Sorry it was posted twice. Did not mean to do that. Thanks..Mike

You all are the best, have I told you that? Yesterday was a trial, for sure. The minister gave a great service, and the caterer showed up on time and the church hall was set up correctly, so thank goodness the advanced planning all worked out. And I've never been so proud of my 10 yo DS. He got all dressed up in a shirt and tie and helped me dress all of the tables with tablecloths and helped the caterer set up and stuck by his mourning grandfather in a very supportive way. Everyone was commenting on how wonderful he was (even though he fidgeted in the pew through the whole service!). But there was the typical family drama. The worst thing for me happened when my grandmother's beloved girlfriends showed up at the church. I purposefully chose a church that was right near her senior citizens retirement community, so that her close circle of girl friends and neighbors could come. When "the girls" came into the church and seated themselves, I went over to talk with them. They immediately started asking me why no one ever called them to tell them where my grandmother was in the two months before she passed. I told them that back in August, when she was first hospitalized in the place close to her home, my mother went to my grandmother's house at her request to get her phone book and brought it to the hospital so my grandmother could call her friends. They acknowledged that they received her calls and visited her then, but then, after my aunt moved her to other facilities (and started isolating her from us), they couldn't find her. The only emergency number they had was my aunt's, and they left messages 2-3 times/week, begging my aunt to call them and tell them where my grandmother was. One of them even spoke with my cousin, who told them they didn't know any details (total lie) and that my aunt would call. No one ever called back. They were devastated that they didn't get to see her and say goodbye, and enraged as well. All I could do was apologize and tell them that we would have called if we had their numbers, and that there were times we weren't even able to find where she was. I felt so terrible for them and for my grandmother, and I know she wanted to see them. The last visit I had with her while she was coherent, she mentioned them and was sad that they weren't coming. Meanwhile, they were desperately trying to, but my aunt, for reasons I simply cannot understand, wouldn't call them back. I also have a very close knit circle of girlfriends. I simply can't imagine what it would be like if I was prevented from seeing one of them on in this manner, or if I was dying and they didn't come see me. It breaks my heart. Meanwhile, evil aunt spent the last three weeks telling my father that she couldn't deal with filing the will or doing anything to start settling finances, because she's grieving too much. She also told him she couldn't help at all with the service because it was too much for her, so I made all of the arrangements. My dad went by my grandmother's house yesterday morning to pick up her big band cd's to play at the reception after the service, and apparently, my aunt wasn't grieving so much that she couldn't hire a u-haul to clear out all of the best furniture. She had taken all of the valuable smaller items before my grandmother died, but this last bit happened after, while she was supposedly so deeply grieving. And she had the gall to ask my dad to help her go through my grandmother's clothing and box it up for good will. So she gets anything with any sentimental or monetary value, but he's supposed to help her get rid of everything she doesn't want? Anyway, taking things out of the house at that point is clearly not acceptable, and he will have to deal with it, but I just don't know if he has it in him. He seems to be continually surprised with her actions, although at this point nothing surprises the rest of us. At any rate, my grandmother is at rest and we have the closure we were looking for. I think these next few months will continue to be very difficult for my father, as he sorts through the shambles my aunt has made of everything.

Good points from the linked article, regarding juxtaposing the Fall fashion issue of GL against a Boy Scout magazine: ‘The Girls' Life cover is a sample size of one. While this particular cover appears to encourage teens and tweens to focus on their looks at the expense of everything else (and to tacitly say that being pretty is the only important thing) at first glance, a closer look at the magazine's web site quickly shows that previous issues bore covers focusing on stories about body acceptance, getting jobs, and dealing with bullies (and how not to be one) tucked amid pieces on fashion and celebrity gossip.’ ‘Karen Bokram is the founding editor and publisher of Girls' Life magazine. She told us that the outcry seems to stem from adults placing their own expectations and pressure on young people. She says that by the time girls are reading her magazine, they're already receiving mixed messages about what they're supposed to be (and with additional pressure from their peers to fit in), which is in part what her magazine is trying to help them navigate: I put this stuff in there, and once I point it out, people say — okay fine, you have a lot of high quality content, but you still should have it on the cover! And I'm like, okay, so we're shaming girls for having interests that aren't aligned with what you think they should be interested in? So getting good grades and making friends — which is on my cover — isn't within your wheelhouse? ‘

Nick, my favorite mezzo in trouser roles was (the late) Tatyana Troyanos, an American with the origin from your beautiful country. Carol, I don't know how far back early music you like, but in opera I think someone like Cavalli might fit the bill and this performance by a fab French countertenor Damaux is as good as it gets, I think. Seeing him at the Met's Giulio Cesare a couple of years ago made me a (albeit, somewhat reluctant) convert to countertenors. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FWWsHP7OooM One day, I hope we might have a thread about roses and classical music/opera. In my garden, I have a little "Richard Strauss corner" recreating flowers from his last song including a rose, though, like you, I prefer Italian (Verdi!).