandparents!
nancyl_ont
23 years ago
LynZee, welcome to the GP club. You are going to experience something unique and quite wonderful. My GDs are undoubtedly the joy of my life.
All of the advice above is excellent and wise. I would just like to add re showing favouritism. My daughter was concerned that I would show preference for the first born granddaughter (one of three) but what I do is refer to each one as "my favourite seven year-old, my favourite five year-old and my favourite three year-old" so when I greet them each one knows that she is special to me in her own way
Also really LISTEN to them, that is give them your full attention when they are trying to tell you something. One last thing, my GDs love to hear stories from my life, experiences I have had, fun or sad things. They always say "Tell us that story again, Gran" Even when I`ve just finished it! We talk a lot. I could go on and on. Good luck!

Please give some advice to new grandparents!

Comments (5)

lulie___wayne

jenn

Related Discussions

mariend

ponderinstuff

nancyl_ont

COMPANY

BUSINESS SERVICES

GET HELP

CONNECT WITH US