Ohhhhh, to be out of school!!! I have two weeks yet!! and it has been so darn hot, and we don't have air conditioning in any of the buildings. It was 90 on Friday, even to hot to go outside for recess!!!Can you imagine that!! The kids had to lay under the shade trees to get cooled off. But I do love every single one of your daylilies. Queen of Narnia is a great white one. Hope you can spend more time in your gardens now!!! Cindy

Sounds like a well planned summer. I always used the summers with our violinist to really improve her skills for the orchestra the next fall. With fewer demands on her time in the summers, she really moved ahead every vacation in her violin skills. She started the violin in 3rd grade when she learned along with her classmates. Every 3rd grader in our school district learned the violin, and she had been looking forward to her turn in 3rd grade. She was concert mistress in 8th and again in 12th grade. I feel certain that her musical prowess opened college doors for her.

I think it is possible the SD does indeed keep caught in the middle of Mom and SM. I also don't think she 'lied' or told a half truth. At the time the discussion first took place, SD had not yet made plans for the summer break with Mom...after reading some of your previous threads, I can't help but notice there has been long standing feud over exact days/visits. The SD was wrong in that she committed and did not follow through on what she agreed to. The mother is wrong for pressuring her daughter to take 'a summer job committment' seriously and making a big ta-do over a day or day (something that this mother though has been known to repeatedly do). And you are wrong with withholding your relationship with the SD in a temper tossing hurt feeling mode. The girl really is stuck between the two 'moms'. One screaming 'be an adult' one minute while treating her as the 'child' the next. The other one still playing the same old games of rearranging schedules no matter who it affects in an all out path of having her daughter 'at home' as many days as possible (while still treating daughter as a yung child/early teen). In an attempt to keep somewhat harmony between the SD's 'moms' daughter ends up being indecisive, nonresponsibile and still kept very much the child while being told to act the adult. If I were the girl, I'd be tempted to remain where I attend school. Maybe visit for a a short spell with each side and work my summer at a job that would enable me to have something more than 'babysitting' for references. Because you are disappointed and your feelings are hurt you intend to punish the SD. You'll just after 15 yrs of being mommy #2 you'll just suddenly begin being 'her fathers wife'. And you'll label a 'test' to see if the relationship can withstand the 'test'. The first time SD expresed her newly found 'adult views' aka opinions (example, daughter's eating habits) you took a personal offense to it and again you're feelings are hurt and deny the SD who you say you want to start acting/thinking like an adult for her effort in doing so. The SD can't win here. Send LS to the daycare as now planned. Quite frankly you can read all the books you please on 'disengaging' and 'teaching assertiveness', but but until you start practicing actually raising the SD with the open mind that she is becoming an adult (even when her new found adult views annoy you), and continue to treat her as the child (both 'moms') it's just setting up more hurt feelings and keeping the girl a girl stuck in the middle. She's young, socializing with a whole new group of people, seeing different lifestyles and discovering who she is and what she believes. My niece as decided her new found 'thing' in life is to be a veggie,...she'd have a stroke to think you're LS eats skittles and poisons her body blah blah blah. LOL. Once 'kids' start expanding their social network, experiencing new groups and ideas, well they can be quite crazy in their new 'worldly views'. My 2 cents. Good luck to you. Sd has reached the age between childhood and adulthood and she's likely to say many more things that appear to be 'anti-you' (or mom or dad or the neighbor) while she opens those wings and begins to shape her own ideas.

If your child has an IEP, that will follow to the new school district. It will be with a different system and different teachers. We had to move a few years ago, I had one child entering high school, one child entering 6th grade and one entering 1st grade. The transition was the easiest for the 1st grader. He also had an IEP and it was addressed more aggressively than in our last school district, which nearly dismissed him at our last meeting, but I asked to keep him on to make sure (sometimes those IEPs are hard to come by for a kid who struggles). My high schooler had a terrible first year, but can't imagine it any other way now. My middle child is still finding his place, and was the most affected. He was double accelerated in math (two years ahead of grade) at the last school district, but they didn't have a comparable program here, or they didn't give it to him, although I offered his test scores (he consistently scores in the 99th percentile for math) and his history when registering him. They put him in a program that was one year above his grade, instead of two. He has an interest in going into engineering at MIT, so being knocked down by an entire year of math hurts him. In your case, going to a better district (whether you believe in the testing or not), it has to be better for your property values and for your kids when they apply to colleges. I would go with that in a minute and let the chips fall where they may. Keeping friends is small stuff in life. When we moved and my high schooler was so upset, I reminded him that when he goes to college, he is going to be in an environment like that.... a great big school and no friends. It is good practice.