Oops, I meant to say without your permission

Crep should be fine I think, once it gets growing it means it. When people do that sort of stuff it is v. annoying and pisses me off beyond any limit. Then again I am rather good in making a storm out of it, relatives or not, so by now family is pretty much trained that if they meddle with my garden they are likely to face my wrath.

Normally though you do not take cuttings from that small plant and certainly not 2/3 of the cane, that's either ignorance, either selfishness not giving a damn what happens to the mother plant.

That would be really awful.

I remember last year when an umbrella fell onto my Jude-the-Obscure rose and broke one of it's cane off, I was really upset. As of to date, the growth appears to be leaning on one side.

This morning when I found out that my brother had used my car last night, without telling me, I got really upset. I texted to him to let me know how I feel. He texted back and apologised to me, and I felt a lot better now.

I guess, you need to let your family know that you don't like it when people cut your roses. Speak to them politely.

Send them a text message (mobile phone) or an email if you are afraid to confront them. If it happens once, it may happen again.

it should be common sense not to take something of someone else's without permission.

People can be very weird. Out by the street we have a long (50 foot) hedge of white bush roses - they are about 3 feet tall. One time when the hedge was in full bloom I noticed my new next door neighbor approach it with clippers. She was not taking cuttings - she was after the flowers for her house. Before I could say anything she had cut an enormous "bouquet" - all by cutting just one main stem - she had actually cut out HALF of one of the bushes, leaving a huge hole in it, and an ugly gap in the hedge. She had a friend with her, and had not noticed me. As they headed back into her yard, I got really brave. I walked up to them, catching up with them just as they got to her front door, and told her (as politely as I could manage at the time) that I would appreciate it if she asked permission in the future if she wanted to cut any roses. Of course, she was embarrassed. She apologized, and scurried into her house (with my roses). However, she never did anything like that again, so talking to her immediately did work.

Another time Cass came by my house, and in talking to me admitted that she had come by another time when I was not home and had taken a cutting from my huge old Le Vesuve rose, and propagated it, and also took pictures of it and put it on her web site. I was thrilled and delighted! She is into saving old roses, is very knowledgeable, and had taken a small cutting off an enormous rose, which certainly did not hurt the rose, and was not noticeable.

So, to answer your question - it depends. It is certainly NOT a good idea to cut the main cane of a tiny baby rose by 2/3rds. The rose will recuperate, but that was a thoughtless act by someone who cannot know anything about roses.

Jackie

I'd prune their fingers

Does your SIL like to be...shall we say, difficult, or is she really this clueless?

I'd tell her that in the future, you would appreciate it if no one took rose cuttings without your permission. If she doesn't immediately apologize, I'd add...and you did it wrong! If she's not ashamed of taking your rose, she should be a little red-faced about looking so inept.

I'm lucky that all my SILs are great...except one. So my advice, is what I would say to her, if she did something like that. Hopefully, your SIL just made a mistake and is genuinely sorry :)

Nope, I wouldn't be happy with that at all. If someone asked, I would be more than happy to give them a cutting, (in fact I would be thrilled if some people in my neighborhood would become interested), but without permission, no!

A neighbor used to do it. I finally printed several signs saying: "If you want roses, please ask me first." That worked.
The funniest one, though, was the woman who would drive up here and cut roses. I THINK she was selling dried bouquets to some local stores.
But we didn't know that. We just knew SOMEONE was stealing blooms, and messing up the plants.
One morning, DH went out before dawn, to run the dogs, and caught her, rolled into a fetal position next to the roses, clippers in hand. Her car was sitting there, full of dried roses.
We called the cops. I mean, this woman was WEIRD. They found pot in her purse -- so with our agreement, they told her to never come back here, or they'd arrest her.
After that, we'd see her car around town, but she never did come back to our garden.

Jeri

Wow, Jeri, this is quite a story.

Mostly I don't mind. I grow roses and other flowers for people to enjoy. Clipping to resell is unacceptable and would probably prompt a call or complaint to the PD.

What does tick me off is indiscriminant herbicide and pesticide spraying. People can express their dominance over nature in their own yards, not in mine. I understand you can post signs to the effect that your yard is organically maintained.

Well, later that day I've found that she also chopped off a huge cane of Belinda's dream (I have a big hole on one side now), Double knockout and miniature rose Starina (also a baby, came from Chamblee 3 weeks ago). By luck she either didn't spot or hopefully found too small to cut my other babies: Duchesse de Brabant and Ambridge rose.
I called her husband (the only mean of communication with her) and asked him to tell her that I was very sad, but he told me how did I know that that was her and not my kids (!). I teach my kids to love nature and care for plants why would they do something like that? Well, he sounded very annoyed. When I see her I will talk to her as well.
I want my friends, relatives and neighbors to grow roses and I would love it if they wanted to take cuttings etc It is just when somebody totally ignorant is doing that - neither they will benefit from that nor my roses. And yes, my SIL IS ignorant.
I was going to buy couple of roses for my mother in law, but I am afraid that my SIL would just come over (she lives across the street) and chop them off as well :(

Your SIL does not value boundries.

She views your garden as an extention of her personal property, and has no problem with taking what she wants without permission. What she did was intrusive and aggressive, and I would take steps to firmly tell her that her actions were not appreciated and should not be repeated in the future.

What's next...robbing your closet?

good grief, that's rough. What a b*tch! To take cuttings from such a tiny rose is really ignorant too. Now, having said that, I do have to hold up my hands as I am also a thieving b*st*rd (cheers, elemire ho ho)and regularly plan excursions to our local botanical gardens (my god, i have corrupted my son too) for the express purpose of aquiring seeds for next years (and subsequent years) gardens. I don't always stop at seeds either. They installed a massive new lavender bed with 40 or so different cultivars and species.....well, I had some fun that day. By now though, most of the curators know me (and a couple have invited me and my son to private views in the stock glasshouses so I think they are like most gardeners, ie.keen to share). So that my karma is not totally blackened, I am pretty generous with slips and seeds and even whole plants myself so I think of it as part of a cycle. Since starting to grow roses from cuttings, I do realise that this is a potentially sticky subject since you do need to take quite a large amount of material in order to get some good meristem action with decent heel cuttings, so I would not ever simply help myself to this (not like nipping off the tiny tips of perennials, no) without asking. Anyway, in my experience, asking is more than just getting the cutting - you are having a dialogue with another gardener, always so valuable and enjoyable) so why not do it...ask, that is. If you don't feel totally hateful towards her, maybe you could preempt this behaviour and offer cuttings before she whips out her secateurs. Do any of her cuttings come to anything? At least, if they did, you have some consolation but if they simply wither and fade, perhaps some violence is needed - like a sharp slap.

I don't know how long your SIL has been part of your family, but maybe it was a diffrence in family culture?

My sister, mother and I are all avid gardeners, and none of us would think twice about taking cuttings from each other's plants. In fact, I took about 12 rose cuttings out of my mom's garden just this weekend while she was busy with something else.

Obviously your SIL did it incorrectly and needs some help learning about roses but I wouldn't necessarily assume malice. I might try approaching her in a less confrontational 'hey, if you want better odds of the cuttings working out, ask me and I'll help you choose the right ones' sort of way.

Some people out there have the attitude that if it grows , then it is from 'nature' and available for everybody to share... I have a Cumquat bush in my front yard by the street, and people regularly come and pick the fruit and some will strip it, it bears heavily and I'll go out and it's bare, someone comes and watches to see if I'm around and if not they strip it bare........my roses are back from the street abt. 25 feet, and people will walk across the grass and tromp into the bed to get what they want.. if I come out and say something they say 'how wonderful that mother nature is so great' and of course 'they don't have a green thumb like I do'.... grrrrrr.... sally

hehe campanula, I should invite you with your flock over and ask to dig out some rose I want from abandoned public grassland. I do not dare myself, especially with 'dem pensioners peeking through the curtains. x) But back in Lithuania we have done quite a few visits with a shovel to the abandoned gardens. ;)

Anyways rgvmom if your sister is inclined to be that way, get a vicious dog. It tends to solve uninvited guests problem.

what terryjean said & what labrea said, too.

Polite requests & talking about being "sad" don't work with people who steal (they think you're clueless), & people who steal don't care if your rose survives any more than a thief who breaks in cares if he breaks your door or lets your cat out to be run over.

I'd assume my dominant female face & body language & look her in the eye & tell her firmly & absolutely that she is not to touch any of my plants ever again.

& if she does touch or cut off anything, I'll cut off something of hers that *I* think is comparable.

IMO, it is courtesy to ask. It is rude not to ask. I would react to any rudeness similarly.

On the other had, if it is an abandoned house with no obvious person to ask, I don't think it a huge crime to take a cutting or two. It may be the only way to save an endangered plant. Again, this is just my own opinion.

Rosefolly

Good Heavens! I ditto Rosefolly (and LaBrea, but I digress).

Whether or not it makes an impression, I would tell the ignorant (no harm in being ignorant) SIL that she should:

Never do it again BECAUSE these are not common shrubs, they are historically RARE, valuable roses that I am growing to blah-blah. AND, by taking off entire LIMBS, you have stunted their growth and set them/me back by YEARS. LOOK at how disfigured they are now! I don't know how they will survive the winter!!!

That said, whether she OR the rest of your family gets it or not, you are thus not just a loon about little bushes you can get at Home Depot. But, I'd STILL get a electric wire fence ;-)

Dig a hole near your rose beds. Fashion a light cover for the hole out of twigs and leaves. Put sharpened bamboo sticks in the bottom.

As long as the plants we grow are beautiful and fragrant, there will be others that prune, snip and snap, both in covert and overt efforts to have what we have.

What a compliment to be coveted. :) :(

Just tell her the price of the plant, where you got it, including all miscellaneous shipping and other charges for a single plant, and ask her to give you the funds sufficient to replace it, now that she has damaged it without your permission.

'flock'? elemire? I think the word you mean is 'mob'. Ah, yes, the 'isn't nature wonderful excuse' - a favourite one for allotment 'visitors'. Along with the public garden rationale: 'we thought it was for everyone to help themselves', such pilfering is a common occurence. Actually, I suffer less from this than most other plot holders, mainly because I am gardening at the skiver's end of the plots but also because I grow lots of ornamentals and the veg is largely invisible behind the gravel gardens and fruit and rose bits. Even so, I have lost entire apple, cherry, blackberry and broccoli!! crops. Yep, I would say Harry has the appropriate punishment (I have certainly considered spending the night in my shed....although what I would actually do, if intruders appeared, I can't quite see that part). Perhaps rush them with a sharp hoe? Stab them with a sharpened dibber?

It sounds like relations with your brother aren't so great, either, or else he has a bad conscience about his wife's behavior. For the sake of family peace, I'd be tactful, but I'd be clear and firm: express a willingness to share cuttings and explain how to get them to root, but make it clear that your sister-in-law is not to take cuttings without your permission, so that she doesn't damage rare and vulnerable plants. It might help if you explain that these roses didn't come for the nearest big box store, as lagomorphmom said. If you can work in an implication that she'll have a better garden in the long run if she has you as a friend and gardening ally rather than as an enemy, so much the better, but unfortunately a lot of people don't understand this line of reasoning.
Good luck!!
Melissa

Wow, just the thought of anyone doing this to one of my plants stirs a dormant rage within me!

Anyway, I would address her in a calm, collected demeanor and try to get my point across in a non-confrontational way. There's got to be a way you can reach her.

BTW-- labrea and campanula CRACKED ME UP!!! How hilariously barbaric --prune their fingers! hahaha Agreed (sort-of) :P

campanula: pitchfork and torches. :D

although it remind me somewhat funny accident in my old garden, we heard someone walking around the greenhouse at night, so my dad grabs crowbar and rushes out, screaming "stop or I will kill you" just to hear "oink oink" of a wild pig. x)

Regarding the suggestion of getting a big, scary dog--

It works. However, be prepared for the very disturbing image of hairy roses. Ours is a chow-newfie mix and can't resist laying in the rose beds. Not only does she come inside with mulch embeded in her fur, but she leaves behind a considerable amount on the roses, stuck in the thorns.

And yes, it's a big problem keeping her out of them. She tramples, smashes, and digs. You'd have less damage by greedy snip-happy in-laws, unfortunately. I just can't imagine anyone helping theirself to someone else's belongings.

Ohhhh, flaurabunda, but your doggie has more to love!!! She sounds like the perfect size for a hug!

Remember how Dino used to tackle Fred Flintstone when he came home from work? It's very similar to that! There's a pic of her on here somewhere in the gallery, in my post about where to put my rose bed next year. It's the one where Jim (I think) wondered how a black bear got into a backyard in Illinois.

Since I have drifted so horribly off topic, rgvmom---you are welcome to borrow my bear-dog anytime you wish! :)
--Laura

LOL harry.

It's your SIL that is the problem. You need to get a bit angrier and not tell her you are sad, tell her you are pissed! And that she better not do anything like that without your explicit permission again! Don't be passive aggressive. Stand up to her.

Maybe tell them they aren't welcome there again until the pilfering stops. Whatever you do, it has to be something that will get through to them.

It's a terrible idea to take cuttings without permission. I tried several times to get permission, but my timing was always off. That's no excuse. It was a huge embarrassment to meet Jackie and fess up that I'd taken a cutting without permission. Jackie is gracious to give me a pass. I was, and remain, mortified. There's no "it depends" about it. Don't do it. It's very, very bad form.

Cass

Another thing if the plundering does not stop and the message does not get across, call the police. If the sibling family is that piggish to stampede over your property, sometimes it helps to get the point across if the authorities visit them regarding minor vandalism.