This was sent to me and was so funny-I knew you all would get a kick out of it too! After rereading it realized it should be cleaned up a bit-**** out the bad words, hope it's ok!

Dear Diary: Michigan Winter

>

> Aug. 12 - Moved into our new home in Michigan. It is so beautiful

> here. The hills and river valleys are so picturesque. I have a

> beautiful old oak tree in my front yard. Can hardly wait to see the

> change in the seasons. This is truly God's Country .

>

> Oct. 14 - Michigan is such a gorgeous place to live, one of the real

> special places on Earth. The leaves are turning a multitude of

> different colors. I love all of the shades of reds, oranges and

> yellows, they are so bright. I want to walk through all of the

> beautiful hills and spot some white tail deer. They are so graceful,

> certainly they must be the most peaceful creatures on Earth. This must

> be paradise.

>

> Nov. 11 - Deer season opens this week. I can't imagine why anyone

> would want to shoot these elegant animals. They are the very symbol of

> peace and tranquility here in Michigan. I hope it snows soon. I love

> it here!

>

> Dec. 2 - It snowed last night. I woke to the usual wonderful sight:

> everything covered in a beautiful blanket of white. The oak tree is

> magnificent. It looks like a postcard. We went out and swept the snow

> from the steps and driveway. The air is so crisp, clean and

> refreshing. We had a snowball fight. I won, and the snowplow came down

> the street. He must have gotten too close to the driveway because we

> had to go out and shovel the end of the driveway again. What a

> beautiful place. Nature in harmony. I love it here!

>

> Dec. 12 - More snow last night. I love it! The plow did his cute

> little trick again. What a rascal. A winter wonderland. I love it

> here!

>

> Dec. 19 - More snow - couldn't get out of the driveway to get to work

> in time. I'm exhausted from all of the shoveling. And that snowplow!

>

> Dec. 21 - More of that white s*** coming down. I've got blisters on my

> hands and a kink in my back. I think that the snowplow driver waits

> around the corner until I'm done shoveling the driveway. A******.

>

> Dec. 25 - White Christmas? More freakin' snow. If I ever get my hands

> on the sonofab**** who drives that snowplow, I swear I'll castrate

> him. And why don't they use more salt on these roads to melt this

> c***??

>

> Dec. 28 - It hasn't stopped snowing since Christmas. I have been

> inside since then, except of course when that SOB "Snowplow

Harry"

> comes by. Can't go anywhere, cars are buried up to the windows.

> Weather man says to expect another 10 inches. Do you have any idea how

> many shovelfuls 10 inches is??

>

> Jan. 1 - Happy New Year? The way it's coming down it won't melt

until

> the 4th of July ! The snowplow got stuck down the road and the

> s***head actually had the nerve to come and ask to borrow a shovel! I

> told him I'd broken 6 already this season.

>

> Jan. 4 - Finally got out of the house. We went to the store to get

> some food and a d*** deer ran out in front of my car and I hit the

> b******. It did $3,000 in damage to the car. Those beasts ought to be

> killed. The hunters should have a longer season if you ask me.

>

> Jan. 27 - Warmed up a little and rained today. The rain turned the

> snow into ice and the weight of it broke the main limb of the oak tree

> in the front yard and it went through the roof. I should have cut that

> old piece of s*** into fireplace wood when I had the chance

>

> May 23 - Took my car to the local garage. Would you believe the whole

> underside of the car is rusted away from all of that d*** salt the

> dump on the road? Car looks like a bashed up, heap of rusted cow s***.

>

> May 10 - Sold the car, the house, and moved to Florida . I can't

> imagine why anyone in their freakin' mind would ever want to live in

> the God forsaken State of Michigan .

I laugh every time I read this!

-B