Don, the fish saga. I can relate. When we first put in our pond after tearing out the spring fed cattle trough, we traveled half way across the state to hand pick fancy fish. rofl. After watching them disappear one by one they were replaced with "feeder fish" from the box stores. Those poor little things raised to give to carnivorous fish instead of pellets. Those twenty cent specials cross bred with the fancies and it's been fun to watch over the years all the different shapes/sizes/fin configurations of the offspring. Some of them are large enough they'd meet legal limits for a pole. LOL. Funny thing is, I've never seen a coon at the pond. The tomcat sits and gazes longingly, a heron will come perch now and again, but never tried to catch one. As for culture disappearing over a relatively short period of time, how true it is. I went to a financial planning dinner once and the speaker asked how many of us could name all eight of our great grandparents. I was the only one in the room who could. That struck me dumb. What person doesn't expect to at least be remembered by their ancestors to the children of their grandchildren? But, most aren't. I do genealogical research for others on a volunteer basis, or did when I had the time for it, and one of it was taking off Church records written in old German script. Many of those in our community were members of German speaking churches, including a few of my kin. And it was the proverbial brick wall they ran into. One of my instructors in University insisted we learn it for research purposes and it was one of those things one thinks "yeah, and when I am ever going to use this in my life?" and ends up doing it, only it had nothing to do with chemistry. LOL.

Most made me laugh, and one made me go right on! I love love love Alice Cooper's. They're here to play golf? HA!

My now 14 year-old step GS is/was mean-spirited, even as a little kid. When he was 9, the cops had been called on him many times. Then he broke a window (in custody of other Grandma) and tried to kill his 8 year-old brother with a piece of the glass. He went to kiddie jail for a year and a half, and his little brother came to live with us (with only eight hours notice). Little brother obviously had severe emotional and behavioral issues. Had been diagnosed with Asperger's. Right - NOT! He had never had discipline or consequences, had been severely abused by brother, had never been educated. Then when brother got out of jail, he sexually molested several of his grandma's daycare kids, including his 5 year old cousin. He has now been in a treatment center for several months. Rather than gracefully accept treatment, he has escaped campus, broken a staffperson's arm while wearing a straitjacket, etc. At first he had numerous episodes a day, now he can go for a few days. Prognosis is not good.

It seems that my post spoke more of my SD, and not so much about my SS. The situation at hand has a great affect on him as well. My SD never really bonded with BM like my SS did. He was always her favorite, and BM often pays much more attention to him. When she calls, BM will spend hours (literally) talking to him. But when SD asks to talk, as BM rarely asks to speak with her, BM comes up with some reason that she can't stay on the phone. In fact, SD birthday was`last week. BM didn't send a gift, or even a card. Worse yet, she didn't even call. Finally in the evening, SD called her. Once again, she could not talk to her. Once again, SD made up an excuse for BM's actions as to justify it (maybe the reality hurts too much). So I think that she is trying to gain Mom's approval by treating me as BM would want her to. As far as SS goes, I have never really been able to develop a relationship with him as he always "pushes me away". Perhaps he feels that even liking me would be in some way deserting his BM. However, lately we've noticed that he seems depressed. BM has not followed through on a few things (not that this is out of character for her), and my thought is that he is beginning to see the situation for what it really is. I think the pedestal he has her on is starting to crumble so to say. Unfortunately, I do have a tendency to let BM get me worked up when the kids act like brats and I know it's due to her influence. I try very hard not to take it out on the kids as I know they are stuck in a hard place too. It's so infuriating that someone 1000 miles away can have such an impact on the dynamic of our home. Oh, and what makes things all the more ironic is the fact that she and her BF just got married so that they can persue custody of his 2 kids from what she claims is a neglectful mother! She has even gone as far as to ask my husband to write a letter of reference for her as a parent. I could do nothing but chuckle and shake my head on that one! BM has even told SS that she could not put more minutes on the cell phone she got him because all of their money was going to the lawyer to try to get new husband's kids. Our counselor was disgusted when she heard this, as she said...What a slap in the face to that child. BM has told SS that when he is old enough to decide, that he can come live with her. So she will keep stringing him along I guess. Meanwhile it is tearing these children apart in the hardest time of a child's life.