I have so many good ideas from this post. Thanks so much! You have encouraged me to jump outside my (green and traditional) box :) I feel like I have the courage to try several different things and styles instead of boxing myself in. You've given me lots of places to shop that I've never seen before, too. I plan to buy several types of things to "try them out" as soon as I get the chance. Then, I'll just take back what doesn't work. It'll be an annoyance to drive back and forth to stores an hour away, but I really have to SEE it. I would love to paint my kitchen and living room that gray color above (first, doing it in my hallway). I'm so impatient - I want it all done today! Then, perhaps, I can get this kitchen finished and move on to the living room. Gotta convince my husband to stop working so much and work on the house instead!

Well, a few days have passed. My husband has been doing everything to change my mind about leaving him. I'm still here with him, so I guess I'm giving it a shot, I failed to mention in my first letter (I know it sounds like I'm sticking up for my husband, but it's really not that way), about the temper my daughter possesses. I know how to handle her, but others including my husband don't see her split personality. One minute she is a sweet little girl and the next she's on top of you screaming she is going to kill you in your sleep. That has happened to my husband just twice in the past 18 years. The first episode was 7 years ago and they haven't been close since. Things were getting good and now she lashes out at him again a few days ago, He has sworn to me that he never wants to see me cry like I did that night., nor does he ever want to bring out that hate in my daughter again. My husband and daughter have made an agreement to move forward, but how long it will last I don't know. I'm going to visit my daughter next weekend alone and I will be cuddling my grandson the entire time. I hope I can talk her into coming back and trying it again. Am I doing the right thing?

I use a diluted castille soap spray. It kills them for sure but they do come back every so often. I use Dr Bronner's liquid pure castile soap, diluted in a spray bottle. Be careful with other soaps that aren't actually a natural soap, but a chemical detergent. From what I've read, what makes Dr. Bronner's so effective is the potassium salts of fatty acid. It's basically potassium hydroxide added to a vegetable oil based soap. "The fatty acids work effectively on soft-bodied insects like aphids, mealybugs, spider mites, thrips and white flies. These fatty acids dissolve or remove the insects cell membranes and their natural protective waxy coatings, causing death from excess water loss." It works 100% on my plants and trees. It must be a direct hit though so make sure you get everything. FYI I'm in 10b and it gets super hot here. I tried Neem oil in high heat and had significant leaf burn. It's better if you can move in to shade while the oil is on the leaf. It worked really well for me in cloudy weather for plants in the ground. Very effective. But it's too sunny here on a regular basis and the leaf burn can be bad. I also get a good amount of scale and aphid infestations on various trees and the castile soap kills them too. It's so much cheaper than the prepared insecticidal soaps. A little goes a long way. I get mine at Target. It's hard to find in the store! In my Target it's with the lotions, not with soaps, oddly. "Safer Brand" insecticidal soap is a ready made brand that contains potassium salts of fatty acids and this is from there site... So... What are Spider Mites? Adult spider mites are tiny plant pests that are actually a type of arachnid. Like spiders, they have eight legs and most species spin webs. They can be red, brown, yellow or light green in color. Natural & Organic Controls What? The combination of Insecticidal Soap and Botanical Pyrethrins will kill Spider Mites on contact if they are spotted on your plants and Neem oil helps prevent re-infestation by killing the egg and larval stages of the insect. How? Pyrethrin is a powerful nerve agent and will paralyze and kill the insect on contact. Keep in mind this soap is not like dish detergent, its a base from a blend of natural plant sources and pyrethrin oils and come from the chrysanthemum flower. An effective and organic combination... When? Spray Insect Soap & Pyrethrin as a contact killer. Use in accordance with directions on the product label. Spray the neem oil product in accordance with directions on the product label. Safer® Brand offers a variety of spider mite control products to help control and eliminate this garden pest and revive your plants. Please check out our spider mite control products for more details about how they work and how, when, and where they should be applied. ------ Reading this, it looks like the Neem kills the egg and larval stage, but not the adult which might be why you are still having this problem. The soap eliminates the adult for sure. I've never use pyrethrin but it sounds powerful lol. http://www.target.com/p/dr-bronner-s-unscented-baby-45-mild-pure-castile-soap-45-32-oz-46/-/A-10770135?lnk=rec|adaptpdph1|related_prods_vv|adaptpdph1|10770135|1

I went to the Theodore Payne Foundation Nursery today and I on the advice of the hugely helpful horticulturalists there, I picked up a few California Fuchsia in 4" pots and a packet of California buckwheat seeds. Both are well suited to the environment in the easement, so maybe they have a fighting chance against the ivy I also bought an oz of their "Rainbow Seed Mix" to spread in an unirrigated border in front of my fence. It's a mix of Clarkia, Poppy, Gilia, Goldfields, Tiny Tips, Lupine and Phacelia. Should be a riot of color come spring (and lots of dead stuff to clear come summer) For anyone in So Cal and interested in native gardening, get thee to Theodore Payne. They have everything from grasses to Cali Oaks and cool classes every week. I can't believe it took me this long to finally go there. It's in Sun Valley in La Tuna Canyon. Fuchsia Buckwheat Rainbow Mix