Be assured it is not just you!! DH and I have been through the same "roller-coaster ride" thinking we knew EXACTLY what we wanted only to second guess ourselves and change our minds completely to something else!

Looking at your last pic I see the transition ( a couple of steps?) and you could go with hardwood in the great room and then tile in the kitchen/dining.
I also think it would look nice with all hardwood, but not all tile. I have a real love for hardwood and we have it all through our house except for bathrooms, laundry, and 2 spare bedrooms. If you want more input try posting over in the home decorating forum; they are really good at visualizing and some may do the photo shop for you to see what each flooring would look like.
HTH

It's all the decisions. Literally thousands of them.

We built what was to be our "forever" house in 2001, and I swore I'd never do it again. However, I lied, and we're nearing the end (good gosh, I hope) of an extremely difficult and drawn-out build, with a boatload of problems no one could have predicted or even imagined in their wildest nightmare. I think I've taken it a bit more in stride, having had a practice houuse, but still, nearly every decision has been hard. This week is my absolute deadline for paint choices and I've been agonizing over them for months! I just placed the final order for appliances -- same thing! Every time I made a decision, someone would post that "the [whatever I'd just chosen] is a piece of junk!" and I'd be back to the drawing board.

I made some mistakes in the first house, but they weren't life or death -- although I'll admit, when making decisions, every one seems to be. I'll probably make some in this house, too, and we'll either fix them or live with them . . . either way, it's the people who live here and who visit that will make this house a happy and joy-filled one -- not the paint color.

Hangeth thou in there . . . it will be okay!

Arlene

Tell me about it! Do you know how many hours I've spent looking at lighting fixtures...and they're not even one of the items I care most about and are easily changeable.

I'm within a week or so of my close-in inspection and I'm absolutely paranoid that I forgot to wire something somewhere. Weeks ago I decided against central vac, now I'm reconsidering! Aaak!

For your other question, I love hardwood and am doing it everywhere but baths and mud room...so you know my answer to your question.

I was in the same position as you are, then I got help from a designer. He helped me with colors, hardware, flooring, etc. He knew just what I wanted and was able to put everything together. I don't know what I would have done without him. He did cost me money, but probably saved me money in the long run and alot fewer headaches.

trudymom... Would you mind me asking what that KD ended up costing you ? Could be the way to go

sw

I think its a combination. Decisions, misunderstandings, expectations, finances, emotions, etc. Very VERY overwhelming. I felt like I was at my breaking point this week. This is our first build and I can say for sure that there is no way I want to do this again anytime soon. It sounds dreamy in the beginning.... but once it begins, it slowly drains you. I just hope that after we survive the process we're happy with the finished project and say "It was all worth it". Until then, I'll continue to freak out :)

sweetwillie, I paid my designer $75.00/hour and I probably used him about 25 hours. He charged for coming out to my house, which is about an hour from his, so I only had him come out twice--I would usually go to his office with my samples. I always had my questions organized so they would take the least amount of time. He also charged for emails, so I tried to limit those. I showed him pictures of kitchens, etc. that I liked alot and told him what I liked about that picture, whether it was the paint, stain, granite, etc. He used to teach art at a university and also used to paint, so he did know his colors well. He did go to the granite yard with me and chose the granite I had been second-guessing without even my saying that was the one I was thinking about.

Maybe go to open houses and see what colors you like there and maybe there was a designer who did the house. I got my designer from my GC.

I like the brick alot that you used on your home.

sweetwillie, also if you choose the designer route, go see other things that the person has done. I interviewed 3 people before I chose the one I ended up with. Maybe even talk to the people whose houses he has done, asking them how he was to work with, etc.

Thanks Trudymom,

I think we need to explore this option.

I design new and renovated houses for people. I find that the biggest surprise to most homeowners is how much detail and coordination is involved in the design of a house. At the beginning they think these issues are things they are already very familiar with and that they know what they like and dislike. The reality is that most people have simply adjusted to apartments and houses designed by others for others and have spent little time thinking in detail about what they would want if they could control the entire design or how these elements should fit together.

In the initial interview people tell me what they want and even offer diagrams and photos but it is just a way to get to know each other. I can tell as much from their existing house as from their wish list and I've never had an owner's diagram survive the first 10 minutes of a serious design discussion.

People ask for large windows that look at the back yard but have their existing rear windows completely covered with curtains for privacy. They might say they want to use space efficiently with open spaces elsewhere but that can cause the spaces to be poorly formed and awkward. One owner hated stairs because she wanted to visually connect all spaces but the spectacular view was from a higher level, so I divided the floor plan into quadrants that stepped upward making the entire house into a stair with a balcony overlook at the top. A psychiatrist couldn't decide if he wanted to have his office on the lower floor or the upper overlook space so I put an open stair between them so he could use either depending on the patient. I tried to convince a widower that he should design the master bedroom for a future wife but he said he would never remarry and then he introduced me to his fiance when I was inspecting the trim work. Homeowners usually wait a month for a building permit in a tough town nearby but I submitted a complete set of drawings with zoning and code analysis sheets with professional stamps and got the permit in 2 days.

In short, building a house is hard because few people have had an opportunity to developed the necessary skills and expertise and are not willing to find room in their budget to pay for those who do. Few want to build less house in order to build it better. The fearlessness of this DIY approach puzzles me. Few would try to rebuild the transmission in a $30,000 car but would be willing to layout and detail a half million dollar house with help from trade and sales people or internet chat rooms.

It is stressful because of the decisions, the time spent, and the money. For me it seems to be mostly the decisions. In the past week my builder needed final answers on tile, paint, and stain/trim colors. I knew it was coming, had plenty of advance notice, but it still hit me hard. I have been running all over town everyday. I have bought a total of 18 paint sample quarts from Sherwin Williams. I've been to the tile store who knows how many times, and I'm still looking at tile online. Like you, I second guess most of my decisions. It's the worry of moving in and not being thrilled with everything. I feel like after all the time I've invested- and of course the money- that I have to get it perfect. So that is a lot of pressure to put on oneself!

I'm not sure what all the reasons are, but I am feeling the stress. We are in the trim stages of our house (this is our third build) and this one has been the worst. Part of it is our builder; part of it is my age (don't ask--but I did hit the half century mark last year), part is the length of time it takes to build (I don't do big projects well), and then there are all the decisions AND the consequences of the decisions. And, no matter how hard you try, you are almost always over budget. Just yesterday my trim carpender showed my master closet (DH has his own), and I almost fainted. It was much too small and I just hadn't anticipated how much space would be taken after the trim was in. So, now we are considering knocking out the outside wall (walk out basement, so it will have to be an overhang over the basement) to make the closet bigger. We are down sizing about 400 sq. ft. and already the laundry, pantry and mudroom feel too small. I think my DH knew that the closet was the last straw (he is the one really wanting to downsize). I actually think I have had chest pains this week (surely just stress).
We haven't taken a day off since Christmas--always doing something on one of the houses (oh, did I mention--our other house is one the market as well). So, there ya have it--didn't mean to dump on you guys--but since you brought it up--thought I would add my two cents. And stress is cumulative--so, it's time to get some relief and be finished with this build!!
And, I would hire someone to help. Doesn't always have to be someone who is trained professionally. I have a "real" designer, (95.00 an hour) and a decorater (35.00 and hour).
I only use the designer when I want help with cabinet design etc. My other girl can help with color choices and floor cordination etc. Just a thought.

Building isn't stressful at all. Remember; it's ONLY a house; nothing more. It isn't the holy grail.

I agree with Jason. We found most of the decisions fun to make. Our only complaints are money (I am a newer teacher making 40K) and my wife complained about the time I spent here while she was pregnant. We are owner/builders. When we did run into problems we reminded ourselves that it is only a house and that big volcano can blow any time and destroy it. It took us about 13 months permit to move-in. We have been in almost 4 months and we are getting close to finishing the finishes. I would build again in a heartbeat.

sweetwillie- speaking of decisions, we are going to pick out our brick on monday and are having a hard time finding someting we like. i like the brick you used (2nd photo). what color/brand is it?

thanks, john

For me its not the money (even though we are not rich) its not the time, its the decisions. I am so afraid of making the wrong decisions.

It helped us to keep in mind that most decisions can be undone later, if you really find yourself really disliking what you've chosen initially. It's "only a matter of money". :-)

It also helped me to realize that it's unlikely that you can choose "perfectly" in the process. We planned pretty carefully, and yet there are things I wish in hindsight we'd done differently, and some are not minor cosmetic things. I wish we'd made the garage a few feet wider, made my workshop eight-ten feet longer, made the entry hall a foot wider, hadn't included a skylight in the stairwell, hadn't included an exterior door off the dining area, etc, etc. But once again, if we really can't live with these mistakes, then they could be fixed. The cost would be relatively enormous, compared to (say) repainting, and it's unlikely we'll ever decide to do it. But just the fact that you do have some freedom to unmake decisions later, helped us to relax a little.

--Steve

Life is stessful, if you are building, it goes with the territory. Definetely not losing your sanity, marriage, or family life over a house or any other materialistic "thing".
I've worked for some folks who are so anal concerning their house that i think it has literally put them over the edge. When you see someone litereally measuring the blades of grass on their lawn, something just aint right. I consider myself as much of a perfectionist in my work as possible, but in reality, it's not a perfect world. It's okay to strive for perfection as long as you realize that it's not always achieved.

It might not be the holy grail but the environment in which you live is incredibly important and not just for comfort and convenience; it's a very personal extension of your family's life. The most stressful aspect of it is that unless you don't work for a living, are wealthy, and childless, you can't give it your full attention and that is what it takes to do a good job and avoid panic.

Johnstaci

The brick I believe was called 1861 Yorktown. I bought it through Crown Brick in Crown Point Indiana

I totally agree with you! I thought I would love building. I thought I knew just what I liked, etc. I do have a decorator and that has helped. I just use her for some consultation. She has built three of her own houses. She told me early on that this house would not be perfect. Letting go the idea of perfection has really helped!

And, on your question about the wood--I love wood. I have will have wood on nearly all of my first floor. That being said, I will have carpet in my bedrooms--I find it comfier. I am not a huge tile fan, but will have it in the sunroom and mudroom and bathrooms. Good luck. You will do great.

The feeling that it would never be finished!! Then again, 6 years is a long time. LOL