Gorgeous family! You are beaming! And I can't help but notice the boxer, I have a brindle girl and she is absoltly the best dog ever. That little baby is adorable too.

So glad it went well. I have been thinking about you but didn't get to post much the past few days. When they don't listen you figure they must be feeling better lol. The only time they listen is after its too late, lol.

Last summer, as my oldest was coming into his sophomore year, I convinced him to try honors lit. He had required reading, 3 novels to complete before school started, quizzes on them week one. I felt bad for him, reading Jane Eyre is not how most 15 y/o boys want to spend their summer. ;o) So I said I'd pay him 3 cents/page. Which earned him $10-15 for each novel. His brother, then 11, thought that sounded like a good deal. So I made him the same deal and he also read about 3 books, but shorter. I do not pay my kids allowance for chores, so this deal was especially sweet to them. If you don't want to do money, you could do points. In the Accelerated Reader system so many schools use, each book is worth points. The last school my kids went to had an "Accelerated Reader Store." Kids could spend their earned AR points on cool school supplies, small toys, trading cards- a lot of stuff donated. You could trade points for privileges. Maybe 60 minutes reading (or points/pages) earns an extra 30 mins of gaming/TV time. My 12 y/o needs motivation/reward to read. Even it that's a grade. He knows he is required to pretty much always be reading during the school year. He has to turn in reading response homework and take AR quizzes. So he does what he has to do, he does want the grade. I don't pay during the school year. Unless there is a book *I* want him to read, something of more literary quality than he might choose on his own. Even his reading teacher this year said she will offer rewards for kids who read books from the classics or Newbery prize lists. My 12 y/o loved the Eragon series. Those were challenging at the time he read them, and long. We borrowed them on CD and he followed sometimes. He loves to listen to books on CD. If I download them to my iPod, he will listen in the car or while waiting for siblings practices. (I found out our library has a selection that can be downloaded free and used for 3 weeks before they expire.) I do not see that as cheating, following along with the text while listening. And when it's for pleasure, just listening. My DS has a huge verbal vocabulary. His teachers who know that reading/writing is struggle for him are amazed b/c he uses higher level vocabulary in conversation than they expect him to have based on his reading. But he will not recognize half those big words on the page. That frustrates him. It confounds me, too, when he brings me the books, "What's this word?" b/c I've heard him use the word, correctly, for years! But when he follows along with the CD, he gets so much more of the vocabulary, it's very instructive. He is also just a verbal learner. He can read a story on his own and recall next to nothing. But if he hears it, he knows every detail. So this combination makes sense for him. My 9 y/o DD, sheesh, I'd have to pay her NOT to read! A "special treat" for her is a trip with me to the library or, better yet, bookstore! I hope her interests stays this strong. I just gave my DS 39 Clues, a mystery series that comes with cards with passwords to go online to supplement the mystery solving in the story. I don't know how it is yet, I literally gave it to him as walked out the door to school this a.m. and I have not read it yet myself. But I think it's an interesting idea, especially for less willing readers who do like computers (is there a kid who doesn't?). The school librarian has recommended a series called The Olympians, by Rick Riordan. The first one is called The Lightning Thief. Children of Olympic gods/goddesses are alive and living normal lives today, except they have to save the world. This appeals to me b/c of the allusions to classic mythology, a very good thing to be familiar with. Yet I'm told kids love the books b/c they are witty. Actually, classic mythology is in our school's reading curriculum in middle school, so it gets bonus points for me. Myself, I love the kids books by Carl Hiaasen, Hoot, Flush and the latest, Scat. I think they are hilarious! The misfit kids discover the "bad guys" plotting a crime against the environment and break a few small rules to prove it (like skip school, sneak out). It always ends well, lessons learned by all, and the bad guys especially get some punishment. The best irony! But be warned, parents who expect really clean books for their kids, there are some 4-letter words and misbehavior. It does not bother me b/c I think the books are too much fun to read, and it does work out well in the end. Also, they are excellent ways to talk about character development, descriptive settings, irony, foreshadowing, and more, on a kids' level. They are great to read together and talk about, there are good topics for discussion and humor to just enjoy together. Jerry Spinelli, another really good author to know for middle grade readers. Kids love him, topics they can relate to, funny, and not usually too long. But look at the summary, b/c of the topics, some books are for more mature readers than others. Some are great for 4th grade, some better for 8th grade. Remember kids really do learn a lot from reading fiction. Not just vocabulary and spelling. But they pick up great information (like the mythology stuff, or in Hiassen's books, geographic details about the environment) that they will store away in their minds. What they learn from good fiction will help them across the curriculum. (Yes, I'm a middle school reading teacher, I'm just not working these days.)

Thank you everyone I know I am being a bit sensitive and probably a bit insecure and worrying when I should be grateful. Our living situation makes me insecure. I blame my mother lol it's something I deal with in therapy but I still have made any headway on it. I have lived the 'with money' life with my ex and even when I say, id rather have love than money any day, since I've had both, I still wish I owned my own home, in a neighborhood full of kid with my own flowerbed to dig in and my own walls to paint. It's a goal. We are close but it's been a long two years. Mostly because I have legal fees out the you know what... And I married a man that never planned to marry or have a family and so he never planned for the future. At our ages we are just starting and we have two kids to raise... One is half way out the door ... My son will be settled and in a home in a neighborhood before he starts school and he probably won't remember that if it weren't for hand me down clothes, he might have not have been dressed the last two years. Thank goodness for our blessings because we have always been able to pay the bills, afford extras for the kids and cover the little things that come up in life. I come from a home where we never moved. My mom still lives in the home she bought 42 years ago when she married my biodad. Our lives were always very settled and we all went to the same schools, had the same teachers etc. Grew up with the same neighbors and friends. Dd has moved 3 times in her life, has been to 2 schools and I'm just feeling guilty that we aren't as settled as we should be. I know people move all the time but for someone that came from such a settled background, it's hard to justify to myself my unsettled feelings. I know my Dd doesn't care, I'm sure she doesn't. She is too worried about what books she is going to read and what performance she will do at the talent show. With that said, she hears a lot from her dad about how crappy we live. I know he and sm are just trying to upset me and maybe even make her think the grass is greener over there. I would not say I am jealous of them at all but I feel insecure that he COULD provide a more stable environment for Dd as far as a home goes. Nothing more. I provide fine for her mentally, emotionally, financially. He has made comments that with the amount of support he pays we should be living in a better area. Couldn't be further from the truth but I internalize it and I worry that as Dd gets older, she is going to buy in to what he says to her. And she won't want to be with me anymore. It's just a fear I'm sure there is no basis for it but it is my feelings and I can't do anything but accept the way things are and move on. Thanks again for letting me vent here and giving me great advice. I really appreciate it!!!