So this weekend I took a pretty aggressive approach to spray everything with Neem. I also cut off any dead leaves etc. Tonight I still saw a few aphids and so sprayed them. The instructions say to spray 7-10 days but I'm spraying whenever I see some of them. Is that a good idea? I'm pretty worried because I have so many plants going that I really don't want them to die. Also, is it helpful to get outside as soon as possible? Which I'm sure will not be a for a couple of weeks since it's suppose to snow tonight! Thanks for any help or suggestions.

Well, one chemical begets another... Rooting hormone helps with transplant shock, but the nursery suggested a regular water/feeding treatment once planted. That mean excessive growth, which brought aphids, which needed to be killed, which caused leaf drop. On the positive note, there is fresh growth on the leafless plant, I'm hand watering around it to give it the ability to get water without drowning, and it seems to be recovering. I will be all set for the heavy growth summer!

I do believe you're right... Unfortunately, I'm confined to a south-facing sunroom ("Florida room"? Basically an enclosed balcony) in a 1br apartment, so I've got no real option other than crowding. I've got a set of herbs (chives, basil, thai basil, epazote, green shiso (perilla), sage, etc) in v. small pots (4") on the windowsill, a set of low shelves with some larger (~12") pots containing 3 tomato plants, a pair of 12"x24" planter boxes (peppers, eggplant, cucumbers), and a couple salad trays. They're all crowded together about as close as can be along a 10' window, sharing the sun. Most of the plants are touching other ones, which allows for easy movement of aphids from one to another, but space constraints (greed?) don't give much in the way of options. The small-potted herbs are mostly aphid-free, its the big ones that have the problems. Strong water spray is out, the big ones are not very mobile so can't move to shower (tomatoes are attached to the wall--don't ask why--and planter boxes are awkward and heavy) and carpet makes in-place spraying difficult. I originally let things pretty much lie as they liked, but noticed my first batch of cilantro and snap peas completely COVERED with aphids and went into emergency spray mode. Things have mostly calmed down, and I've since mostly stopped spraying and have been hunting by hand under leaves, sometimes twice a day. However, this is all pretty high-maintenance, so was wondering if there's any middle ground between obsessively spraying/hunting and complete laissez faire letting the aphids have their way. Is once-weekly or biweekly spraying really a good option in an indoor aphid predator-free environment?

Have you ruled out a nutrient deficiency? I'm not super experienced but it kind of looks like a phosphorous deficiency to me since the leaves are turning such a distinct shade of purple on the third photograph down. Like I said though, I'm hardly an expert. And I'm not sure if the deficiency would also cause that yellowing, so you may be dealing with a different issue.