I would do the uppers the same as the lowers.

If it really bothers you, a smaller crown does seem like a much easier fix than hanging cabinets lower than the usual 18” above countertops.

I think that it will probably look fine as planned when all installed (and you get used to it).

I find it sad that people on here have to “brag” that they only run the dishwasher every other day or twice a week. Stop telling people what you can afford and imply that anything over your budget is wasteful. I suggested two dishwashers to my daughter when they were building in 2004. My son-in-law thought it was a waste until the first week they were in their house. My daughter loves, loves to cook and bake and they have a system for using both dishwashers. For the record, I only had room for one dishwasher and sometimes run ours twice a day. My husband loves to find new recipes-and it seems they require every dish, pot, pan in our kitchen! We both wish we had space for a second one. To the OP-sink in the middle of the two dishwashers and the trash to the left of the left one. Enjoy!

I've never had inset, though I like the look. I would like to caution that you speak with the cabinet maker about how the cabinets will be put together. In this post from a few years ago, the poster was disappointed because their new inset cabinets weren't ganged but were instead separate cabinets installed side by side. This resulted in a seam and a wider space between cabinets than they expected. I'm not saying that's wrong, just saying to be aware of what you may need to specify to get the look you have in mind.

Ganged inset cabinets:

Separate inset cabinets showing the seam between:

This might have some useful info: Everything You Should Know About Inset Cabinets.

Start over with the kitchen, even if it means a delay. Consider Ikea.

The effort is wasted on a dated space, and cabinet quality doesn't appear great. Few drawers....exposed hinges. Not worth it and mostly good money chasing bad. I'd save and wait.

Does it need to be eat in with that blank wall?

Do some measuring homework for the whole space, show the BEYOND area. Post it and come back

I don't like this slab. Fissures are natural and to be expected with this stone, but the fissuring is excessive and much too obvious on the top part of the stone and going down on the diagonal on the one side. It looks all scratched up in the distance shot, even though it's not.

Much better but you need to make sure you are accounting for filler strips against the wall and maybe between cabinets and fridge depending in your fridge requirements.

You have a lot going on in the midst of this renovation. Why must you chose a counter today? I ask because anytime you have to rush a decision the chances of making a mistake go way up... So take a breath and think about all that is going on. Don't let anyone rush you.

When I was struggling with a decision on my counters. We had plywood put in temporarily in. Crazy but it gave a us a chance and time to find the right stone for our space. I joked that I didn't care if the plywood got dirty because it was temporary. My point is don't rush. Take it slowly and make your choices with confidence not urgency.

A few questions...

Is there going to be a wall behind the stove or induction cooktop? Or is that wide open to harm little hands reaching up? What about a hood?

What are the floors going to be? Wood? Tile? Colors?

I love Polar Bear white by Behr it is a soft wonderful color. It actually has a warm peach beige undertone. I think it would look great with either stone counter choice you have listed.

Benjamin Moore has two dedicated cabinet paints. Advance and Cabinet Coat. These have a longer open time to allow the paint to settle to a smooth surface. They do take longer to cure to the hard coat you want. Off White Collection | Benjamin Moore This is the off white collection. If you click on Best Selling, they will arrange in what are the current colors. You can get a fan of all the colors or just pick up sample cards for the most current. Use these to compare the tones of slab material. Best to do that in your space with the different light conditions you have at different times. LED lights come in different white tones from 2700k to 5000k warm yellow white to blue white.