Well, Stevied, thanks for your concern about "hijacking" my thread but I think we would all be better off if it morphs into a discussion of how we can all (male and female) be more sensitive in communication with our significant others than if it remains a narrowly focused thrashing out of my little problem. After all...I've already relegated that to the "last week's annoyance" category. Some might say that I've swept it under the rug...I prefer to think I've moved on. And I think I might learn a lot from a man who is willing to think a bit about these things. A different perspective, doncha know? I suspect that part of the problem your wife has with your attempts to communicate stems from old hurts. She may be expecting repeats of earlier disappointments and such. It's hard to imagine that a husband who would make such a sweet, humble attempt to understand and change would be rebuffed. There must be some issue lurking here. Have you asked about that? You say that you still can't help her feel better - well, apart from the fact that one person really cannot be responsible completely for the feelings of another - have you asked her to break things down for you into really small, doable bits? If you find that you just don't know what to do or say, could you say, "Honey, I can tell that you are hurting and I hate that and really want to help. What do you need me to do or say right now? What am I not getting about this? Do believe me that I want to understand and am not trying to be thick...I just don't quite see it and need you to help me understand how to help you. I'm hoping that if you walk me through it a few times I'll start to get it on my own." Any woman who would reject that must have a LOT of mistrust left over from somewhere. And those issues will have to be dealt with before progress is made. Also, apology has its valuable place. If you react in a way that turns out to be mistaken, apologize! Right away you can say, "Whoa! I think I read that wrong. You were serious, weren't you? I'm sorry I didn't get that. Let me back up and try again cause I really didn't want to hurt your feelings." And you may need to start out by assuming that it's ALL important for a while. Rather than putting all the burden on her to announce whether you should really pay attention or not, how about just assuming that if her mouth is moving you need to get in gear? I seriously doubt that she will be as annoyed on account of you taking something seriously when she was kidding as she would if you ignore her when she is trying to get your attention. You say that you want to help and you just can't seem to figure it out? Well, take the time and trouble to just pay attention to everything she says for a while and see if that helps. Really listen every time she speaks, take a few seconds at least to try to see what she is really saying and if you don't get it ask her to clarify for you. If nothing else, it should be a huge compliment to her that you are willing to pay attention to her. We really do teach others how to treat us. Heaven knows what I'M thinking...I seem to always teach people to take me totally for granted and to ignore my needs. When will I ever learn NOT to do that? Or HOW not to do that? But it's always easier to give advice about someone else's problem than to figure out our own or to take advice when it applies to us. So why shouldn't your wife teach you what she needs? If you are as willing to learn as you appear to be, I think she would be making a huge mistake not to jump at the chance. Guys like you don't grow on trees!

Whew. I thought you were talking only about me. The only photos I have posted of the kitchen are the ones that the photographer took when shooting the backsplash. And now, I have to find all of my photos (from my old blackberry and the old computer and get them uploaded, again, to Photobucket. The Kitchen Folder I had on PB disappeared. I guess I'm guilty of wanting it to be really done. How's this? I keep moving the punch list from place to place as we work on other projects. It was on the doors to the laundry room closet, then the back door and then I found it folded in 1/2 on the washer. Well, last night I grabbed it and taped it up to the inside of the closet in the laundry room (look closely at the photo below of the closet, you can see it). You have to understand...the laundry room ONLY has a Washer & Dryer in it....the walls have been painted, the doors are MIA, the floor has been ripped up....all in anticipation of getting that gorgeous floor that WE won. Want a sneak pic of how it's coming along? I've placed some tiles on the floor with a piece of trim, so here you go. And I promise to post finished kitchen pictures too, soon. I mean I guess you won't notice if the backdraft thingy is in the venting or not, right? (Oh and we've been working on the basement and I redecorated my 20 yo dd's room--been kinda crazy.) So, some quick photos of the laundry room just so you know what's happening around here:

I thought my house was funky, but yours is even quirkier. I would not fight the funk- I would go with it. Instead of trying to make it look traditional, which won't work with that roofline, how about going modern/Frank Gehryesque? (Not that I know what that is.) Here are some outside of the box ideas: 1. Change the front siding to match the sides and attic (?) area. 2. Change the garage door- maybe to a modern barn door look with two doors. 3. Replace the attic windows with a series of identical clerestory windows from side to side, about eight of them. Big wide trim around them. 4. On the second floor, continue the window pattern that's over the garage all the way over (probably mean adding three or four more). Wide trim around all. 5. Metal or galvanized tin roof. 6. New door: single light french. 7. Depends on what rooms are on the first floor, but I'd put another two single light french doors, sliders, to the right of the front door. 8. Pergola from end to end of the house to define the first floor, with a solid (galvanized tin?)roof over the entry door or maybe all the way across. With a patio outside in front of the single-light slider. 9. Paint: charcoal gray with black trim, or dark purply-brown with plum trim. Or warm tan with white trim. Or...? Landscaping: tall spiky things. Good luck. I have had a heck of a time working around the bizarre add-ons on my house. Each part of the house still has different siding. So I am in the same boat- except that I have only one story to contend with, which makes it a little less daunting. In any case, it will not be cheap.

rhome, thank you so much for neglecting your children's education to help me with my kitchen. That's what I've been doing lately. Thank goodness we live in Ontario. When I've been doing this, my daughter has been designing the most awesome tree house which I really hope she forgets about by the time we move. I'm sure it would be harder to build than our house. Anyways, I absolutely love the corner pantries. They would be perfect for my kitchen. I have never seen them before, you're brilliant. I drew up two plans - one with the two and one with only one pantry. Although I think the kitchen looks so symmetrical with two and has a stove alcove, sniff, I think I would miss the counter space. That corner is kind of where I had a baking centre planned. What do you think? Again thank you so much for your ideas. Lavender lass - you probably won't believe this but I drew up the second plan before reading your post so there must be something there. By the way, I always read your posts, I have nothing constructive to say except how beautiful everything looks so I've never posted anything in reply but you have exquisite taste and your house will be just perfect. I have put a prep sink in these plans but really I don't understand prep sinks. I've never had one and I don't know anybody who does (in my small world). I've seen them online and they look nice - as some of you know I love sinks, but prep sinks? Can somebody explain them to me? I wasn't sure how big the corner pantries should be: I made the one at the top 48 x 30" and the other one, 48 x 33 because of the fridge. That is my fridge there isn't it? I could have reasons for either one but I think probably my fridge. I just realized that I didn't do a separate picture of just my kitchen this time so I hope you can see enough detail. Thank you again for all your help, I really appreciate it. Oh, sorry rhome, I was so excited about the pantries I forgot about the island. I enlarged it a bit. That looks pretty cool rounded how you had it. I would have to cut and paste to get it to look like that as well. If I just rounded what I have then that would probably be big enough, wouldn't it? Although if I have a prep sink on the island, I'm not sure what would get cut or if I would eat into the eating space. I'll think about it.